That's right. A number of your New York Yankees are struggling to keep their averages NOT just above .200—now deemed, somehow, a sufficiently high batting average if accompanied by enough home runs and walks, which it never is—but just to stay on the Interstate.
That is, to stay hitting above .100.
One of our starters, Kyle Higashioka, has actually gone off the Interstate already, exiting along a service road to...who knows where? I'm thinking maybe Pa
Palookaville, which is where .097 hitters play.
Higgy, in what may well be the worst start by any Yankees catcher, ever, also has zero home runs and zero RBI. A true triple threat!
(Here is the original Mario Mendoza, left, a lifetime .215 hitter in reality...which puts him 9 points above TOV Gallo.)
As of today, The Gleyber, Crusty Ol' Josh Donaldson, and Joey, Joey, of course, are below .200. Torres and Gallo, at .167 and .135, respectively, WELL believe that Mendoza Line.
But is it possible that they will swerve off the Interstate as well?
Gallo was down to .111 in yesterday's Debacle in Detroit, before managing to muscle a single to the opposite field (For which, of course, he was promptly fined $50,000 by Cashman for achieving an "Untrue Outcome.).
It would take a lot, now, for Gallo to get back down under .100. Which is why it is so rarely achieved. But I have faith in Joey! And in Gleyber!
But hey—I still have faith that even Stanton, currently coasting along at a lofty .216 has it within him to get below .100.
Who knows how low it can go???
If I can just get off a this L.A. freeway
Without gettin' killed or caught...
When I was a kid, I used to memorize the basic batting averages, like 1/8 was .125 and 2/7 was .286. By interpolating, you could estimate a guy's batting average pretty accurately without a calculator, even when they had a few hundred at-bats.
ReplyDeleteNow, all that is out the window. Because these guys suck so bad that their batting averages are never-even-heard-of-microscopic. 1 for 8 is nothing for these guys. We're talking about 12 for 500 for the season. That would be .024, by the way. (By the way, I cheated; I just used a calculator.)
Don't believe Gallo could accomplish that? Believe me, this guy can do it. With a major assist from the stupid Yankee front office and Dumbass Boone, for continuing to run him out there despite all the strikeouts and hitless streaks.
I did the same, Hammer!
ReplyDeleteAnd never mind the players. If only our front office could go 1-8!
Incidentally, your New York Yankees are only on Amazon Prime Video today.
ReplyDeleteWhat a pity that we will not be able to watch this great team at its peak! Oh, the humanity!
Or is that humidity?
I caught the game on Bally Sports Great Lakes.
DeleteThe announcer noted that Rizzo had abandoned his " soft stroke " meaning that he took the pitches over or on the outside part of the plate the other eay and appeared to be trying to pull the ball and swinging as hard as he could on each pitch he offered at. In the 7th inning, he did hit it to the left side and got a single, the grounder untouched. The announcer exclaimed " there, that's exactly what I meant."
I guess everyone sees what the Yankees hitters are doing.
Oh the humidor-pity
ReplyDeleteNever lose hope! Falafel now has the highest batting average among regular starters, at a stunning .293. If he gets over .300 tonight I will buy his jersey.
ReplyDeleteI just read that the Red Menace went on the IL with appendicitis, with a robust batting line of .143/.250.238. Pro sports is a cold, cruel line of work, any weakness is exploited. I have to wonder if his early bravado was a shield, A portent of things to come.
ReplyDeleteGentlemen (Ladies?) I must confess…Thanks to my better half, we are a Prime household.(Myself, I’ve been banned by Amazon. I shit you not) Team seems a little crisper tonight, except for Gallo of course, 0-3 and totally botched a ball in LF. We really should pursue a trade for him, out of simple human decency if nothing else.
ReplyDeleteJoey Whiffs is totally lost hitting…
ReplyDeleteRolaids time…
ReplyDeleteYankees Win!!!
ReplyDeleteYanks have given up 38 runs in 14 games…third fewest in Yankee history…
ReplyDeleteI noticed that CHAPPIE stayed away from his fastball. Loss of confidence in his diminished heat, or is something getting ready to break? Hey, he wants to be a Yankee for life! Joy!
ReplyDeleteGallo is now batting .122…
ReplyDeleteHow bout the King? 8 k’s in 3 innings? Yup. Judge doing it all tonight.
ReplyDeleteGallo stunk the joint out again
Maybe our best played game this year.
Gotta say, I always loved the King. I thought he had great movement on the ball from the start, and I was all for him. And then...he really sucked for a couple years. But...he seems to be back.
ReplyDeleteNice win. They're all nice wins. When they're wins. But Stanton and Gallo are still amazing drains on the whole enterprise.
Duque:
ReplyDeleteThis unfortunately is a result of too many all or nothing hitters and being taught launch angle. Stanton and Judge just have to meet the ball and it will go out. Speaking of a player who cannot, Gallo after one of his at bats Friday night looking terribly down. I hope he is not contemplating suicide. He looked that distraught. Let's remember who brings in these all or nothing whiff masters, no other than Genius Cashman.
Sorry, my bad. Horace, not Duque.
ReplyDelete