My Favorite Episode Of The Love Boat Was When Jennifer Steinbrenner Donated Money To Cover The Emergency Surgery For The Passenger Played By Vic Tayback
And that, Anonymous, is why the vast majority of people who had cable 5 years ago still have cable. And people who no longer have cable have Hulu, for instance, which carries YES, at least locally in and around the city. Then there's Fox Sports Now, or whatever it's called, that lets you stream the games.
Also, ratings services are still catching up to digital viewers. They're getting there, though.
So along with Love Boat reruns, a lot of people are watching Yankees games, I think. If only Jennifer would help out with the team, there would probably be more.
If Vic Tayback was our manager viewership would go through the roof.
So five out of nine guys in the lineup are in horrific slumps. Sanchez is a disaster, Eddie looks awful, Brett and Didi and Gio...oh my.
If we survive today, it'll be y miracle. Good thing we left all those other guys off the roster and kept Mr. Gonad in case we need a key pinch hit strikeout late in the game.
I am already sated and drunk on sushi and wine. I am watching. But I will not hope. I will not love. My heart is closed, like a secret garden. I am here for you Bill. And you Duque. And Hoss and bitty and 'Phonso. Not for the Yankees who have cruelly wrenched and torn at my heart.
I have emerged from my week-long dip into the Film du Look school and found it to be pretty much a style-over-substance thing that was probably interesting in the early 1980s but doesn’t hold up (with the exception of Beineix’s three-hour cut of “37°2 let matin”). For a palate cleanser I’ve had “You Can’t Take It With You” on but I guess I may switch it off and have a look at the doings in Texas. Missed you all last night. Geez – they win the game I decided to not watch.
Oh shit! Given the unpredictability of Juju (and the punishing treatment of the Juju Gods), maybe I should just stick to Frank Capra for the next four hours…
Encarnacion back to his old ALCS self. Doesn't Boone know we've won all games Glassy Stanton has played in the playoffs this year and lost all those he hasn't?
Actually, I think that could be a GREAT World Series. Houston truly does have a terrific team—another sign of a good team? Look at how many different guys are stepping up for them: Altuve, Springer, Correa, Gurriel, pitchers like Peacock, who looks like he could pitch a complete-game no-hitter—and Washington has the one pitching staff that might be able to shut it down.
Hey, Didi got us our hit, at least. The Yanks are such awful natural hitters now that I always fear, when they play any good team, that they could be no-hit.
One thing: I don't expect a major-league team to act like a high-school varsity. And I realize that that 3-run homer was very, very bad.
But could it be possible for Ma Boone to get the guys up and looking determined still, and not like their best friend just died? I'm tired unto death of all those TV shots of Judge and Torres looking as shellshocked as if they just got off the line at Verdun.
If I ran a baseball team I’d ask the company that makes the Peyronie’s Disease pills to sponsor the foul poles. I’d also sell John Sterling action figures with a pull string.
If only there had been a decent pitcher we could have picked up for only cash, no prospects, a few months ago, all this might have been different. Too bad NO ONE WAS AVAILABLE. Not. One. Pitcher. Nobody better than Happ or Green. Such a shame that the market was so thin this year. All it would have taken would have been some money from Hal, but he's poor. He's on food stamps. He put all of his money in Stanton.
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU - HAL, BRIAN, RANDY, ROTHFUCK ET AL
Jesus Mary and Joseph hangin’ off the cross: I had to check out the reference to understand what Peyronie's disease is. The photos on Wikipedia have ruined my night! Holy shit! Almost spit my Remy Martin VSOP on my keyboard.
I mean, even if there HAD been even one good pitcher available in August, we could not have gotten him. We're a poor team, after all. Sucks being in a small market and having no money. Luckily, we have great baseball minds on the team and they realized that we have everything we need in house. What a fucking relief that is.
I know. Absolutely no way Dallas Keuchel was coming to a team like the Yankees for a few more bucks (as if we had it!).
And thank goodness we didn't try to tempt lifelong Yankees fan Patrick Corbin with a contract. Why, if that were the case we might even have the chance to win the World Series.
Rufus, if you want to test your ability to avoid spewing good liquor on your keyboard, have a look at: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Induratio_penis_plastica
Rufus: blame Bill White (He Is) for bringing up the dreaded disease in the first place. And he seems to have subsequently disappeared; maybe he checked out the Wikipedia page.
