Wednesday, June 29, 2022

No Let Up!

 

The CI—Catcher's Interference—Series continues!

Sure, if baseball continues like this, the sport will soon rank behind women's curling in popularity. 

 Nevertheless! A win is a win is a win—and your New York Yankees need to follow up today by swiping still more candy from the barely cognizant infant that is the Oakland Athletics. That is what good teams do:  they put the boot in, when an opponent is lying helpless and comatose on the ground.

(Please excuse the disgusting word picture. But hey, we're all Yankees fans here, am I right?)

In other important news:

—The Yanks drew 38,051 fans to last evening's snore fest. This is significant only because the 

(rapidly multiplying) New York Mets drew 36,673 fans for their stomping at the feets of the Best Little Cheaters in Texas.  

This makes 6 straight, head-to-head dates between the New York teams this year...with the Yankees prevailing in all 6. 

Who owns New York? 

No. 7 comes this afternoon.

—We are all agreed that Joey Gallo must go.  Now.

—Speaking of the Flushing team, it's time for Cooperstown Cashman and especially HAL to acknowledge reality at last, and take the advice of Kenny Rogers.


No, not THAT Kenny Rogers!  

You know, Kenny Rogers Kenny Rogers, the Gambler!

Personally, I never understood how you could bet if you weren't counting your money at the table. 

But never mind!

It's past time for the Yankees to know that it's time to fold 'em.

Push all their chips across the table to Aaron Judge and say, 'All right, big boy, name your price.'

I don't say that it's impossible such a move will come without serious, karmic repercussions. Knowing the juju entities as we all do, the moment they ink the Big Guy to a 10-year, $8-quadrillion deal, he will tweak some permanently disabling gonad.

But enough, already.  

The longer The Judge goes unsigned, the larger the possibility that he will skidoo to Queens after this season, thereby permanently crushing our mojo. Don't bet against Steve "Whatever It Takes" Cohen shelling out whatever our last superstar standing wants, to make his old man's fantasy come true.

Sign Judge. Dump Gallo. Take the last game.  

Got it? Good. Go forth and multiply.  NOT you, Mr. and Mrs. Met.







36 comments:

  1. That rant was truly disgusting.

    Thank you!

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  2. Thanks, Horace!

    Ryan Weber has decided to forego free agency and has re-signed with Yanks.
    He is the Bronx today replacing JP Sears who has returned to SWB

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  3. The bloom may be off the Taillon rose.
    Keep your phone handy, JP.

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  4. Wait - Maybe there's NOT enough Jameson is that lad . . .

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  5. Anyone seen Domingo? We could use a starter.

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  6. This one is sucking big time.

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  7. The Jameson finally kicked in. People tell me that the body builds up resistance after a while.

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  8. It does. I know from first hand experience.

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  9. Donaldson another victim of the new ball.

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  10. Stanton has 5 home runs in his last 6 games. Impressive.

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  11. Wonder what the record is for consecutive hits being homers?

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  12. I'm at work. Things seem to have been pretty exciting so far.

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  13. Gotta give props to Taillon for slogging through five. Thank the gods for the A's: a better team would have mauled him.

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  14. I love the shots of the kids eating their $15 ice cream.
    Somehow it seems the announcers have calmed a little. TG- it was just awful lastnight.

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  15. Wait- did I read here about a comatose infant on the ground thing? In my day, that was the February edition of the “Scouts in Action” comic in Boys Life

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  16. Castro being Castro. Two on with a two run lead. Nailing it down, just not sure for who. Or is it whom?

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  17. June looked like our hardest month on paper and we've gone 22-5 (.815) with one game to go.

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  18. Was working during all of this..

    Yankees Win!!!

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  19. Mets lost, on a two-run homer in the ninth. And Lindor called out on an outside pitch, for the last out.

    Darn. That's terrible.

    Verlander threw 8 shutout innings. Thank goodness we don't have THAT fucker.

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  20. Oh, and apparently all of Boston is up in arms because their bullpen "ace," Tanner Houck, the man with the name from a bad action film, was not vaccinated, and thus could not appear in Canada.

    Gee willikers, that's a terrible break. And that vaccine ban is real! Who knew?

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  21. June looked like our hardest month on paper and we've gone 22-5 (.815) with one game to go.

    Love these observations, ZacharyA.

    What I would love even more would be for the Yanks to win tomorrow so that they end up taking 3 of 5 from the AsteriskOs for the month.

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  22. And Milwaukee beat the TB Rays. Again.

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  23. You're gettin' greedy, LBJ—JUST LIKE A TRUE YANKEES FAN!

    I love it.

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  24. Looks like Yordan Alvarez took a face full of Jeremy Pena fielding a pop up today. Had to be carted off. So sad and I will warm up a spot in the Ellsbury Memorial Hot Tub for him.

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  25. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  26. Hoss,

    Don't knock women's curling. They even have their own calendar.

    It's not like women's rugby (sorry for the visual there).

    https://gunaxin.com/ladies-curling

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  27. We are being set up by the Juju gods for the biggest ass-pasting of all time.

    Mark my words...

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  28. Could well be, bitty.

    BUT...as of now, we are all too well aware of it. Even the cruelest ending—at least, the cruelest ending WE CAN SEE—will not be a surprise.

    The question is what the juju deities can come up with to fool us. That makes my skin crawl.

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  29. Listen to my sweet Bitty!! LISTEN TO BITTY!! IGNORE THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN!!

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