Saturday, March 13, 2010

Yankeetorial: Is Curtis Granderson doomed?


Curtis Granderson has now worn the holy robe of Yankeehood for one week.

But he's into Month Three of his total home makeover from the grand strategist of strokers, Kevin Long.

In January, the Yankee hitting coach met with the new Yankee hitter in the desert. Immediately, Long smashed Granderson into a billion pieces, so the process of reassembling him could begin. This is the new Yankee Genome Project, whose motto is: "If it aint broke, break it." Sometimes it works. Ramiro Pena and Francisco Cervelli have supposedly become major league hitters this way. Sometimes it doesn't work. The most famous example is Kei Igawa, who some scouts say was destroyed by Yankee chefs, adding spices to the broth.

In the old days, it was old Billy Connor who was supposed to overhaul the diamond chip in every Yankee pitcher's forehead, down in Margaritaville, Florida. From Ron Davis to Paul Quantril, a week on the beach with Billy was supposed to have the curative powers of Scott Proctor burning his equipment at home plate. Now, it's Kevin Long. This is what Granderson says in today's Times.

“Everything I was doing wrong, I knew it up here,” Granderson said, pointing to his head. “But I couldn’t communicate it. Talking with Kevin, he made it click. That’s exactly what I needed to hear.”

Yeah. Well, insert sigh here.


Granderson has a lifetime batting average of .272 and he hit 30 last year. He couldn't touch lefties, true, and maybe Long can help. But the more the Yankees spoon out this guy's skull with an ice-cream scoop, the harder an entrance he's going to face in New York. The Granderson trade had nothing to do with the Yankees' abandonment of Johnny Damon (which, in fact, Damon was responsible more for than anybody.) But Granderson is our star outfielder this year.


Yeesh. It's going to be tough enough being the new Damon. He's got to be the new Granderson, too.

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