Tuesday, June 2, 2020

Virtual Baseball: A Hero Arises in the West!

With the entire Yankees organization downcast over the comatose state of John Sterling, a bolt of energy hit the Karz for Kidz broadcast booth in Seattle this evening.  Into the booth stepped permanent acting broadcaster Walt "Clyde" Frazier, available now that the New York Knicks failed to even come close to making had been eliminated from the NBA playoffs.

"Dry your eyes, Suzy, you're broadcasting with a doozy," Clyde announced to the whimpering Waldman.

When asked how it was that he could adjust to a baseball broadcast, Frazier replied, "Calling the Knicks is like speaking in bricks.  Calling the Yankees, there's no need for hankies."

Frazier expected that he would have no trouble picking up certain nuances of the game, such as judging whether or not a ball is a home run: "If you watch the feet, you know if it'll hit a seat."

Clyde's first game was less than eventful, as Seattle coasted to a 5-2 win over Deivi Garcia, but he did impart the insight that, "Deivi is gravy, when Paxton is back in."  When Gio Urshela hit a two-run homer for the Yankees' only runs, Frazier remarked:  "Gio Urshela is better than Roy Gerela"—then laughed, "Hey, c'mon, it's my first day!"

Dressed in a brilliant chartreuse suit with a matching rose tie, Frazier seemed to be in an ebullient but smooth move, and before the contest was out Suzyn Waldman seemed happier than she had been since John Sterling first went into the hospital for tests.  Followed by an operation, and then a coma.

"It's okay, Big John, we're just keeping your groove on," Clyde told Yankees fans, while Suzyn giggled helplessly by his side.




3 comments:

Ol' Yankee Daddy Roger said...

This is brilliant stuff. Clyde and Susan. Kaat and Susan.
Any chance we could exhume the Scooter to broadcast with Susan?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Well, we already reported that. But he escaped, or at least his recordings did. Look back through the virtual record on the righthand side there.

And thanks for the kind words.

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