Acclaimed public face of Yankee fandom pitched from airplane

Alec Baldwin, future U.S. Senator from the great state of Bipolarity, got tossed from an American Airlines death trap this week for treating a flight attendant like Kevin Youkilis.

Baldwin, seated no doubt up front, while in a fevered texting thing, refused to turn off his cell phone, prompting a jackbooted in-flight version of Rosa Klebbs - who should be tending to her beer nuts and ginger ale - to call in the pepper spraying thicknecks from DHS.

The company said Alec refused to comply, adding that he was "extremely rude" to the flight crew, calling people "inappropriate names" and using offensive language.

Well, Baldwin was just being a Yankeefan. That's what he's paid to do on those ESPN commercials with that sensitive pro-Redsock yuppie from "The Office." (I can never remember his name - Bronco Nagursky? Killer Kowalksi? Pleezedont Buttinski?) Let's look on the bright side: He just gave every Yankeefan in America a free open seat on the bus. Wear the NY cap proud, fellow travelers. No one will come near you.

The animals in the forest have sharp teeth... but they're more scared of us than we are of them. Yoooooouk.