The ridiculous thing is that the Yankees are all pressing as if they are five runs down in the ninth, all swinging for the fences. They're trailing by one, against a gaggle of relievers. Maybe, just maybe, you could bunch together a double and a single? No?
Why whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy always the first pitch swinging on a new pitcher????
Maybe the guy doesn't have his touch tonight. Maybe he can't find the plate. Maybe he'll miss twice and sail a nice, big, fat one right into your wheelhouse.
This is the time of year—always, or at least for the last 20 years—when the very sight of the Yankees batters begins to disgust me.
When I know that even when they are only down a run or two, it is insurmountable.
When the desperation oozes out of their very eyeballs.
When they are obviously straining too hard, swinging too wild, trying always to win everything with one swing of the bat. Really, it's when I just can't stand to see them up there anymore.
I am too old, and can still remember The cool, inscrutable confidence of a Paul O'Neill Showing that he could foul off Benitez's pitches until the end of time. Derek Jeter, happy to be up there, probing for weak spots like a surgeon with his scalpel. Reggie like the warhorse, crying ha-ha at the next pitch he sees.
Sweet Rufus: I was merely trying to understand honourable Bill White's reference. That was not an example of my poor taste. Should I ever purposefully unleash it you'll know!
And they were out of Courvoisier VSOP at the 25% sale (and it would have been my first choice); the Remy was the only VSOP on the shelf (and I still saved about €12).
Here comes "tree trunk legs" Tommy! (An announcer's quote; NOT mine!")
What I don't fuckin like is this worthless fuckin offense.... how incompetent do you have to be to continue to swing for the fence when you're only down one run against a fucking bullpen which can be had....it's not like the stros have Dennis fucking eckerslly out there...damn ....fuck cashman
Hoss, despite his repeated public endorsement of your current President, I still have an autographed O'Neill #21 baseball (from the 2001 World Series) in a case on my desk, two T-shirts (short sleeve/long sleeve), three baseball cards (one autographed), and a signed photo of him topping a team victory pile-up. In my years in NYC I LOVED him, as did all the patrons at the Irish pub which was my second home. Last time I saw him (playing) was in September 2001 (haven't been to the USA since 2003, and off-season at that)
Gary sucks for long stretches of time, then does enough good things to get on everyone's good graces for a while...then promptly goes back to sucking again. He's Greg Bird work more home runs
Cheap ownership, moronic front office, bad field managing, bad conditioning staff, no real baseball wisdom, a bunch of retreads and some guys with heart who are not being given a shot, even though they got us here. I always think - even though the song was about a dumb boyfriend - of the Blondie song titled "No Imagination." Boone and Cash could not think outside of the box to save their lives. Robotic, predictable choices. Nothing inspired going on here. And Stanton? He'd have done better if his manager or he had decided to sit out the rest of this season. I already hated him, but I was ready to give him a pass. He has done a lot of damage in the past week to his already soiled reputation. In fact, I'll kind of hate his guts forever unless he singlehandedly comes back next year and leads us to a World Series victory. What are the chances of that happening?
And Cashman won't take responsibility or pay for this debacle. He'll come away unscathed, as usual.
What went on with Stanton is beyond belief—really unprecedented.
It's one thing to get injured. It's one thing to slump.
It's another thing altogether to be unable to go but unwilling—and un-ordered—to give up your spot on the roster. I cannot think of another ballplayer in the history of this team that was so selfish.
JM, I'm with you. I'm going to bed. Good night, Otto, turn out the lights after you blow it up. I guess that Boone doesn't realize there are six outs left in the season and Ottavino, with his 20.25 ERA in the post season, is in to deal with it. ARE THEY FUCKING IDIOTS???????????
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And that, Anonymous, is why the vast majority of people who had cable 5 years ago still have cable. And people who no longer have cable have Hulu, for instance, which carries YES, at least locally in and around the city. Then there's Fox Sports Now, or whatever it's called, that lets you stream the games.
ReplyDeleteAlso, ratings services are still catching up to digital viewers. They're getting there, though.
So along with Love Boat reruns, a lot of people are watching Yankees games, I think. If only Jennifer would help out with the team, there would probably be more.
If Vic Tayback was our manager viewership would go through the roof.
