Thursday, February 8, 2018

Signing Russell Wilson: Hubris or fun?

First, let's not go dueling Congressional memos over this: Yesterday's "trade" with Texas for Russell Wilson, the Seahawks Super Bowl QB, will likely be forgotten by the Ides of March (a great band, dammit; why aren't they in the Hall?) Its legacy will be a few bad punch lines about the Yanks having a better QB than the Mets (Tebow, get it?) and that Boston would sign Tom Brady, if only he could catch a ball. 

Last time the Evil Empire welcomed a spring training celebrity, it was Billy Crystal back in 2008, a sop to Old George, back when we were perennial faves. Our season ended the first week of October with Robby Cano aimlessly waving at a roller into right field, and here's what we have to remember. 
    


The Mets have twice floated spring celebrities. In 2000, Garth Brooks - or was it "Chris Gaines?" - tried out with the team. He actually did it three seasons, with the Mets, Royals and Padres - going a collective 2-42. And then there is pious Tim Tebow, 30, who hit .220 last season at low Single A, but packed the bleachers in Florida, where the yaybobs still remember when he was pitched to sire Katy Perry in sick eugenics fantasies. (Let's just say, the world dodged a bullet.)

So... Russell Wilson... good or bad? Hey, it's a democracy. You decide: 

1. Bad idea. Once again, folks, here it comes: pure, uncut, felony-grade Yankee hubris. This is exactly what we didn't want - the team opening camp as a self-anointed favorite, chock with celebrities, with that country club spirit that always goes nowhere. Remember last year's Redsock '17 Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny (TM)? Now it's our turn. They say Wilson will teach youngsters discipline. What a joke. What they'll see is the self-indulgence of celebrity, big money stars hobnobbing on and off the field. Last year, the lean and hungry Yankees had something to prove. This year, entourages! And have we forgotten what happens to "sure-things" in NYC? They get devoured by expectations. The call-in shows, the Gammonites, the - gulp - fan blogs. If the Yankees tank, do you know how many times I will scream about Russell Wilson? We have a rookie manager - a celebrity himself - and we are adding more fame? This is a huge mistake. Cashman, you suck!

2. Good idea. The baseball season - from mid-February to the edge of November - has become a marathon, eight-hours-of-Nancy-Pelosi-standing-up-in-high-heels grind. Whenever you can lighten the load, especially in spring, you should do it - especially with a positive role model like Wilson. The guy plays 2B. Imagine the excitement for Glyber Torres, Tyler Wade, Ronald Torreyes and Thairo Estrada as they work with Wilson, who unabashedly loves the game of baseball. He will remind everyone of how lucky they are to be playing a sport that isn't likely to leave them a doddering recluse in 20 years. Moreover, Wilson will siphon publicity from other players, lessening their stress. While the Gammonites pepper him with questions, the rest can go about their business. In the future, we should always recruit a stalking horse celebrity, just for the media. Everybody else can breathe easier. Wayta go, Cash! Say, have you lost weight?

Take your pick. Like I said, it probably won't matter - unless Wilson can convince Jacoby Ellsbury of the wonders of Seattle. In that case, maybe the Ides of March will take notice: (I love ya, need ya, want ya, got to have your child... GREAT GOD IN HEAVEN YOU KNOW I LO-UUUUVE YOU...!)

10 comments:

  1. Drew Henson worked out. *
    John Elway worked out. *
    Dante Culpepper worked out *


    * With the Yankees (and also at other fine sports facilities.)

    Doug K.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, but Henson and Elway were both big prospects.

    Don't know about Culpepper.

    Didn't Betty White work out with the team in 1993? Or was that Steve Kemp?

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  3. Meanwhile, the Times ran a Reuters graf and a big pic on soccer...but no story!

    And with the paper's riveting piece on the Wilson signing-plus-Girardi becoming an analyst...YES! We have a clear-cut Yankees win!

    This puts the year at Soccer 19, Yankees 4, and February at a mere Soccer 4, Yanks 3.

    The tension builds!

    ReplyDelete
  4. And very sweet to see the official sidebar!!

    I am deeply honored.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Been meaning to do it for a while.

    But mark my words: The Yankees will win this duel.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Maybe Wilson was the PTBNL in the Buhner deal.

    ReplyDelete
  7. It could be, Duque—and if they do, I think it will mean they've had a great year.

    But with the World Cup being played this year, I dunno...

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  8. I don't think it's a Bill Veeck type of stunt, but I can't figure it out.

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  9. "We can do anything Mets can do better"

    I'm sure John and Suzyn can sing that better than I...

    ReplyDelete

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    ReplyDelete

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