Monday, January 2, 2017

Redsock '17 Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny (TM) might need a starter like the one they just traded

Reports out of Boston, the world's sports capital, say the Redsock '17 Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny (TM) might decide to acquire a Clay Buchholtz-clone, similar to the original Clay Buchholtz model that it recently dealt to Phily for a bucket of fried chicken.

You might think I'm making this up, or that - worse - you're one of those half-sentient robots in Westworld who relive the same day a thousand times, (and it's time to get nasty,) because this sounds even too daft for your core processor. Nope. It's true. ESPN's Buster Olney says so.

Olney says the Great Men who have assembled the '17 Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny (TM) are looking for "Clay Buchholz-like pitcher in trade talks, if not necessarily re-acquiring Buchholz himself."

This is because Eduardo Rodriguez - the Bostonian version of Michael Pineda - tweaked a carbunkle last month, and suddenly the Brain Trust is concerned that it's sixth, seventh and/or eighth starters - I think the names are Maddux, Glavine and Smoltz - won't be able to take their vacations in August, when the team is 20 games ahead. Thus, the Brain Trust might trade back for The Buchholtz, or a Buchholtzesque copy of Buchholtz, and - natch - give up less for him than they received in the first trade, right? That's how things go in Boston.


Listen: There are years when everything t;urns to shit for the Yankees, and 2017 could be a humdinger. But cheer up, everybody: We will still have ringside seats to the continuing ruination of the Redsocks, who always seem to rot from the same disease that takes us down: Hubris. Whenever Boston assembles a Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny, the juju gods laugh.

When you look at the Redsock lineup right now, it's hard to imagine Boston NOT winning the AL East. But it looks as though they'll pass on Jose Bautista and hope that Sandy Leon hits .300 again, and that Jackie Bradley Jr.'s second-half isn't the new norm. They're stocked, for sure. But now and then, while gazing at the beauty queen, you notice a pimple on her forehead that you hadn't seen before, and suddenly, you can't take your eyes off of it. Today, that pimple is named Clay Buchholtz, or the lack thereof.    

(PS. Sorry if you couldn't access a bunch of videos, which I posted last week, to appear over the holiday, so I could drink through the end of 2016. That's what I get for trying to outsmart the world. It won't happen again.) 

3 comments:

  1. This is a pretty funny alternate view of 2017, with the Yankees as the Miracle Team of the year:

    http://www.espn.com/blog/new-york/yankees/post/_/id/95472/imagining-a-dream-2017-for-the-yankees

    ReplyDelete
  2. WE MAY HAVE BEEN ABLE TO TURN THE TABLES ON BOSTON WITH THE ACQUISITION OF 1 PLAYER (2 WORDS)
    CHRIS SALE.......


    TOO LATE.......
    NO VISION.......
    I'M STILL SLUGGISH FROM YESTERDAY'S HANGOVER.....
    STRANGLE CASHMAN.....
    HAPPY NEW YEAR.

    ReplyDelete

  3. I really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
    God bless you
    I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.