Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Shoot Me Please: The Yankee 2012 Poem


Jeter always fights the fight.
Grandy swings like Betty White.
Here comes Robbie: Swing and miss.
Arod? Time to take a piss.
Swisher needs a smaller park.
Tex, he’s really off the mark.
Raul? We’re simply out of luck.
Russell Martin? What the fuck?
Who plays left field anymore?
Last one out, please lock the door,
Brian Cashman’s last regime.
Shoot me, please; I hate this team.

CC’s somehow lost his way.
Kuroda? Just another Kei.
Nova’s curveball seldom breaks.
Hughes makes serious mistakes.
Andy? How long can he go?
It’s not twenty-ten, you know?
And who’s our closer, Soriano?
Trust me, he’s no Mariano.
In the eighth, now Corey Wade?
Hell, this season’s fate’s been made.
I’m looking at one long bad dream,
Shoot me, please. I hate this team.

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