Just what the Yankees need: A bidding war for a right-handed fourth outfielder

Supposedly, the Washington Gnats - another team that is unafraid to sign players - is ready to shop Michael Morse - the great Michael Morse, as he is now known.

Morse is 31 - too young to be a Yankee. He hit 18 home runs last year and drove in 62 runs. He only struck out 97 times. None of that matters, of course. What matters is that he bats right-handed and he's on a one-year deal. Thus, he is "in our sights" for a trade.

Well, WTF do I know? It depends on what we give up, I guess. But as we have learned, Manchild Cashman works best with the surveillance cameras off - and when no teams are bidding against him for a spare part. From the looks of things, Washington plans to put Morse on a flatbed truck and drive him from city to city in a Catwoman outfit, sitting in a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios. This won't be a sneaky, behind the scenes burglary, and Washington won't take Chris Dickerson - the unappreciated one - straight up. This is the other Washington, not the one that can't run anything.

Any longtime Yankee fan knows that when other teams start rummaging through the bowels of our farm system, it's time to fear Fred McGriff Redux. (For you post-millenials, Old George traded the 18-year old Crime Dog - plus outcasts Dave Collins and Mike Morgan - to Toronto for Tom Dodd and Dale Murray. Fred eventually hit 493 home runs.) There's a ton of crapola written and blogged about the talent in Charleston and Tampa, but you never can believe it, because of the Yankeeganda mills. Now we'll know. If Washington runs off with a Tyler Austin or a Mason Williams, they were for real. So long, Crime Dog.

Depends on what we give up, I guess.  But damn - for a fourth outfielder who is going to cost nearly $7 million  - it better not be much. I'm still hugging Ronnier Mustellier, but really, WTF do I know?