“Next year, when you’re in the box in April and it’s cold and it’s 20 degrees, you go … ‘Hmm … I wonder if this is a dead ball or a juiced ball? What’s the league comin’ at us today with?"

Funny, the things that spill out of a lockout...

Free agent Andrew Rizzo recently went on a podcast rant about MLB owners' balls and -frankly - it's disgusting. 

Turns out, each owner has two balls: One dead, one juiced. And if you're the Players Union, which means sleeping with management, you never know which ball you're gonna get. Isn't that disgusting? And for the last two years, MLB has secretly altered the fabric of the game by using the widely divergent balls.

The players have noticed. Independent analysts have noticed. You'd need lead blinders to think the gambling industry - of which MLB is up to its eyeballs in sleaze - hasn't noticed. The perkiness of the ball affects every aspect of the game - from Gerrit Cole's spin rate to Gleyber Torres' HR power.

As scandals go, this one is as under-appreciated as Phil Lesh's bass work with the Grateful Dead. Remember back when Tom Brady and the New England Patriots were caught deflating footballs? Remember the outrage surrounding his suspension? This is arguably worse, and it's just starting to bloom.  

Of course, the owners blame Covid. Viruses don't sue for libel. The owners say ballmaker Rawlings ran out of balls, so different balls were sourced, and hey, fans, whaddaya want - for games to be played with condom-encased Milk Duds? Nobody knew which ball was being used, so it was fair, right? And that's Chinatown, Jake. 

I suppose in a dystopian way - the world ending, democracy in peril, etc. - you get a few Mulligans, right? Still, we're not talking about Major League Cornhole. (Imagine the outcry if the beanbags were altered.) And now, here we have Honest Andrew Rizzo asking a fundamental question: 

Did the high-profile Yankees, staples of nationally televised games, face more juiced balls than others?

"Are we goin’ the Iowa game where the balls were flying out like they were golf balls, or are we gonna go Wrigley Field in April with the wind blowing in?’ … The big games, you know you’re getting the juiced balls, for sure.”

Hmm. Does Rizzo know something? I suspect he's not the lone conspiracist in the union ranks. Generally, the Yankees see more network games than anyone else - a vestige of their former glory. If that means a different ball, well, it's not fair. Not by a longshot. 

Funny, the things that spill out during a lockout.