Thursday, November 26, 2015

Repeat from last year: Lively, mirthful rejoinders to defuse political tensions over your Thanksgiving feast

Now and then, even nice families raise a super-Nazi. As a public service, here are some witty one-liners to extinguish the looming fist fight over the turkey buffet. When Cousin Cooter starts talking about "rounding 'em up and puttin' 'em in a pen," try these soothing comebacks to put a smile on people's faces.

"Hey, you know what? You're a fucking moron."

"That argument makes sense... if you're a fucking cretin."

"Thank you. I always wondered how the world looks to a 40 IQ head full of oatmeal."

"Pass the cranberry sauce, you vile, piddling, brainless shithead."

"Hey, I got an idea. Why don't you stick your fucking jizzy, Jerry Sandusky-breathed mouth onto the bunghole of this bird, and whisper into it all your bizarre and idiotic personal views, because nobody else wants to hear them, you ridiculous, one-track, slappy-headed dick."

2 comments:

  1. Some of my favorites:

    When do you get the ankle bracelet off?
    Do you have a job yet?
    When are you getting your own place?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
    God bless you
    I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.