We don't need another rundown on the rotation, no peek at the batting order, not even a lecherous glimpse of Jasson "Our Favorite Martian" Dominquez. Nope. Instead, talk about buried treasure, mermaids, gorillas riding unicorns... Luis Medina - age 21.8, says FanGraphs - today's Most Interesting Person in the Yankiverse.
Okay, I know what you're thinking: Hmm... food, good... need meat... must propagate... look out window... tree... obey...
Hold that thought. You know, Stupor Sunday is not the day to try channeling Rod McKuen. Here's all you need to know:
Luis Medina has been named Liga de Beisbol Professional Roberto Clemente (LBPRC) Pitcher Of The Year! (LBPRCPOTY)
Yes, he was the Puerto Rican Cy Young - the Kershaw, the Cole, the Koufax - of limited short season beisbol in our very best favorite U.S. commonwealth. (Viva statehood! Viva now!) Thus, Medina brings something unique to Yankee single-A prospects:
An actual baseline performance - as opposed to scouting reports and surgically edited YouTube videos - on which to ponder his potential.
Medina made four starts in the recent LBPRC (pronounced "Lib-Prick".) He pitched 16.2 innings and gave up only one run. But here's the takeaway: He fanned 32 batters, while walking only six. The rub on Medina - who is said to hit 102 mph on the radar gun - was always "great stuff/no control." If he's throwing strikes, who knows?
And if not - if he's just another Alex Graman - well, shoot me. And by the way, I'm tired of all the smart-mouthing around here. It's been a dark winter, and you know what? The days are growing longer, Jose Canseco just got the snot beat out of him on streaming video, and we have the fukking LBPRCPOTY (pronounced "Lib-prick-potty.") Trevor Bauer may have won the 2020 NL Cy Young, but that's ancient history. What has he done lately?
Okay, it's worth noting that Medina started a game in the Caribbean World Series, and he wasn't exactly Pedro. He tanked in the fourth against an MLB lineup that included Robbie Cano, Melky Cabrera and Jonathan Villlar. Still, he looked sharp through the first two, and no starters go long in winter ball. I'll take two knockout innings, because that's all we'd ever ask from Medina in 2021.
So... tonight, as you subject your brain to the cleansing... hold this thought:
Luis Medina! Puerto Rican Pitcher Of The Year! Fukk, yeah!
Thank you for imbuing me with hope, mighty Duque!!
ReplyDeleteSincerely,
~ Lib Prick Numero Uno
Okay, it's worth noting that Medina started a game in the Caribbean World Series, and he wasn't exactly Pedro. He tanked in the fourth
ReplyDeleteSign him and put this guy in the bullpen throwing 102. See what Kevin Cash says then...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIn 1943, General George Patton beat British General Montgomery by a few (or was it several?) hours in the Race to Medina. So, old George was the winner, but the important thing was, Medina was liberated.
ReplyDelete78 years later, Medina may liberate our Question Mark and the Mysterians rotation. (More accurately, it was "? and the Mysterians.")
This has been another episode of "Ripley's Believe It Or Else."
And Jhoulys Chacin, Adam Warren, Kyle Barraclough, Asher Wojciechowski, Luis Garcia, Nestor Cortes Jr and Tyler Lyons all could be on the way and so could the antacids.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I know what you're thinking: Hmm... food, good... need meat... must propagate... look out window... tree... obey...
ReplyDeleteIt's like you read my mind.
ReplyDeleteMedina got roughed up by Robbie Cano, Melky Cabrera and Jonathan Villlar.
Big deal. The BIG GAME is about to start. Pass the juice.
JM - I hope we are not looking at a season of 96 teardrops...
ReplyDelete@13bit - Too many teardrops for one heart to carry on...
ReplyDeleteHopefully, Medina will be hot this season and not be "Funky Cold Medina"
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
God bless you
I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.
LOTTO, lottery,jackpot.
ReplyDeleteHello all my viewers, I am very happy for sharing this great testimonies,The best thing that has ever happened in my life is how I win the lottery euro million mega jackpot. I am a Woman who believe that one day I will win the lottery. finally my dreams came through when I email believelovespelltemple@gmail.com and tell him I need the lottery numbers. I have spend so much money on ticket just to make sure I win. But I never know that winning was so easy until the day I meant the spell caster online which so many people has talked about that he is very great in casting lottery spell, . so I decide to give it a try.I contacted this great Dr Believe and he did a spell and he gave me the winning lottery numbers. But believe me when the draws were out I was among winners. I win 30,000 million Dollar. Dr Believe truly you are the best, all thanks to you forever