"Heller had a 1.23 ERA and nine strikeouts in 7 1/3 innings for the Yankees this season after returning from Tommy John surgery."
ReplyDeleteMy apologies for calling Heller a disparaging name. He may be our key to winning tonight.
I WISH HAL WOULD PAY HARD ATTENTION TO THOSE PICTURES IN THE BACKGROUND.
ReplyDeleteWow, no Stanton. AGAIN. Time to pull the trigger, put Tauchman on the roster. Honestly!
ReplyDeleteHal doesn't care, ALL-CAPS. He doesn't care. That's all we need to know. Money, yes. Yankees victories? not so much. He's a dick.
ReplyDeleteThey're saving Stanton for the world series, the one that no yankees will play in.
ReplyDeleteThe eyes of Texas are upon you
ReplyDeleteAll the live long days
The eyes of Texas are upon you
And you cannot get away
Do not think you can escape them
From night till early in the morn
The eyes of Texas are upon you
Till Gabriel blows his horn
So five out of nine guys in the lineup are in horrific slumps. Sanchez is a disaster, Eddie looks awful, Brett and Didi and Gio...oh my.
ReplyDeleteIf we survive today, it'll be y miracle. Good thing we left all those other guys off the roster and kept Mr. Gonad in case we need a key pinch hit strikeout late in the game.
John just mentioned that it is Happ's birthday today. He just turned 67. Good thing he's signed for another year.
ReplyDeleteIt's good to hear that I'm still younger than at least one major league player.
ReplyDeleteI am already sated and drunk on sushi and wine. I am watching. But I will not hope. I will not love. My heart is closed, like a secret garden. I am here for you Bill. And you Duque. And Hoss and bitty and 'Phonso. Not for the Yankees who have cruelly wrenched and torn at my heart.
ReplyDeleteLove you all, my Babies ...
Fuck you all.
Aaron Hicks just said our bullpen is our strength. He must've missed a few games when he was in the whirlpool.
ReplyDeleteGod, Winnie, now I want sushi. Damn.
Bad enough to listen to Buck and Smoltz, do they have to be on camera, too?
ReplyDeleteRosenthal is a rodent.
ReplyDeleteI have emerged from my week-long dip into the Film du Look school and found it to be pretty much a style-over-substance thing that was probably interesting in the early 1980s but doesn’t hold up (with the exception of Beineix’s three-hour cut of “37°2 let matin”). For a palate cleanser I’ve had “You Can’t Take It With You” on but I guess I may switch it off and have a look at the doings in Texas. Missed you all last night. Geez – they win the game I decided to not watch.
ReplyDeleteOh shit! Given the unpredictability of Juju (and the punishing treatment of the Juju Gods), maybe I should just stick to Frank Capra for the next four hours…
And that was the part of the order that can hit.
ReplyDeleteHoo boy.
I just watched "You Can't Take It With You" the other day for the millionth time. It was still great. Unlike our lineup.
ReplyDeleteAJ Hinch picked Brad Peacock because he has a slow heartbeat.
ReplyDeleteTom Verducci
John Sterling's voice is in a very good timbre tonight. He is a man's man. A true professional. Suzyn also on top of the rock pile.
ReplyDeleteWtf is Green doing? Buzz em, already.
ReplyDeleteThe Houston fans are such incredible yahoos. What amazing hicks.
ReplyDeleteWarbler! Get ahold of yourself!
ReplyDeleteI want you to stand up. I want you to go over to the window. I want you to TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS AND PUT THEM ON YOUR HEAD!
You know, if clutch existed, I would say that Altuve is the most clutch player in the game today.
ReplyDeleteIf it existed.
ReplyDeleteGreen is not pitching in a Greenlike way.
ReplyDelete3-0. Fuck.
I wonder who had Green pitching so differently than the way he's effective?
ReplyDeleteGee, who could that be?
Why on earth did this team turn into pumpkins they moment they step into the other orange juice arena?
ReplyDeleteWell THAT was depressing.
ReplyDeleteYeah, JM, I was thinking the same thing. I was going to say, if he gets through the first inning, the Yanks should pull him then.
But he didn't get through the first inning.
Well, what to say? A paper-thin pitching staff, finally giving way.
If Yul Brenner had been a Yankee, would we be calling him Yuli?
