With thanks to Rufus and AboveAverage for reminding me that today is the day.
Ah, Bobby Bo! Who can forget that charming rascal? The man who once threatened Bob Klapisch—on camera—"I'll show you the Bronx!"
And he wasn't talking about the rat dogs at Yankee Stadium.
Of course we all know the story. Bonilla's agent so bamboozled the Mets' ownership during his hapless, first stop in Shea, as part of "The Worst Team Money Could Buy" team, that each July First, until the end of time through 2035, Bobby gets nearly $1.2 million—thereby turning a $6 million contract into what will be $30 million when the last check is cashed.
Hey, sounds like just another, typical piece of Hapless Mets lore, right?
Well, as the song goes, it ain't necessarily so.
Bobby Bo himself would make much of the legend, doing commercials, saying "Don't skimp on the agent," and describing him as "a special man."
And for years afterwards, Fred Wilpon would look down at the ground and shake his head and smile ruefully, over how he and his partner, Saul Katz, had been taken by that "special man"—one Dennis Gilbert, a former insurance agent, who supposedly understood annuities like nobody's business, and suckered the Metsies into deferring Bonilla's money into one such policy.
Uh-huh.
This story smelled from the get-go.
No disrespect to Dennis Gilbert, who I'm sure was the Merlin of life insurance. But we're supposed to believe that Wilpon and Katz, two self-made men who clawed their way up through the world of New York real estate, and then managed to wrest control of the Mets away from Nelson Doubleday...had nobody who understood annuities?
In fact, there were one, two, many Bobby Bonillas.
Right now, Bret Saberhagen is receiving $250,000 a year, and will through 2029. On, I guess, "Bret Saberhagen Day." Bret, who once sprayed a group of reporters with bleach from a Supersoaker, was also a Dennis Gilbert client.
But Daryl Strawberry, who was NOT a Gilbert client, receives $1.64 million every year from the Mets on "Daryl Strawberry Day"—and will through 2033.
General manager Frank Cashen's salary was also paid in deferments. And there is even a "Bobby Bonilla Day II" payment from the Mets, of $250,000, going back to his second, even more disastrous stint in Queens, in 1999?
So what gives?
Well, mostly Uncle Bernie.
Why would the Mets defer so many salaries, at such a high cost?
Because Wilpon and Katz had invested heavily with Bernie Madoff, the man who made Ponzi look like a piker. Every year, come rain or come shine, they could count on a solid, 18-percent return from Madoff.
With this sort of guarantee, it made sense for the Mets to defer all kinds of salaries. They were making even more, every year, year after year.
It all came a-cropper, of course, when Madoff went down in the Big Crash. But Wilpon and Katz were more anxious than ever, then, to make out that they'd had been thoroughly suckered by the great Dennis Gilbert. A federal arbiter was looking to claw back most of the money they had made via Uncle Bernie.
Did Wilpon and Katz know that Madoff was the Ponzi de tutti Ponzis?
Almost certainly not. It's hard to believe that they would take so big a risk—or that anyone could believe Madoff was running a total scam on such a scale. No one did, until it fell apart.
Were they suspicious about all those consistently great returns? Well, maybe they thought Uncle Bernie was doing some insider trading. But that would not have fallen on their heads.
Hey, it all worked out. Fred Wilpon—a charming man who loved to sell sportswriters on very dubious stories about himself and his team—got to pretend for years that the Mets couldn't spend money because Madoff had ripped them off. (He didn't.)
The feds never were able to claw back more than a tiny percentage of what the Mets' partners made by "investing" with Madoff, and Wilpon and Katz ended up selling the team for an immense profit to another operator, this one from Wall Street.
Win-win. And Bobby Bonilla, and all the rest, still get paid.
The only people who got screwed over were Mets fans. But don't they always?
Excellent piece Mr SixtySix.
ReplyDeleteShame that Jane Jarvis wasn't able to procure one of them Bonilla deals whilst employed by the NY Metropolitans . . . .
Thanks, AA!
ReplyDeleteAnd it looks like Sevvy is back to Setback.
Feces.
ReplyDeleteAt my last job, I used to remind all my Mets fans of this…lol…
ReplyDeleteWe’re not winning this game…
ReplyDeleteSevyy sucking, fans are clucking, Cashman has to go.
ReplyDeleteFive to zero, he's no hero, Sevvy's just a schmoe.
Lolz at Meredith's rundown of all the pitchers on "throwing programs."
ReplyDelete
ReplyDelete"Rented mule" comes to mind
Yanks aren’t using bullpen in game 1. Game 2 is a bullpen game…
ReplyDeleteJust as well. These kinds of games put me in the mood for the starter to be hung out to dry for 90-100 pitches, anyway.
ReplyDeleteCripes, what a shit start.
ReplyDeleteThis game is an insult.
ReplyDeleteAn abomination in the sight of Baal.
