Tulo ( above ) takes a contemplative look at the "flash board," which recorded his latest forty yard dash time in Tampa ( 8.2 seconds).
He used to run a 4.4 forty but the aging process has seized up his muscles. That youthful "burst" has turned into a " slow seep."
Maybe he should have run in cleats instead of high top sneakers and cammo pants.
His range is down to about 1.5 feet going left, and 1.2 feet going to the right.
So he purchased a longer glove. " I call it the banana," says the newest Yankee shortstop.
When he shaves off the facial hair, he will look younger , he says. And it might add speed.
The purpose of the over-sized hat is to make him look sleeker and more fit.
" When I get in shape, I lose weight from the head down, " he mentioned.
Slow and old. Slow and old.
Defensive upgrades; this is not.
Nice work Brian.
https://www.thisisinsider.com/squirrel-devoured-an-egg-roll-in-new-york-2019-1?utm_content=buffer9bf28&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer-food&fbclid=IwAR1ktYraIUp1NtBtuk_m-JfnEj9n0VcSdVvin2Y4iVzRPnC36yEJU_G579Y
ReplyDeleteStill better than same age Jeter on defense though, right? LOL
ReplyDeleteI seem to recall we could have had Troy when he was good but Jeter was still clogging up SS and we had no real place for him, so we let him go to the Blue Jays or something to that effect. That move looks really good now in hindsight.
I just hate how the Yanks love to get over-ripe players that they so envied in years prior. Sure, we'll get Manny...in 2025 when he's hitting a robust .223 and a negative defensive war at a cost of just under 1 million a year.
This is reaching Python-like levels of satire, in its fake solemnity. Next Troy will be assuring us that he violated the unwritten law.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I smell promotional gold! Now, instead of just getting to run around the bases as they do after minor-league games, young Yankees fans can race against Troy!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I thought he had already retired, or was like dead or something!?
ReplyDeleteHe’s so old that he has to tuck his scrotum into his socks when he gets dressed.
ReplyDeleteReally? How old is he?
ReplyDeleteHe's 432 years old, but that's in Earth years. He's not that old on his home planet.
ReplyDelete
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