To the Blogiverse that follows American League teams...
(Yes, you Rays Index, and you, Drunk Jays Fans, you, Doc Proc, Honest Abe, sliders, you poetizers, you dirty dogs, you, Murdoch, you injured pitchers, you Bob Costas punching-bags, and of course you...!)
It is time to follow in the inspirational footsteps of the Master, Mr. Rush Hudson Limbaugh.
(Which does not necessarily mean standing at the keyboard, due to the pain of a draft-deferment-causing pilonidal cyst.)
As everyone knows, Mr. Limbaugh ruined the Democratic Party's chances in 2008 by dispatching his army of unique visitors to cast primary votes for Hillary Clinton, thus destroying Barack Obama.
We! Must! Follow! Suit!
The All-Star Game in July will determine World Series home field advantage. Clearly, the AL must win...
SO LET US IMPLEMENT:
OPERATION: CHAOS
LET’S SABOTAGE THE NATIONAL LEAGUE ROSTER.MLB is allowing anyone to vote on-line 25 times. Using fake names and email addresses, each of us can vote a million times.
Let's not cast votes for Hillary Clinton, but Wily Mo Pena!
Here’s the NL batting order we need to face. (Each is on the ballot.)
Omar Vizquel, San Francisco Giants, ss
Ty Wigginton, Houston Astros, 3b
Wily Mo Pena, Washington Nats, rf
Mike Cameron, Milwaukee Brewers, cf
Shane Victorino, Colorado Rockies, lf
Dan Ortmeier, San Francisco Giants, 1b
David Ross, Cinncinati Reds, c
Jason Nix, Colorado Rockies, 2b
(And while we're at it, Yank fans, let's support our most productive shortstop: Julio E. Lugo, Boston Redsocks.)
Vote early. Vote often.
Remember the motto:
"Tinkers to Evers to Chaos."
You'd make a mockery of the All-Star Game, a sacred institution that so many people have interrupted their summers watch for 30 mins??
ReplyDeleteYou sir are no Patriot.
Which is fine by me.
As we say in Chicago, "Vote early and often."