Ah, who cannot recall the halcyon, pre-9/11, pre-everything days of the last Subway Series, when New Yorkers rallied in rare good humor in Bryant Park? Playfully jesting with each over which of their champion should claim the city crown, urged on in their sport by their popular, Yankee-loving mayor?
Seeking to bring back that heady time, the widely hated Mayor Bill de Blasio organized a similar rally in virtual Bryant Park ahead of tomorrow's all-New York World Series. But this time, there was a distinctly different tone to the proceedings.
Legions of local college students descended upon the park, demanding that the entire celebration—and the Series—be stopped because it only continued the hegemony of European games imposed upon the indigenous American population. They demanded that lacrosse be designated the official national pastime instead (or at least, any game that isn't soccer).
They were confronted by a phalanx of off-duty cops, right-wing militias, and people from Staten Island, led by the transformed Rudy, waving a half-empty bottle above his head, and cackling maniacally, "Kill 'em all!"
"Say, I thought we were here to talk about baseball!" interjected Mayor Bill D., who then threw himself to the ground to dodge a hail of bottles and brickbats that came from all directions.
As night fell on the beloved park named for one of the city's outstanding men of letters, roving bands of antifa, fa, ultra-Orthodox radio ranters, Catholic secret society cultists, assorted Wall Street thieves, Allies of the 337 Genders, QAnon conspiracists, the ranting leaders of the PBA, SBA, and ABA, disgruntled municipal workers, disgruntled municipal slackers, interested tourists, alienated members of the white working class, un-alienated members of the white working class, the woke, the broke, the last good toke, and even the no-longer-innocent bystanders set upon the park and tore it all to shreds in a matter of minutes.
Later, Mayor de Blasio's office issued a statement condemning all sides. Former Mayor Giuliani made the baying sounds that were the only noises he was capable of making any longer, having further evolved into a gigantic, multi-headed dog.
Play ball!
Isn't that Cerebus? The dog.
ReplyDeleteI'm too lazy to look it up.
I believe you're right. But any dog will do.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
God bless you
I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.
LOTTO, lottery,jackpot.
ReplyDeleteHello all my viewers, I am very happy for sharing this great testimonies,The best thing that has ever happened in my life is how I win the lottery euro million mega jackpot. I am a Woman who believe that one day I will win the lottery. finally my dreams came through when I email believelovespelltemple@gmail.com and tell him I need the lottery numbers. I have spend so much money on ticket just to make sure I win. But I never know that winning was so easy until the day I meant the spell caster online which so many people has talked about that he is very great in casting lottery spell, . so I decide to give it a try.I contacted this great Dr Believe and he did a spell and he gave me the winning lottery numbers. But believe me when the draws were out I was among winners. I win 30,000 million Dollar. Dr Believe truly you are the best, all thanks to you forever