ReplyDeleteJM: I have a huge collection of Capra - one of my favourites as director and as a writer for others.
Speaking of ratings, a Houston-Washington Series should set new records for people watching Will & Grace reruns.
ReplyDeleteCapra movies are incredibly satisfying.
ReplyDeleteEncarnacion back to his old ALCS self. Doesn't Boone know we've won all games Glassy Stanton has played in the playoffs this year and lost all those he hasn't?
ReplyDeleteDidi breaks out, Sanchez will strand him. Of course.
ReplyDeleteActually, I think that could be a GREAT World Series. Houston truly does have a terrific team—another sign of a good team? Look at how many different guys are stepping up for them: Altuve, Springer, Correa, Gurriel, pitchers like Peacock, who looks like he could pitch a complete-game no-hitter—and Washington has the one pitching staff that might be able to shut it down.
ReplyDeleteWill Gary strike out looking or swinging?
ReplyDeleteOr perhaps we'll be pleasantly surprised and it'll be a foul tip
Holy shit, he got a hit!!!
ReplyDeleteCapra was a Chemical engineer. Was famous for something else though.
ReplyDeleteWow, a two out hit!
ReplyDeleteWith runners in scoring position?!
What the fuck is going on??????
Hoss, 98% of the country doesn't give a crap about those teams. They're not where the money is for TV.
ReplyDeleteHey, Didi got us our hit, at least. The Yanks are such awful natural hitters now that I always fear, when they play any good team, that they could be no-hit.
ReplyDeleteAnd boy, yeah, that was wild.
ReplyDeleteWell, say what we will about Sanchez, at least he's playing. Unlike, um, someone we could name.
And all this with two out.
ReplyDeleteIf Dunkin' Donuts is now just Dunkin', what are they dunking? Makes no sense to me.
ReplyDeleteOne thing: I don't expect a major-league team to act like a high-school varsity. And I realize that that 3-run homer was very, very bad.
ReplyDeleteBut could it be possible for Ma Boone to get the guys up and looking determined still, and not like their best friend just died?
I'm tired unto death of all those TV shots of Judge and Torres looking as shellshocked as if they just got off the line at Verdun.
This is Brett’s moment,
ReplyDeleteAnd he whiffs.
ReplyDeleteI'm so old I remember when Gardner had a neck.
Really, I meant it.
ReplyDeleteStrike two was a couple inches inside.
ReplyDeleteStrike three was three inches outside.
Umpire sucks. They have been told to let the ASSholtros win.
Bad calls. But on the second one, it's close, you know the ump is giving in to the crowd...you gotta try to at least foul it off.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely stiffed by the umpire. Ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteHapp.
ReplyDeleteThe fucking umps call call pitches OUTSIDE and INSIDE strikes.
ReplyDeletePICK A FUCKING STRIKE ZONE ASSHOLES!
I know I should have watched the zombie movie.
A cruel joke from the Juju Gods: The Curse of The 1s
ReplyDeleteYankees’ score: 1
Gardner’s #: 11
Gardner’s average: .111
Sorry for the stuttering, but I am FUCKING PISSED OFF!
ReplyDeleteIf I ran a baseball team I’d ask the company that makes the Peyronie’s Disease pills to sponsor the foul poles. I’d also sell John Sterling action figures with a pull string.
ReplyDeleteIf only there had been a decent pitcher we could have picked up for only cash, no prospects, a few months ago, all this might have been different. Too bad NO ONE WAS AVAILABLE. Not. One. Pitcher. Nobody better than Happ or Green. Such a shame that the market was so thin this year. All it would have taken would have been some money from Hal, but he's poor. He's on food stamps. He put all of his money in Stanton.
ReplyDeleteFUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU - HAL, BRIAN, RANDY, ROTHFUCK ET AL
Who is that fat pig ump? Same fucking pitch to an ASSholetro is a fucking ball.
ReplyDeleteStupid excuse for bad calls by the umps.
ReplyDeleteIs being morbidly obese a requirement for being an MLB ump?
ReplyDelete13bit,
ReplyDeleteI don't remember any pitchers being available. None that would play for food stamps anyway.
At least HAL got that new satellite TV for his yacht.
"Is being morbidly obese a requirement for being an MLB ump?"
