Last night, the goods outweighed the bads

Ahh, dear Suzyn, pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name. Thanks for dropping in. I trust you left your soul and parking validation stub with Miss Bixley, the receptionist? Yes, the one with three heads. Excuse my sulfurous breath; I worked late last night. Now... where were we? 

Oh, yes, we were discussing the future! Today, rather than contemplate humankind's inability to predict baseball - a metaphor, of course - or the stunning reason why today will not be exactly like yesterday - different pitchers, my Precious, different pitchers! - I'd like to talk about why a loss is not always a loss.

Now, a loss is a loss, of course, of course, and nobody sleeps on a loss, of course. Defeat is the kicked ass, the barking gonad, the cosmic rejection slip that misspells your name. Every Yankee loss is a bad Yankee loss - only seemingly confined to the Yankiverse. Each defeat carries global consequences. If you don't believe me, study the Yankees' record during the Vietnam War. So - to summarize, dear Suzyn: Yankee loss = not good.

But there are losses and then there are fukkinay LOSSES. Last night was not what some fans - for reasons never to be discussed in the Sunoco Broadcast Booth - refer to as "The Pineapple." Dear Suzyn, it is the job of us in the eternal heaven and hell industry to protect innocents such as you from "The Pineapple." And last night, for all your sadness and despair, you can still sit comfortably in your hotel room chair. Last night, the Yankees didn't win. But they will, Suzyn. They will. Someday. Why would I say this? Let me count the reasons for hope...

1. Last night, with fava beans and a nice Chianti, you ate the liver of Houston's closer, Ken Giles. He threw more pitches than he's done all season. I wonder if he can pitch today. Either way, the Yankees stretched him to several full counts, where he skated on sketchy home plate calls. (We do own the umpires, Suzyn; never forget.) To top it off, Greg Bird crushed one off him. If I were Houston today, I would dread the next save situation like a news bulletin from the National Weather Service.

2. Mean Chad Green returned. Not that anyone had had lost confidence in Mean Chad, but - well - Hangin' Chad did give up that Game Two grand slam, which resurrected Cleveland from the dead (which in the state of Ohio is often called "Toledo.") Until he returned - and last night, he did - we had to wonder if something was wrong. No more. Let Mean Chad rest today, and you'll have him for the duration.

3. Masahiro Tanaka's resurgence continued. If not for a bang-bang play at first - Altuve beating out the infield hit - he would have thrown zeros against Keuchel, well into the seventh. In recent years, the Astros owned him. Tanaka could be inscribing his name in American history. This winter, he can opt-out of his Yankee contract. A month ago, few would have cared. Now, all of baseball will be watching.

4. Aaron Judge got a hit. He struck out only once, and my ump pinched him on the calls. The Yankees must keep faith with Judge. The fact is, it is humanly impossible for anyone - even Betty White - to look as bad as Judge did against Cleveland. He actually may have had a worse week than Harvey Weinstein. If Judge is climbing up from his pit - and we'll know today - he could shut the mouths of all those pundits so gleefully proclaiming little Altuve as MVP.

5. If someone can just get Gary Sanchez - who has caught lunge-itis - squared away, the Yankees can do damage. Last night, Sanchez was the last Yankee you wanted at bat. When replaced for a pinch runner in the eighth - he was walked - you had to feel that Austin Romine couldn't be much worse a hitter.

6. The defense continues to hold. Hicks, Didi, Starling, Bird, Toddfather - everybody continues to make plays. As long as you keep doing that, the pressure will build on Houston. And the dams will blow. 

7. Bird homered. Whenever he comes to bat, the entire Yankiverse feels a surge of electricity. It is a bolt from the future, Suzyn. With every Bird walk, with every Bird home run, Yankee fans foresee another Murderers Row, another M&Ms, another string of championships that will restore order to the world and bar the doors to Chaos for a generation. 

It's fun to believe, isn't it, Suzyn? And today, you must have faith. Just don't go making predictions.