ReplyDeleteJust call the friggen game already…
ReplyDeleteMercy call.
ReplyDeleteGuess we ran into one of those real baseball teams again.
ReplyDeleteDid Brooks Krieski change his his to Matt Krooks?
ReplyDeleteI thought it was Crisco Krooks.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we get lucky and the second game is a rainout.
ReplyDeleteShould’ve traded him after his last start.
ReplyDeleteIf the team extends Severino I may breach the Front Office.
Big comeback in the ninth.
ReplyDelete*cough*
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ReplyDeleteIt was . . . The Game That Wouldn't Die
ReplyDeleteThe I Ching shows the Yankees winning 5-3
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite B-Horror films growing up was The Brain that Wouldn’t Die. Shame my phone didn’t autocorrect that to The Brian that Wouldn’t Die. Shame I say. Shame I tell you.
ReplyDeleteRufus - can you explain where everyone is given that Michael Kay just said that Volpe got a trippy?
ReplyDeleteSorry AA, but I don't understand the question.
ReplyDelete...and just realized they're actually playing again.
For the record, I haven't been trippy since Jerry Garcia was alive. Or maybe Dick Nixon. Remember to stay away from the brown acid.
the brown acid that is circulating around us isn't too good. It is suggested that you stay away from that.
ReplyDeleteMy most sincere apologies Roofy - I was preoccupied making dinner and margaritas for the family. Michael Kay actually said that Volpe hit a trippy before he corrected himself by saying he hit a triple. I found that to be very interesting. Then I lost interest as I continued to labor on this culinary masterpiece. I wish everyone worth their weight in salt here on our beloved blog could sample what I created. Alas it can not thus will not happen.
ReplyDeleteiPhone ending :(
ReplyDeleteI polished off an order of beef stroganoff with mushrooms over spaetzle...I'm bloated with cream sauce, should have only eaten half of it but it was so good.
ReplyDeleteAnd we're winning. Wow. I f could move, I'd be excited.
JM - Are you going to be there for the August event?
ReplyDeleteYankees manufacturing a run…
ReplyDeleteIs Volpe officially hot?
ReplyDeleteStop the presses: Little Tony is 4for8 today and his average has soared up to 220!
ReplyDeleteIn other news, the Cards have a CF (without a boot) named Lars Nootbaar. How's that for a baseball name?
No team has ever won the World Series with a player whose last name is Nootbar. You can look it up…
ReplyDeleteYankees Win!!!
ReplyDeleteThe I Ching was incorrect
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely game with manufactured runs, I could like this team!
ReplyDeleteWell, nice they bounced back. Bad that Sevvy was set back.
ReplyDeleteSevy is a Heavy downer to this team. Hard to say how it will work itself out
ReplyDeleteMy Yankees gut says that Sevy is gone within the next two weeks. But I may be wrong of course
ReplyDeleteAA, I will be there!
ReplyDelete"The Brain that wouldn't Die" , a movie that should be shown to kids in elementary schools once a year. A MUST see for film students who could learn editing software using Cashman's face. Sevy gets traded and turns into a young Verlander. I'm of the opinion that no matter who The Brain trades that player will bloom. We seemed to have picked the wrong simulation to wake up in...
ReplyDeleteTECH SUPPORT!!!!!
ReplyDeleteKnew the Brain would bring Kevin out
ReplyDeleteAA, LMAO!! Yeah,I traumatized myself, happily for many years on the genre. I believe that if you can deal with a ghastly, disembodied head who is PISSED about it's situation you are well on the way to dealing with almost anything. Especially with the ghastly lighting, makeup, and background music. No Generations since ours has done anything other than live in a whiney existential dread because they learned about violence before being inculcated in (but) controlled horror. No genuine books of horror, no disembodied brains made the Youth turn into spineless jellyfish. AMIRIGHT???๐
ReplyDeleteKevin,
ReplyDeleteI was indeed traumatized by Edgar Allen Poe as a sprite.
I remember getting walled up as particularly gruesome.
Also being severed by a razor sharp pendulum was icky.
I'm sensing a corollary between Poe's short stories and post-2010 Yankee fandom.
They just don't make them like Edgar anymore.
And for those watching at home...,
ReplyDeleteRodon threw 58 pitches over 3.1 innings with 8Ks and 1 hit in A+ ball last night.
Unless he hurt his back getting on the bus, he should be good to go next week.
CORRECTION- 3.2 innings.
ReplyDeleteneed to proofread before hitting "send".
I should have learned that lesson from one of my HR Interventions back in the day
Archangel, Poe had something to make everyone squirm. To this day I can't listen to ticking clocks, something I once to found to be relaxing. H.P. Lovecraft who I only very recently started to read, seems to be the fever dream of an alien ๐ฝ.
ReplyDeleteKevin - I have a couple of recommendations then . . .
ReplyDeleteAA, do tell๐!
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