HoraceClarke66: The Yankees Are the Team of the Past and Always Will Be! Part de One.

 From the unrepentant pen of HoraceClarke66:

Boy, you lose your router service for four days—no doubt due to all the rage and vituperation pouring out of my keyboard on Saturday—and you come back to find your co-religionists lurching into heresy. I have never felt more like Moses, come down from the mountain top.

 Well, all right, that’s not true. My wife says I’m like that pretty much every morning.

 But never mind! I’m shocked to find even our Peerless Leader lamenting—no doubt, slyly tongue-in-cheek—how even our favorite team’s past feats have been surpassed in this torturous century.

 Never! says I, even though such malarkey now proliferates online, and in other such sinkholes of our collective human intelligence.

 Cal Ripken passed Lou Gehrig’s record? Did Cal Ripken play without a helmet? Did he try to play through ALCS? No, he did not.

 Crazy Carlton over the Chairman of the Board? I’m sorry, but Whitey takes the lifetime ERA match-up, 2.74-3.22—not to mention World Series wins, 10-2. And did Carlton ever do a commercial with Salvador Dali? I think not. 

Mike Trout has surpassed The Mick? The Big Fish has never got within sniffing distance of a World Series in his 10 full seasons of play—something that shows less than an overwhelming desire to win in this era when players can choose their own teams.

 Instead, Trout seems quite content to paddle about in laidback SoCal, hanging up stats. The last time Trout played in the postseason was 2014, when he batted a mighty .083 in 3 division series games. Mickey Mantle? Try Ernie Banks—at a less important position.

 Speaking of desire, Trout in those 10 years has already missed 293 games and counting. He may well miss the rest of this year, which would get him up over 350 games on the DL. Mantle, the most famously injured athlete in baseball history? He missed a total of 92 games in his first 10 full years with the Yankees.

 Just why is Mighty Mike so injury prone? Hey, I make no accusations! But if he gets anymore bulked up he can take up playing linebacker on those October days he always has free.

 And speaking of fraud, Barry Bonds “crushed” Ruth and Maris’ records? Sorry. The man was so juiced up his head literally expanded. In another, more enlightened age, he would have been tried for witchcraft. So would his partners in our Age of Fraud, Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa.

 Which leaves us with the saddest piece of internet foolishness of all…