It's time to start planning next year's Yankee World Series victory riot

On the morning after the Rose Bowl Parade, the people of Pasadena famously gather to brainstorm the next year's hideous orgy of dogmatic Disney commercialism. 

If we want to go viral next October, we must start NOW in planning our spontaneous Yankees Canyon of Heroes victory hell riot.

First, we need experienced climbers, folks who can scale the Statue of Liberty, and that's gonna be a somabitch, because you know Lady Liberty will be slathered in Crisco. Can we get those magnetic suction cup-thingys Tom Cruise used in Mission Impossible? If those things exist, we need a shitload. If we can drone 20 fat guys up to the torch, we could have that statue do a face plant, recreate the Charlton Heston finale from Planet of the Apes. That would show Liddle Philadelphia what we think of them dropping the Ritz-Carlton entrance. Ohh, what big time rioters you are... knocking down a hotel awning!

I say we clog Holland Tunnel with beer cans, top to bottom. Nobody gets in or out. We take a small crew, each one wearing a beer-icide vest full of 12-packs, and establish a party right in the middle. We form barricades from the empties and piss out through the holes. We hold our ground for a week, or until supplies last. That'll show the Mets who runs this town.

Empire State Building? We climb to the top, beat our chests and bat away planes. Trump Tower? If one story remains standing, we should riot in shame. With enough people, we should be able to push over the High Line. After that, I say we march north, topple the Tappan Zee, then finish by burning White Plains to the ground. I'm talking about a RIOT people, something that makes Philly's hell night look like a Sarah McLachlan concert. It's gonna be great!