Ten reasons to be terrified as the Yankees near a trade for Giancarlo Stanton

Dear God, why, why, WHY did he have to pick the Yankees? 

A month ago, all was calm, all was bright: Billy McKinney and Thairo Estrada had great fall seasons in the Arizona sand, we were faves to sign the Japanese Babe, Louis C.K. was a hero, and we were the team to beat in 2018. WE DIDN'T NEED THIS!

Now, if the rumor mill is true, the Yankees are about breakup their team, farm system and long term plans simply because Giancarlo Stanton put them on a short list of acceptable destinations, and the Marlins are so desperate to jettison the guy that they will lap dance in our face until we break down and grab the booty.  

Okay... I get it: We cannot condemn a deal that hasn't been made. There are variants of trades that could seem acceptable - especially to the naked eye - and we can't know what's real and what's Memorex until the details are in print. Last night, for example, some bozo was tweeting under the name "River Ave Blues" that a deal was done, until Mike Axisa said it was an impostor. (Probably a Putin-hired hired skateboarder in Macedonia.) There is talk of the Yankees bundling Headley, Ellsbury and/or Castro - (though Ellsbury has his own list of preferred destinations, and I doubt it includes Miami) - along with "second-tier" prospects. We don't know what's happening in the phone lines.

But as bloggers today begin the celebrations - (one actually said, "Christmas is coming early for Yankee fans!" Do you believe that? Are they that simple minded?)  Here are 10 reasons to be terrified. 

1. This deal looms as a carbon copy of the A-Rod pact from long ago, even down to the point where Stanton can opt out after a few years. It looks good going into 2018, but this contract will make him into a financial millstone for perhaps the rest of our lives. He will be the reason why Hal cannot sign countless free agents - even backup catchers and bullpen lug nuts. He will become the face of Yankee poverty, and we will die listening to Billionaire Hal whine about money. This is the last time Stanton will be traded. With that contract, he becomes a Yankee for life.  

2. Hey, we're right back to the old ways of bailing out small market teams for their mistakes. Remember when the Dodgers made that laughable deal for Kevin Brown? We snickered - nobody could blame the Yankees for out of control salaries - that is, until the Yankees traded for Kevin Brown. And how did that turn out? Once again, we're becoming the Final Destination for salary dumps - and the key word there is "dump."

3. Stanton is a walking pile of injuries. Last year's 159 games was an anomaly. He didn't even average 100 games in the two previous seasons. Coupled with Aaron Judge's shoulder, which was operated on this fall, we could end up with our two big hitters on the DL for extended stays. There is a reason Miami wants to get rid of him so badly.

4. Here we go, right back to the old ways of blocking prospects down the line. If you're Clint Frazier, Billy McKinney, Estevan Florial - all of them down to Charleston - why bother to think you'll ever play for the Yankees? Last year, this was one of the great parts of the Yankee resurgence: We became a team of young, rising stars - rather than a obese collection of big names. Are they really going to throw everything overboard and start again with the tired veterans?

5. If we do nothing - just don't answer the phone - we still go to spring training as favorite to win the AL East. We'd field an emerging, exciting team, perhaps with a few breakout stars that will capture the imagination of New York. But with Stanton, we are once again the overpaid slobs. We concede all the positive vibes of young players establishing themselves for the first time. Every team will be gunning for us, and if we're not 10 games in front, the writers will be savaging us. Instead of being overachievers, we'll be underachievers in the minds of the media - and that's how good teams collapse.

6. We're going to deal with Gary Denbo, who until two months ago was running our farm system. This alone should be a trade-killer. Whatever the Yankees tell us - how they've only given up "second tier" talent - Denbo will have gotten the players he wanted. You don't deal with the fox who's been sleeping in the hen house. 

7. All this talk about sending Ellsbury and/or Castro and/or Headley - while it makes sense this year - ignores the imponderable length of this deal. The Yankees told us we were done with these horrible long-term contracts. We accepted that Joggie Cano - who should have been a lifetime Yankee - would be cut loose rather than accept an insufferably bad pact. Now, we're going to take on this thing... through 2028?

8. The 2018 Yankees - with Stanton - will be a strikeout/home run lineup. Yes, they'll hit a lot of homers. Yes, they'll probably make the post-season. From there, can they homer their way to the series? I doubt it. In the face of good pitching, homer-happy teams fall apart. And Stanton has thus far lived in the media desert of Miami. Those 59 home runs he hit last year? They came on a terrible team, and none of them mattered in a real pennant race. That was the knock on A-Rod: He'd hit a home run in a 10-1 game. This guy has not been tested under the glare of New York City. 

9. He's another RH slugger. That means three middle-of-the-order righties, all prone to fan 200 times a season. From the left side - in Yankee Stadium, no less - we will have only Greg Bird and Didi. 

10. Under some of these rumors, this would result in Todd Frazier returning to play third. Listen: I came to like Frazier. He has a nice smile. He's a good guy, with the thumb-down and all. But he is the consummate player on the downward slope of a career, the .210 hitter who is not going to improve. Dear God, are we just down to the point where if a guy says he wants to play for the Yankees, we're supposed to sign him? 

This trade sets up a bunch of equations that could be disastrous. We don't need this. Dear God... why did he have to pick us?