ReplyDeleteNo, but it helps getting you picked for playoff series. Bad eyesight is a lucky bonus.
Bill White,
ReplyDeleteThe foul poles would need to favor the yankees. Rotated each half inning.
I'm not wearing pants. On my head or anywhere really ...
ReplyDeleteLet me picture that for a minute....
ReplyDeleteYeah. Yeah, that was worth it.
Two outs, two on, and no-hit Eddie.
Pants are overrated.
ReplyDeleteDamn, looked like Hicks ALMOST got that one.
ReplyDeleteI want that Sterling action figure. A great Christmas gift.
ReplyDeleteWalk, Eddie.
ReplyDeleteWow, he walked The Parrot. That was a gift.
ReplyDeleteI have a good feeling about Sir Didi tonight!
ReplyDeleteWhat is Birdman doing there? I though he was benched for this game?
ReplyDeleteFuck!
ReplyDeleteOh Didi, my Didi! Our fearful trip is done—I fear.
ReplyDeleteFirst pitch? From a new pitcher? And not a big meatball straight down the pike?
Oy.
I have run out of ways to say "FUCK!".
ReplyDeleteGame over. Cessa is warming.
ReplyDeleteDidi ain't coming back. How many men are they leaving on base tonight? 18 is my bet. They score 2 and leave 18 on base.
ReplyDeleteYou think they'll score that many?
ReplyDeleteThat's very optimistic.
Well, at least we got Pressley out of there. Return to sender!!
ReplyDeleteJesus Mary and Joseph hangin’ off the cross: I had to check out the reference to understand what Peyronie's disease is. The photos on Wikipedia have ruined my night! Holy shit! Almost spit my Remy Martin VSOP on my keyboard.
ReplyDeleteFUCK YOU HAL AND MAY YOU GET PEYRONIE’S DISEASE!
I mean, even if there HAD been even one good pitcher available in August, we could not have gotten him. We're a poor team, after all. Sucks being in a small market and having no money. Luckily, we have great baseball minds on the team and they realized that we have everything we need in house. What a fucking relief that is.
ReplyDeleteI know. Absolutely no way Dallas Keuchel was coming to a team like the Yankees for a few more bucks (as if we had it!).
ReplyDeleteAnd thank goodness we didn't try to tempt lifelong Yankees fan Patrick Corbin with a contract. Why, if that were the case we might even have the chance to win the World Series.
AoBF,
ReplyDeletePlease do not commit alcohol abuse by wasting it on your keyboard. If you must, as least pick some cheap rot-gut. Aged a respectable 20 hours.
The most happy fella!!!!
ReplyDeleteGi-o-o-o!
ReplyDeleteGIO!
13bit - you're running close to overstepping your Irony Allotment for the night.
ReplyDeleteOh so close.
ReplyDeleteWhat is the name of the fat fuck home plate ump?
ReplyDeleteGio's full name is Giovanny - I guess it would be too confusing it we had a Giovanny and a Giancarlo.
ReplyDeleteFUCKING reCAPTCHA is making me go through 10 or more screens! And I'm not even though my first Remy!
Now the strike zone as apparently completely random. Fucking ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteUmp stinks.
ReplyDeleteAOBF, try just clicking Publish. That works for me, I just sign in then.
Rufus, if you want to test your ability to avoid spewing good liquor on your keyboard, have a look at: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Induratio_penis_plastica
ReplyDeleteHoustonians! Lock your doors! There is a lion on the loose!
ReplyDeleteCessi did just fine.
ReplyDeleteAoBF,
ReplyDeleteLast link you post that I'll ever look at.
And it was not alcohol that was in danger of covering my keyboard, it was bile and stomach acid.
I survived, but DON'T EVER FUCKING DO THAT AGAIN!
And I mean that in the nicest possible way.
And now your hopes (not mine! I have none!) rest on Lou Cessa. Lou fucking Cessa.
ReplyDeleteFuck you Hal. Fuck fuck fuck fuck you Hal.
It irks me that they cannot hit Urquiddy.
ReplyDeleteHoss, there is so much here that irks the the fuckin' bejeezus outta me.
ReplyDeleteHicks and Ed, K-men.
ReplyDeleteThe silver lining of our imminent departure from the playoffs is that I shall never have to watch The Parrot hit again.
ReplyDeleteUrkel? Fucking Urkel?
