Hope Week continues: DJ says his troubled bigtoe is good to go

Generally, when it comes to complex medical matters, I try to break things down to the simplest terms, so the bootless and uneducated among you can follow along. Unfortunately, to do justice to today's clinical matter, I must get a bit precise, in terms of predisposed nomenclature, heretofore. 

Over winter, DJ LeMahieu chose against having bigtoe surgery.  

This was no easy decision. DJ had recruited a top big toe surgeon with a pedigree in bigtoe work: bigtoe-ectomys, big toe reductions, bigtoe enhancements and cosmetic bigtoe bunion lifts. He was on the verge of dipping his bigtoe into the surgical waters, so to speak, but in the end, he told el bigtoe, "Hell, no!" He'd keep his old bigtoe, warts and all, and let the healing balm of Mother Time weave her bigtoe-saving magic.

Apparently, DJ's old bigtoe - the one that hits .330 - is back!   

Listen: It's a given that Aaron Judge and Gerrit Cole are the two biggest bigtoes on the Yankee foot brigade. If either accidentally chops off a bigtoe, say, in a tragic kitchen accident, we're screwed. If all four bigtoes stay healthy - (remember: each man has two) - we have a shot. But beyond those two key cogs, the 2023 Yankees face a pair of widely divergent scenarios:

1. A healthy and happy DJ bigtoe. He bats leadoff, hits .320 and plays 140 games at 3B, 2B and 1B, wherever needed. This is the team to beat in the AL East.

2. An angry and barking DJ bigtoe. He hits .250, requires special socks, and often hops on one foot, running the bases. This team chases the AL wild card.

We can talk wistfully about the bigtoes of Oswald Peraza and Anthony Volpe, and we can dread the return of Isiah Kiner-Falefa and Josh "No Show Toe" Donaldson, but it is LeMahieu's mammoth foot walrus that solves nearly all our infield toe woes - or leaves us with no sure solution.

Today, the bigtoe feels crackingly fine. Cross your fingers. And toes.