Tuesday, April 26, 2022

In the matter of trading Joey Gallo, the Yankees must revoke the Iron Rule of Cashman

Apparently, the Death Barge last winter spoke with the Padres about a possible deal for Joey K. Gallo, the current Yankee pariah. Apparently, SD was willing to take the all-or-nothing strikeout machine - though only at a price tag far below what Cooperstown Cashman gave up last August to get him. 

(Note: Here's that package, small sample sizes: 

Ezequiel Duran, 23, IF, hitting .254 at AA. 
Trevor Hauver, 23, 3B, .103 at High A.
Josh Smith, 24, SS, .273 at AAA.
Glen Otto, 26, P, 5 IP, 1 ER at Texas.

We also received Joely Rodriguez, whom we recently converted into Miguel Castro.)

As long as Gallo is hitting .146 - (his OBP is .255) - nobody shy of Red Klotz and his Washington Generals will give up a bag of lint for him. To make Gallo disappear, or convert him to Bitcoin, the franchise must abolish the Iron Rule of Cashman, which states that the Yankees only trade players when their market value plummets to near Absolute Zero. 

To trade Gallo, Cashman needs the slugger to get hot. Then comes the paradox: If Gallo is hitting, the Yankees won't trade him.

Over the years, let's give Cashman credit: He has shown one great talent. He signs players off the scrap heap. Consider Lucas Luetge! Geo Urshela! Cameron Maybin! Nestor Cortez! They got them all for next to nothing. When it comes to picking up aging, reanimated bodies, Cashman is the Pete Davidson of GMs. He buys "cheap," always knowing that his boss loves "cheap." 

Last year, right about now, the Yankees signed Rougned Odor for no other reason than Texas would pay his salary: The Rangers had seen enough. It didn't matter that Odor had hit .167 the previous season - and .202 before that. He checked the "cheap" box. Hal Steinbrenner approved.

The Rays have built their organization by perpetually trading players at the peaks of their value - and obtaining younger versions. Last winter, they traded Austin Meadows for prospects. Cashman would never do such a thing. For four years, despite reservations about the player, Cash refused to trade Clint Frazier; he feared Frazier would become a star for another team, and it would sink the GM's reputation in NY. 

Same with Gary Sanchez, whom Cashman traded after all other options were kaput. Same with Greg Bird. Michael Pineda. Joba Chamberlain. Dear God, stop me. It might soon happen with Gleyber Torres and Miguel Andujar, each of whom a year or two ago could have brought the Yankees huge trade packages. But we hold players when they're hot, and we trade them when they're cold. (Tom Selleck should be in the YES booth, selling reverse mortgages.) 

So... Gallo? At some point - in theory anyway - he will get hot. Broken clock, right? Gallo will meet a struggling Triple A pitcher and launch two or three tape measure HRs - huge exit velos! - prompting the YES team to declare that our long national nightmare has ended!

That night, the Yankees need to trade Gallo - boom - for whatever they can get.

Alas, I'm dreaming. The Iron Rule of Cashman ensures that they won't.

15 comments:

  1. Nah, in this case I think they absolutely will trade him ASAP. He’s a free agent at the end of the season, they’ll get a pair of single a lottery tickets and call it a win.

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  2. Watching Cashman all these years, I wouldn't be surprised if they try to resign Gallo after he becomes a free agent.

    I know it's stupid, I know it's laughable, but we all know Cashman.

    At the moment, I'm glad they got Rizzo back, though. He's got 5 HR and leads the team in RBI. He probably won't be able to maintain that level of production, but then, the team probably won't be able to maintain it's place at or near the top of the division.

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  4. I think we give Cashman too much credit for scrap heap redemptions. It reminds me of what my friend with Leukemia once told me about the reputation of his doctor. "We only hear from the few he keeps alive or cures. The majority of the patients he doesn't cure aren't able to comment." So too with Cashman. Sure, Duque's examples are very good ones. But like that cancer doctor, the majority of rejects he assembles never pan out.

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  5. Duque, anybody who believes that Cashman is a good GM, here is proof otherwise. Getting Gallo out of here is a plus. What more does Joey K. have to do to prove his worth less ness?

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  6. Dantes, from your lips to God's ears.

    But I fear just the opposite. I fear that Cooperstown Cashman feels the real genius move is to hang on to Ton o' Value Joey through thick and thin, waiting until the shift is banned next year.

    Anyone actually watching the games—as opposed to the numbers—can see that Joey actually sucks against any and all defensive alignments, But that won't stop our Boy Genius.

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  7. And Peerless Leader, how about a DL report? How are you feeling?

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  8. We knew he couldn't say in the lineup for long. HICKS is down with a case of the newborns. Andújar recalled (when he use to play better)

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  9. God bless...though I always love how these guys don't bother to do any family planning around the season. Can you imagine this in any other profession?

    "Hey, that's our busy season!" "Yeah, fuck you!"

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  10. HICKS is down with a case of the newborns.

    What's the over/under on how long it takes him to strain an oblique warming up a bottle of formula?


    (Ok. A bit snarky. So shoot me.)

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  11. Cashmans motto:
    "Buy Cold"
    "Sell Colder"

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  12. Perfection, L.B.J. I live on snark, so thanks for sharing.

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  13. I'm not sure if I'd be too crazy about being a Rays fan. Trading star players who are just hitting their prime would be infuriating. Call me jaded, but I'm not going along with that "little train that could" bullshit (see Cubs, Chicago). Tampa has played the game about as brilliantly as possible, but they still don't have a ring, their ownership is even more risk adverse than Hal has become. Tampa should have picked a year or three, to go for the Ring, and see if they could sell more tickets. Admittedly, that strategy hasn't worked for Miami, but Tampa doesn't have the same demographic. If Tampa was to win a Ring without picking up more attendance they should move to another state where people enjoy going to games. Being an old bastard who spent most of my life in Miami, now living close enough to catch games in Tampa I believe that Florida will never support MLB (well maybe Jacksonville).

    Sorry, sorry I got bit carried away. Like everyone else on this blog, I expect at least a pennant every year. I was stunned, then infuriated when Hal gave his sickening little speech about parity that could have been lifted from "Das Capital". What a sick, smarmy little bastard he has become! The George Soros of baseball. IMHO, that and his " bondholders speech " is so much worse than the years of coming up a few players short (It's now clear that Hal nixed deadline trades which very well could have brought back a Ring or two). I think that Hal, not Da Brain is our true villain and bastard. Cashman merely wants to keep making his millions and continue with an enjoyable, exclusive job. Hal gets off on spoon feeding the writers and fans his crocodile tears....

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  14. You have a point, Kevin. I would be infuriated, too, if I were a Rays fan.

    And frankly, I just don't believe the idea that baseball in Florida is hopeless. A booming state full of good weather and Hispanics, the most baseball-loving ethnic group in the country?

    I think one has to look much more at undercapitalized owners who spend as little as they can, in both Tampa and Miami. Witness Jeter cutting bait on the Marlins—and with TB, fans get to go to one of the most dismal ballparks I've ever seen.

    There's no point in running a cartel if you're not even going to go to your strength—which is controlling the competition. Manfred Mann and cronies should have long ago forced the FL bozos out and found a couple of Steve Cohen types (that is, open wallets!) to go in and spend what's necessary.

    But hey—thank goodness they don't. An owner willing to toss around the bucks combined with TB's front office, and we would never win anything again.

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