ReplyDeleteC'mon guys, have a fucking gonad!
Hoss, keep talkin' like that and soon you'll slander Verlander.
ReplyDeleteI like it. Catchy.
ReplyDeleteThat fat load bunted? Any is safe?
ReplyDeleteAnd is safe.
ReplyDeleteSanchez not hustling. Again.
Yep, he's safe. Because Sanchez took so long with that ball.
ReplyDeleteIt is absolutely obscene how bad EE has gotten since Minnesota
ReplyDeleteToo bad Carlton is no longer on the roster. Good time for a designated hitter.
ReplyDeleteFucking ASSholetros!
Another bad ball call.
ReplyDeleteRufus: blame Bill White (He Is) for bringing up the dreaded disease in the first place. And he seems to have subsequently disappeared; maybe he checked out the Wikipedia page.
ReplyDeleteDidn't cost us. But we're back to Didi failing to connect against this mediocrity.
ReplyDeleteOK,
ReplyDeleteTheir guy bunts for a hit.
Yankees have Sir Didi up with the overshift on.
Gee a bunt hit would nice there...
AND FUCKING EASY!.
Naw....
Just swing for the fences on every pitch.
The ridiculous thing is that the Yankees are all pressing as if they are five runs down in the ninth, all swinging for the fences. They're trailing by one, against a gaggle of relievers. Maybe, just maybe, you could bunch together a double and a single? No?
ReplyDeleteGio is hitting. Gardy is hitting, that liner notwithstanding.
ReplyDelete“Didi’s been off his game a little bit.” Oh, for the infinite wisdom of the Fox announcers!
ReplyDeleteContact hitting, that is.
ReplyDeleteDang. And of course, Sancho managed to alertly stroll back to second on that one.
ReplyDeleteFox Sports is as vile as Fox News.
ReplyDeleteMistake to pull Irky. We were doing nothing with him, that Texas Leaguer and Gardy's sinking pop fly notwithstanding. Who knows what you'll get next?
ReplyDeleteDJ not doing it tonight.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone else hear the fan chants?
ReplyDeleteDoesn't it sound like "Let's go, ASSHOLES!"?
And AoBF, Bill White is one of the elder statesmen here, I would never blame him for your poor taste.
And I won't even get into the Courvoisier vs. Remy part, except to say Courvoisier for VSOP, Remy for VS.
Oh Gardy: you been robbed!
ReplyDeleteWhy whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy always the first pitch swinging on a new pitcher????
ReplyDeleteMaybe the guy doesn't have his touch tonight. Maybe he can't find the plate. Maybe he'll miss twice and sail a nice, big, fat one right into your wheelhouse.
Nope. First pitch every time.
There IS no such thing as clutch.
ReplyDeleteAt least for the Yankees in this series.
A billion chances, give or take a couple
ReplyDeleteAre they under orders to swing at the first pitch regardless of where it is?
ReplyDeleteHoss,
ReplyDeleteBetter ask Bud Dry.
At least Otto seams to be chained to a chair in the clubhouse.
ReplyDeleteOoh. Look what happened when he didn't swing at the first pitch of the new pitcher.
ReplyDeleteThis is the time of year—always, or at least for the last 20 years—when the very sight of the Yankees batters begins to disgust me.
ReplyDeleteWhen I know that even when they are only down a run or two, it is insurmountable.
When the desperation oozes out of their very eyeballs.
When they are obviously straining too hard, swinging too wild, trying always to win everything with one swing of the bat. Really, it's when I just can't stand to see them up there anymore.
I am too old, and can still remember
The cool, inscrutable confidence of a Paul O'Neill
Showing that he could foul off Benitez's pitches until the end of time.
Derek Jeter, happy to be up there, probing for weak spots like a surgeon with his scalpel.
Reggie like the warhorse, crying ha-ha at the next pitch he sees.
These guys
Don't have it.
Kahnle wanted to know "where the fuck was that?" on ball four.
ReplyDeleteKahnle sucking. We're dead.
ReplyDeleteSweet Rufus: I was merely trying to understand honourable Bill White's reference. That was not an example of my poor taste. Should I ever purposefully unleash it you'll know!
ReplyDeleteAnd they were out of Courvoisier VSOP at the 25% sale (and it would have been my first choice); the Remy was the only VSOP on the shelf (and I still saved about €12).
