Existential Question: Does it matter that Aaron Judge's girlfriend was arrested?

You may have heard that Aaron Judge's girlfriend - name unimportant - was recently nabbed for "extreme DUI" in Arizona. (This actually happened in February, but the news just surfaced last week.) In normal times, such an event would rightfully go unnoticed across the Yankiverse. But without the daily avalanche of scores and tweaked gonads, it passes as an actual news tidbit. 

Hence, our Existential Yankee Question of the Day: 

If a girlfriend gets into trouble, does it reflect on the player?

The answer includes several caveats. 

1. If by "trouble," you mean homicide, genocide - actually anything involving a "cide" - the player will be tinged by the soil of scandal. This is unfortunate but unavoidable. Felony-grade actions, involving death and destruction, are hard to overlook, even if it involves a Yankee. 

2. If a girlfriend is linked to a Redsock player, absolutely! She must be held accountable! The list of scandal-accessible Redsock links includes family members, hangers-on, buddy bros, one-night stands, household pets and next door neighbors. Also, the mere notion of a girlfriend begs one immediate question: WTF is she doing with him?  

3. If the girlfriend is linked to a Yankee, it gets complicated. 

3a. If he's hot and leading the team in an important category, then whatever the girlfriend has been doing, it's working. Who are we to judge? She's good for him. She's helping him. Besides, we cannot dismiss the possibility that she was set up by Yankee-hating cops. A key here: It happened in Arizona, where hatred for the Yankees burns hotter than a billion suns. Never forget how, moments after they won the 2001 World Series, the Diamondbacks mockingly played "New York, New York" on the stadium p.a. system. Can we ever believe anything that happens in that godforsaken hellhole?

3b. If the Yankee is slumping, or if he simply went 0-5 last night, then the girlfriend needs to answer some critical questions: What is she doing to him? Is this a toxic relationship? Does she have a plan to get her shit together? Hopefully, authorities will take this into consideration and maybe dish out a proper sentence. Maybe the best way to get a Yankee player back on track is having his no-good partner face a good 10-year stretch of prison time!  

3c. If, as in the case with Judge, we have no easy way to discern whether he's currently running hot or cold, assigning swift and proper judgement to the girlfriend becomes a tough matter. I say we must defer a verdict until we know whether Judge's broken rib has healed, and if he's ready to play. If he's okay, then - hey, we're all reasonable people here - this woman deserves a second chance. If he's unable to play, well, throw the book at her!

Existential questions are really quite simple, while living in a binary Yankiverse.