Sirens blare, and lights flash. Chief Cashman of the Yankee Fire Department rushes into the scene. "What happened?" He yells. "Can you hear me? Can you talk? Say something!"
But the Yankee Man does not speak. He just stares into the chief's lifeless eyes.
"This man needs help," Cashman yells. "Quick! Get the leeches!"
So go the Yankees, as they await the looming trade deadline. They are barely conscious, unable to move, and the fix that's coming is worse than the problems they already face.
The team has lost two straight, and six out of its last 10. The defense is horrible, and the bullpen is shot. It cannot hold a lead. With each error, with each baserunning mistake, with each lost potential rally, the team seems to be saying, "Screw the emergency room, take me to the mortuary." But the leeches are coming.
Last night, while the team was embarrassing itself on national TV, the Yankees started the process of draining next year.
They traded two legitimate prospects to the Colorado Rockies for 30-year-old Ryan McMahon, a 3B with little power and a .217 batting average. In his career year, 2021, McMahon hit 23 HRs and batted .254. Last year, he made the NL all-star team as a backup. This year, he leads the National League in strikeouts. The Yankees will pay him $16 million in 2026 and 2027.
He'll replace Oswald Peraza and Jorbit Vivas, the comedy team that was holding down 3B.
It's hard not to feel cynical about such a deal. The Gammonites will blather about how the Yankees filled their 3B sink hole. The YES team will gush. McMahon will bat eighth or ninth. Whatever. But unless he can pitch, he'll do nothing to alleviate the nightly horror show that begins with Boone's first pitching change.
The Yankees have begun the process of draining their farm system to mask the dismal reality that is 2025. In the long haul, it's a loser's strategy. We never learn. We just lie there and wait for the leeches.
You are correct, sir!
ReplyDeleteI.e. Hal never learns, or, more truly, doesn't want to learn.
ReplyDeleteThis post-May season is worse than last year's. Crapolini.
ReplyDeletePiiax, please let me correct you: Hal does not care. That's far worse than not learning, even worse than not wanting to learn, although it's similar to not caring. Hal is making money. Brian is holding down the fort. Boone is a human butt plug.
ReplyDeleteOur New York Yankees have devolved to stop gap moves...
ReplyDeleteA guy with a good to better than good glove who hits .217. But he was an All Star last year. And wasn't he great in 2021!
ReplyDeleteNow we're cooking! At least he's not error-prone like some other weak-hitting guy on the left side of the infield.
McMahon is better than what they had at third. At least this time, Cashman didn't overpay to acquire him, unless those two pitchers become top-of-the-rotation starters. In this market, the team couldn't afford the highway robbery cost of Suarez. But that's the legacy of mismanagement and the resultant piss-poor farm system. A system that hasn't produced a legitimate third baseman since 1998, when Mike Lowell made the team. And then, genius Cashman promptly traded him away the following year for 3 nobodies, Ed Yarnall, Todd Noel, and Mark Johnson. Lowell proceeded to torture the Yankees in the World Series and then over several years with the Red Sox.
ReplyDeleteThe NY Post is now calling them "The Bronx Blunders" that's going to stick and that's going to hurt and that's the kind of anti-marketing that might get some movement in Hal's brain.
ReplyDeleteSay it with me...
"From The Bronx Bombers To The Bronx Blunders - The Brian Cashman Years"
That will not get any reaction from Hal. The only way to get Hal's attention is a ratings plummet on YES and a noticeable decline at the gate. And it's too late for this year.
ReplyDeleteThe ratings plummet is possible but not likely and at this point in the season, whatever walk up traffic is still available would only be a drop in the bucket to a team leading the AL in attendance and second overall.
ReplyDeleteNo "businessman" wants to see his product belittled. It can be bad, if it's profitable, but made fun of and a joke that WILL effect the bottom line. Things are going to come to a head when the Yankees don't even make the Wild Card for the second time in less than five years. If not before.
DeleteWe are 14-22 (.389) since June 13. 2nd worse record in MLB.
ReplyDeleteMcMahon at 3B today. De Los Santos up from SWB, Vivas/Effross sent down.
Judge out of lineup today, batting .204 in his last 15 games, .160 last 7
Dominguez batting 9th.
Imaging on his elbow.
DeleteIf Judge goes on the IL we get to hear all the CashBoone excuses again this November and run this horseshit back next spring.
ReplyDeleteExactly right, Mildred
ReplyDeleteJudge is on the IL.
ReplyDelete