Jete's in the news: Papa's got a brand new hag

Derek Jeter may or may not be engaged to Hannah Davis, who some are calling "the new Kate Upton," which makes Kate Upton "the old Kate Upton," which is sad.

Jeet's old enough to be - at least in parts of Florida - her father.

Listen: The Captain can do whatever The Captain wants. As John Sterling says, he's "an amazing human being." Most websites and gossip bloggers - the wisest people in the world - would consider Hannah Davis to be the Lou Gehrig of beauty: the luckiest girl on the face of the earth. And if they find happiness and joy together - well - that's all I want for Derek Jeter in life:  The man has already given me plenty of both.

But in my long and tedious time here, I've known some pretty cool, handsome guys - lady killers - who were always dating the hot babes, 15 and 20 years younger. They were living the life! And the relationship always ended with them getting dumped on the side of the road.

Of course, they weren't millionaires. (Actually, a couple were.)

Here's the deal: Does an intelligent 23 year old supermodel want to settle down and spit out kids, as the 40something husband might be inclined to want? Nope. The beauties want to experience Hollywood, careers, the fashion world - they want to make it on their own. They're not ready to be somebody's full time wife. And you can't blame them.

Of course, there is always true love, which transcends age barriers. If it's true that Jete's hitching up, well, let's hope he has found it. He deserves it. But it's gotta be ard work, being 39 and playing a 23-year-old's position. And it's going to take a lot of energy to be find a lifetime relationship with a 23-year-old stunner.

Insert sigh here.

Frankly, I always felt Derek Jeter was married to the Yankees. Does this news make him a polygamist?