Friday, November 2, 2007

The Case for Kris

Hard to believe, but RHP career-lugnut Kris Benson is out there! ripe for the plucking, in the 2008 free agent meat market!

He's only 32, with a career ERA under 5.00. Yeah, he's got the ol' barking labrum, and he didn't pitch last year, but life could be too quiet without A-Rod.

By signing Kris, we not only replace chick-magnet Carl Pavano, but super-vix Anna Benson replaces Suzyn Waldman as Yank First Lady, which is like Jeri Thompson replacing Barbara Bush.

Want our young Yank hurlers to learn new grips? SIGN KRIS BENSON!


4 comments:

  1. I thought she was married to Fred Thompson.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Fred would give up his current arm candy, and his run for the Presidency, for one dalliance with Mrs. Benson.

    -Fonzy

    ReplyDelete
  3. Isn't that Jaret Wright in that picture?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't know. If it is, though, that would explain why Jaret Wright never could pitch beyond the fifth.

    He was schztupping Benson's wife!

    ReplyDelete

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