Saturday, August 29, 2015

Fifteen runs: Did the Yankees just use up their allotment for the week?

Listen: It's great to see the Cueball, Brian McCann, return to Turner Town and whack a three-run Wolf Blitzer. Trouble is, it came as a postscript to a 15-run blowout, and my Nancy Grace spider sense began tingling before he touched second. 

Fifteen runs. Woop woop. But will that be it? Did our heroes salt their stats to compensate for last week's malaise against Cleveland... or, worse, in advance of their visit to the soreheads of Boston?

How about a little EMPIRICAL RESEARCH, baby, YEP, SCIENTIFIC NUMBER STUFF:

Here are the Yankee blowouts of the 2015 season, followed by their achievements over the next four games.

April 12: 14-4 over Boston. Next four: Average 5 runs, go 2-2.

April 22: 13-4 over Detroit. Next four: Average 4 runs, go 3-1.

May 11: 11-5 over Tampa. Next four: Average 1.2 runs, miserable, get swept 0-4.

May 25: 14-1 over KC. Next four: Average 4.7 runs, go 2-2.

June 20: 14-3 over Detroit: Next four: Average 7 runs, go 1-3. (Pitching breaks down.)

July 28: 21-5 over Texas: Next four: Average 5.5 runs, go 1-3. (This includes another blowout, as follows)

July 31: 13-6 over Chicago, Aug 2: 12-3 over Chicago, Aug. 3: 13-3 over Boston: Huge explosion of runs, everybody happy, YES/Fox News projects Yankees to win AL East! Next seven games: Average 1.3 runs, go 1-6. Yeuch.

Conclusion: Screw this science crap.

You can make numbers jump through hoops. Here's what my penis says: Whenever the 2015 Yankees get hot, they follow it up by going cold. They are a slightly-better than .500 team. Back in May and June, when the AL East chewed moose root, that seemed good enough. Then Toronto traded for Tulo and Price. Ever since, we have been wild carders.

Nothing has changed about the Yankees, other than the fact that Toronto cannot seem to lose. If the Jays keep it up, the Division race is over.

5 comments:

  1. We have the second highest scoring offense in baseball. You know who's third? Boston. You know who's fourth? Arizona. You know who's tied for fifth? Colorado.

    You know what the most meaningless stat in baseball is? Team scoring. Except statistically. Then it's very meaningful.

    ReplyDelete

  2. I'm still grappling with the fact that there were two penis references in this post. More later.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Looking at how he is playing lately and after last night's RBI's, it getting better and better to see this Amsterdam born player improving. Didi is an asset, no doubt about that anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
    God bless you
    I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.