At 31, for better or worse, Giancarlo Stanton is a full-time DH.

Apparently, the Death Barge will nix the infamous Jay Bruce option.

Barring last-minute injuries - always a possibility! - Bruce will miss the Yankee opening day roster and hit the Odd Lots & Dinged Merch market. From there, he'll be Kong in the last reel of the first King Kong Vs. Godzilla, swimming home to Japan, or Monster Island, or Gilligan's Island... whatever. The cries of Bruuuuuuce shalt not echo across Yankee Stadium (until the day You Know Who plays there.)

I believe Bruce's fate was sealed last week, when the brain trust ruled that Giancarlo Stanton would play absolutely no outfield this spring. Not one inning. Not one fly. Not even a Strat-o-Matic, or a photo op with a supermodel.

At age 31, Stanton is a fulltime DH. (Actually, this came about last year, at 30.) The Yankees say he might patrol LF in a National League park, but seriously, folks: Would they really risk sending him out to pasture in - say - a dozen games, with his characteristically lame defense and without any practice? They might as well paste him to a wall. He'll be a "Break Glass In Case of Emergency" fielder, used in 20-inning games and impossible scenarios, like when Tyler Wade pitches. My guess: Aaron Boone won't even let him try to steal a base. He'll pinch run Mike Tauchman, rather than stress test the Giancarlo hammy.

So... in case you're wondering... 

David Ortiz became a fulltime DH at age 28. 

Edgar Martinez did it at 32. 

Frank Thomas, 34. 

Jim Thome, 35. (He had those years in Phily, with no option.) 

If Stanton can last 10 years without bloating into Moby Turnip, he could follow his DH brothers into the Hall of Fame. He will be remembered as a hitter. That great season - his MVP year playing OF in Florida? That's dinosaur history. Stanton's roster spot meant the Yankees could not realistically keep Bruce - a veritable second DH. They needed Tauchman's versatility. (It didn't hurt that Tauchman also outhit Bruce in camp.)

One potential drawback to Stanton becoming a stone statue: If his bat goes south, the Yankees will have fewer salary dump options. The idea used go be that we might someday send Stanton's killer contact to a California team, to his family's roots. The Dodgers loomed as a likely mark candidate. Well, that's gone. Like Bruuuuuuuuuuuce.