Here comes "tree trunk legs" Tommy! (An announcer's quote; NOT mine!")
What I don't fuckin like is this worthless fuckin offense.... how incompetent do you have to be to continue to swing for the fence when you're only down one run against a fucking bullpen which can be had....it's not like the stros have Dennis fucking eckerslly out there...damn ....fuck cashman
ReplyDeleteGod this ump sucks.
ReplyDeleteSo...the strategy was to concede that run?
ReplyDeleteI don't get it.
That was a stupid play. Oh, Didi.
ReplyDeleteWord has it holds that Ellsbury will come in at the top of the ninth for a 3 run Homer to save the day and give Yanks a lead...
ReplyDeleteAnother bad call.
ReplyDeleteJesus the ump sucks.
ReplyDeleteAoBF,
ReplyDeleteUnderstood. Sometimes you need to go with the cards you're dealt.
Another passed ball.
ReplyDeleteGary is still scary.
ReplyDeleteHow many Sanchez mistakes can we afford?
ReplyDeleteThe Sanchino sucks as a catcher!!
ReplyDeleteCan I tell you how much I absolutely despise Gary Sanchez?
ReplyDeleteHoss, despite his repeated public endorsement of your current President, I still have an autographed O'Neill #21 baseball (from the 2001 World Series) in a case on my desk, two T-shirts (short sleeve/long sleeve), three baseball cards (one autographed), and a signed photo of him topping a team victory pile-up. In my years in NYC I LOVED him, as did all the patrons at the Irish pub which was my second home. Last time I saw him (playing) was in September 2001 (haven't been to the USA since 2003, and off-season at that)
ReplyDeleteLyon and Otto up.
ReplyDeleteWe're so dead.
Can they get anything for Sanchez in the offseason and resign Romine?
ReplyDeletePaulie has the IQ of a brick but he could play ball.
ReplyDeleteWow, Gary held onto strike three!
ReplyDeleteWill wonders never cease?
Gary sucks for long stretches of time, then does enough good things to get on everyone's good graces for a while...then promptly goes back to sucking again. He's Greg Bird work more home runs
ReplyDeleteWith, you fucking autocorrect
ReplyDeleteWe're lucky that was Alvarez at the plate
ReplyDelete...any other ASStro and it would be 6 - 2
ReplyDeleteAnother bad call.
ReplyDeleteHey Ho! Hey Ho! ICS has GOT TO GO
ReplyDeleteCheap ownership, moronic front office, bad field managing, bad conditioning staff, no real baseball wisdom, a bunch of retreads and some guys with heart who are not being given a shot, even though they got us here. I always think - even though the song was about a dumb boyfriend - of the Blondie song titled "No Imagination." Boone and Cash could not think outside of the box to save their lives. Robotic, predictable choices. Nothing inspired going on here. And Stanton? He'd have done better if his manager or he had decided to sit out the rest of this season. I already hated him, but I was ready to give him a pass. He has done a lot of damage in the past week to his already soiled reputation. In fact, I'll kind of hate his guts forever unless he singlehandedly comes back next year and leads us to a World Series victory. What are the chances of that happening?
And Cashman won't take responsibility or pay for this debacle. He'll come away unscathed, as usual.
Judge gets lucky. Nice leap.
ReplyDeleteThey are now referring to it as “Kahnle’s lower half” (!!!).
ReplyDeleteHome plate ump is on drugs!
ReplyDeleteYes, but our leading power hitter managed to get a single off an infielder's glove anyway. Whoopee!
ReplyDeleteTorres, now, swinging like a maniac.
Bit, you is correct.
ReplyDeleteOttazero warming up...bad sign
ReplyDeleteOtto up. So is my blood pressure.
ReplyDeleteAnother quality AB. God, I miss those patient teams of the '90s.
ReplyDeleteIf Otto pitches with a guy on base, I'm taking my crossword and going to bed.
ReplyDeleteLiterally swinging at every pitch. What's the mound visit for? "Just pitch it anywhere."
ReplyDeleteAs Elvis sang - someone mentioned Elvis earlier, I believe, in the haze and fog of war - "IT'S NOW OR NEVER...."
ReplyDelete“Lead-off man is on!” (And they neglected to mention it’s Judge).
