Damn. This is what happens when you get old and doddering: The world passes you by. A significant event, a cultural touchstone, takes place, and you're not there.
And who do I have to blame? A-Rod, of course.
That little infield nubbler sent me to the victory wagon, and last night I was MIA when Britney and Rihanna had their pillow fight. Damn. Those two sassy little linxes cuffed it up, feathers and everyting, and I wasn't there.
You don't many opportunities in life to take full stock of humanity's evolution. Miss one, and you're forever playing catchup. Britney and Rihanna in a pillow fight! And I missed it? How can I face myself?
Hopefully, a Kardashian will sit on a tack. Could Paris punch out Lindsay? Can somebody steal a Rolex? Where were you when Kennedy was shot, when Theisman broke his leg, and now, when Britney fought Rihanna with pillows? I was not there. O, Yankee gods, why did you forsake me?
I'd rather see a pillow fight between Kate Upton and Christina Hendricks. Au naturel.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, that's the ticket
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