Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Takeaways from a year of studying tabloid back pages

It started on a whim: "Tabulating the tabs" - deciding every morning which team "won" the back pages of the Post and Daily News - and to keep a running tally. To be honest, I believed it would show the Mets to be NYC's dominant team, powering volcanic explosions of my self-righteous indignation - (which is, by far, my most enjoyable form of indignation.) 

But today, studying the numbers, I bow in awe of the 2017 Bombers. Damn, it was a great year to be a Yankee fan! 

In tabloid attention, our team nearly out-performed all other NYC franchises combined, and unlike the others - who achieved many of their back pages via sheer incompetence and the resulting editorial vitriol - the Yankees won by unveiling new stars to the New York pantheon. For the first time since the mid-1990s, a wave of youth brought unbridled joy to the Yankiverse - rousing the ancient, underground, tribal intelligentsia that spans the five boroughs as much as their subways. 

Most notably, 2017 was the year of Aaron Judge - a larger than life figure in every way. For the first two months of his amazing introduction, sportswriters fell about themselves trying to create the nickname or phrase that would seal their place in Gammonitic lore. Then, one day, the tabloids shouted, "ALL RISE," and suddenly, the contest was over. Everybody knew it when they heard it. And when Judge fell into a tortuous slump in August - (if the guy EVER appears in another home run derby, I will shoot ESPN myself) - the entire Yankiverse grew sick with despair. 

And, yeah, let's give him credit: Brian "Cooperstown" Cashman did not trade Judge last winter for a "power" arm or "contract-friendly" lug nut, or any of the veteran detritus that we once dealt prospects for, as we chased that elusive single-game, away-field wild card slot. This year, we played the long game, and the results were so astounding, so goddamm joyful, that even now, we are terrified that the Yankees will revert to their old ways. Just let the kids play, Hal! That's all! Let the kids play!

Studying the numbers, I am reminded that "old New York" remains a powerful, ghostly consciousness within the city zeitgeist. The Yankees, Giants and Knicks still dominate those "new teams:" the Mets, Jets and Nets, (though the Mets' ruinous April-May clearly killed their season.) The Giants and Knicks - despite complete mediocrity - received far more attention than they deserved, and far more than the Jets and Nets.

But New York loves a winner. and in 2017, the Yankees gave the city the closest thing it had to a championship. I am once again reminded that the greatest city in America has only one winning sports legacy. Almost every sector of the country boasts at least one traditional sports power: Dallas, Pittsburgh and New England in the NFL; Alabama, USC, Ohio State and the perennial NCAA football factories; Duke, Kansas and the corrupt basketball conferences; etc. Across America, there are many fan bases that, if their teams lose just a few games all season, the year is a complete disaster. New York has only the Yankees.

I'm tempted to say that - with Giancarlo and Judge - the Yankees have already wrapped up the 2018 tabloids race. But a voice inside me says no, no, no. Somebody once said, "You cannot predict baseball," a line that I consider to be the greatest sports metaphor ever spoken about life. It also pertains to the tabs. 

But what a wonderful year it was! And what a wonderful readership this blog has. I thank you all for keeping me sane - no, actually, the opposite - and let's rally our volcanic, self-righteous indignation throughout 2018. Somebody has to keep Cooperstown Cashman in check. Folks, that's you.

6 comments:

  1. Well said, Duque.

    Me, I remain astonished as ever at how bad the advice offered in the tabs—and everywhere—is.

    It's always, "make a trade so I have something to write about." And almost always, "get rid of those kids for 'proven' veterans."

    We hear it now from way too many supposed fans:

    "Oh, the Yankees can't start a season in which they want to contend for the World Series with rookies at third AND second!"

    Of course they're right. Look at the 1951 Yanks, starting the season with rookies in right and at third. Why, all they did was win the Series in six. With one of the rookies being named rookie-of-the-year, and the other one...

    But never mind.

    Why learn anything from experience? Why expect that tomorrow's stars are guys who have sped up through the minor leagues, playing well everywhere? Why would THEY succeed?

    Nah. Everyone knows that the stars of the future spring up in cabbage patches, and are delivered to the Stadium by storks.

    In a game where it's all downhill after age 28, it's always better to go with "veterans," no matter how tired, injured, or just plain mediocre they are.

    Here's hoping that, for once, Coops will keep on ignoring the static.

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  2. Also, I still think we need a running count next year of Times stories on soccer v. Times stories on the Yankees.

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  3. IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A LANDSLIDE WIN OF BACK PAGES FOR US!

    WE SHOCKED NY BASEBALL, AND HAD A GREAT RUN.

    .....BUT MARK MY WORDS, IF THE METS WERE EVEN A .500 TEAM, THEY WOULD HAVE TOPPED US, OR MATCHED US IN THE DAILY NEWS, THEY HATE US.

    GREAT TO SEE THE METS LAY LIMP SO FAR THIS OFF SEASON.

    GREAT TO SEE THE RED SOX GO MORELAND INSTEAD OF HOSMER.

    THE STARS ALL SEEM TO BE ALIGNING TOWARD OUR DOMINANCE AGAIN.

    ONE THING CAN DERAIL IT.

    COOP.

    ONCE AGAIN, I'D LIKE TO THANK EL DUQUE, ALPHONSO, (AND THE REST OF THE CAST), FOR THE GREATEST YANKEE WEBSITE ON EARTH.

    THIS WONDERFUL SITE HAS PROBABLY SAVED ME THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN PSYCHIATRIC BILLS.

    TY ALL.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree, ALL-CAPS.

    And today TB trades Longoria to SF. Good to have him out of the division.

    The Mets were supposedly "talking" to TB about Longoria.

    I guess for the Mets, that means saying, "Hey, I hear you're trading Longoria to the Giants. Good luck!"

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  5. THE METS ARE ALWAYS "TALKING" TO SOMEBODY.

    WITH THE SAME GLORIOUS RESULTS.

    NOTHING.

    LONGORIA IS NOW OUT OF THE DIVISION.

    ALL OUR ENEMIES ARE SMOKED.

    ReplyDelete

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