Wednesday, April 25, 2012

More modern idioms for trendy baseball fans


Baseball traditionally has provided us with colorful expressions. For example, a great fielding play is “flashing leather.” A fastball high and inside is “chin music.”


But many baseball idioms have grown outdated. For example, who has ever really stepped inside a bullpen -- a pen for bulls?


Baseball needs new idioms, straight from the headlines, such as...

"A North Korean missile:” A long fly ball.

“… Youkilis swings and HITS A HIGH FLY TO LEFT! That ball is going… going … NO… it’s a North Korean missile, falling harmlessly into the watery glove of left fielder Delmon Young.  It’s a Kim Jung-out… not Kim Jung-gone.”

"The dog on the car roof:" A team carried by a slugger is.

“… With two home runs, Jason Giambi tonight was telling his teammates, ‘Climb on top of the station wagon, guys!  Don’t be peeing down the back windshield, ‘cause I’m driving us to Michigan, and you’re the dog on my car roof!”

"Individual mandate:" To move up the runner.

 “… With a man on second, Prince Fielder needs to hit a ground ball to the right side, fulfilling his individual mandate, even though the requirement not only clearly infringes on his personal liberties, but it imposes a potential financial penalty, as the result of his reduced batting average. Still, it’s the moral thing to do! Prince can’t just stand back and let that base runner die.”


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