Friday, July 10, 2009

The 10 Central Tenets of Sterlingtonian Philosophy



1. Reality unfurls as a random progression of independent happenstances, and no knowledge-based system of man -- however complex and well-conceived -- can reasonably predict what future sequences will occur.


2. If one concedes free ground without even challenging an opponent, especially when it is the first in a sequence of individual confrontations slated for the immediate future, the person risks paying an enormous price.


3. Those who occupy a booth above the fray can truly know nothing or ever adequately judge the decisions of a field general in the heat of battle.


4. That said, bunting on a 3-0 count is a terrible, horrible decision.

5. If the movements of physical athleticism were easy, they would always be accomplished perfectly, without error; but they are not easy.

6. Youth brings the special spark of mirth and warmth to veterans fatigued by the grind of battle. Young people are the future.



7. The fundamental flow of time surges ahead more quickly, as if propelled by pulses beyond human comprehension, during the advent of the Daily News fifth inning.



8. Nothing more stirs the human heart than the image of a flying white orb disappearing far into the stands; if a certain playing field encourages the number of times that such divine acts occur, that special space must be celebrated... not questioned.



9. There are several Joes, but only one Captain... and one Mo.


10. All of life's seemingly unanswerable questions shall be resolved by the critical analysis destined to take place in the post-game show.

11 comments:

  1. Maximus BloviaticusJuly 10, 2009 at 7:41 AM

    The central tenet is that the entire battle is predicated on the persons initiating the battle.

    It is impossible to have a surplus of such persons.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That's beautiful. Maybe we need a set of postulates.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maximus BloviaticusJuly 10, 2009 at 9:54 AM

    One must adapt to the circumstances at hand.

    ReplyDelete
  4. There is much more between heaven and earth, foul pole to foul pole, than is dreamt of in Steril's philosophy.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Maximus BloviaticusJuly 10, 2009 at 3:27 PM

    Corollary to JeffG:

    The battle is enjoined within the limits of the assigned arena. The results are determined solely based on the events therein.

    There is no effect from verbalization of the presumed outcome, regardless of the loquaciousness of that verbalization.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Maximus BloviaticusJuly 10, 2009 at 3:30 PM

    That is the motivation to enjoin the battle, despite bloviation concerning it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. No spirit under heaven trades a greater bounty of the land than Remax.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Maximus BloviaticusJuly 10, 2009 at 3:55 PM

    Verbalization of the events of battle were conveyed from the arena by means of a general purpose vehicle steered by the able Centurion Jeepicus Primus

    ReplyDelete
  9. I provide the means to convey the events of the battle. Join me in fabricating useful structures.

    ReplyDelete
  10. HAHAHAH @ Superfrankenstein, that's amazing.

    ReplyDelete

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