ReplyDeleteWish I could sync up with WFAN but it’s too complicated to do it with my computer.
Double play.
ReplyDeleteWe're very dead.
And Eddie leads off next inning.
Finding new ways to fuck up every inning.
ReplyDeleteFuck me!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteNobody knows how to run bases any more...
ReplyDeleteThis is pointless. I'm quitting.
ReplyDeleteSee you all tomorrow for the wake.
DICKWADS, DOUCHEBAGS, FUCKFACES, ASSHOLES, SHITFUCKS, ASSWIPES, SCUMSUCKING DILDOES, SCHMUCKS, JERKS, MORONS, SHIT, DICKS, DIRTBAGS, ASSFUCKS, PATHETIC FUCKS...
ReplyDeleteWhat went on with Stanton is beyond belief—really unprecedented.
ReplyDeleteIt's one thing to get injured. It's one thing to slump.
It's another thing altogether to be unable to go but unwilling—and un-ordered—to give up your spot on the roster. I cannot think of another ballplayer in the history of this team that was so selfish.
And...Mr. Zero is in. Shutdown is imminent.
ReplyDeleteJM, I'm with you. I'm going to bed. Good night, Otto, turn out the lights after you blow it up. I guess that Boone doesn't realize there are six outs left in the season and Ottavino, with his 20.25 ERA in the post season, is in to deal with it. ARE THEY FUCKING IDIOTS???????????
ReplyDeleteI want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswagglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, and Methodists!
ReplyDeleteall on crystal meth, Rufus... Bull Dykes on crystal meth with sledge hammers...
ReplyDelete...and contact hitters
ReplyDeleteStupid roofs...
ReplyDeleteOtto, go back to driving Bart's bus!
ReplyDeleteNobody left, Bitty. Nobody left. 13 pitchers, and no one to trust.
ReplyDeleteToo bad we can't play the ALCS in a real park, where balls don't hit off guide wires and such.
Baseball should not be played in stadiums where fly balls can hit fucking girders.
ReplyDeleteI'm having flashbacks to Tampa.
ReplyDelete13bit - you missed ROSETTENSCHLEMMER: as best as I can, it's "gourmet of licking assholes." My multilingual vocabulary knows no bounds.
ReplyDelete“One of the best double-plays in ALCS history.” Really? Fuck Fox and their puss-oozing announcers.
(Sorry but CAPTCHA is giving me a ten minute delay!)
I think the home plate ump is a bull dyke. Sounds like a woman...
ReplyDeleteOttazero survived
ReplyDeleteFunny, they're down 2 runs, and they are absolutely dead. Dead as a mackerel.
ReplyDeleteAll they can think to do is hope they somehow hit two mammoth home runs.
What was the rally against Pedro in 2003? Double, single, double, double, I think and...presto whammo...three runs!
But what would the algorithm say?
Ok. six outs left. It's time.
ReplyDeleteThese guys either get an erection and get it done or we start talking about Hal's next big non-move after the winter meetings.
I'm getting into bed, but will check in from my iPad. It's been a fun run, folks. see you around the ranch. time to buy a Nats hat for real on Amazon.
So, who hits the solo home run to give us false hope? To tease us? I'm betting on Encarnacion.
ReplyDeleteHouston weather:
ReplyDelete79 degrees, clear, 5 mph wind.
WHY IS THE FUCKING ROOF CLOSED?
FUCK YOU HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN OUT FOR TRYING TO GET AN ADVANTAGE FROM LEAVING THE ROOF CLOSED!
AOB - Nobody does those compound words better than the Germans. Grand, powerful, dynamic and always a mouthful. I'm obviously not in bed yet.
ReplyDeleteNo Nats hat here, I'd rather binge-watch Schitt's Creek!
ReplyDeleteBye Bye EE! Nice knowing you. Another sack of shit down the toilet.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely pathetic.
ReplyDeleteOK, so it's not going to be EE, who has been completely worthless.
ReplyDeleteit's part of my last-ditch reverse juju strategy, Suzyn's Bitch...
ReplyDeleteAoBF,
ReplyDeleteYou are really giving the fox a(sshole)nnouncers way too much credit.
They are not nearly that good.
Nice last at-bat as a Yankee, Didi! See you in Seattle!
ReplyDelete