Sunday, August 6, 2023

Big Gameth Today

Win today, and they take three out of four from Houston, a villainous team of grifters and cheats that has clutched our tippling testicles for the last four years. 

Win today, and they will - at worst - remain only three (3!) losses behind hateful Toronto, the carps of Canada, in the loss column. 

Win today, and they will be in a position to win three in a row against a winning team - (sweeping KC didn't count) -  something we haven't done since - um - May 29. (Actually, no. We next go to Murder City to play the lowly White Sox, so - technically, we cannot win three straight against a contender, but damn, cut me some slack here; it's hard to string together three-point posts because a) you always need three, b) they need to be punchy and spry and c) - um, HUMINA, HUMINA, HUMINA... OKAY, I DON'T GOT A THIRD, OKAY? SO, SEE WHAT I MEAN? THIS IS NOT PLUNGING A TOILET, IT'S BLOGGERY, AND IT'S NOT ALWAYS PRETTY.) 

Lose today, and - well - let's face it: Everything turns to shit. I hate to be one of those idiots who always says today's game is the most important of the season, and then tomorrow says it over again. But that's where the shittiest July has left us. There is no margin for error. The next losing streak will be our last for 2023. 

Win today... aw, hell... they just better win today...   

6 comments:



  1. Its just no good anymore since you went away

    Now I spend my time just making up rhymes of yesterday

    Three is the loneliest number that you’ll ever know

    Three is the loneliest number


    ReplyDelete

  2. Plunging a toilet is not always pretty either Boss.

    As much as I detest those sign-stealing cheating syrup city bastards I can at least take some small consolation in them being under a hotter part of the broiler. They're not even in the top three (THREE!) of my Standings Of Hatred as a matter of fact. That would go like this:

    1. The Florida Anythings. Pick any pro, college, high school, even beer league softball team from Florida and I hate them the most

    2. Notre Dame. Fuck Notre Dame.

    3. University of Southeast US. Georgia, Arkansas, Tennessee, Alabama, Kentucky - fuck 'em all. Exception: LSU football but only because I like their helmets.

    4. Texas. Texas everything. The Astros are here.

    5. The Yankees. Love/hate thing. The team on the field (except Jackie and maybe Stanton and definitely German)? - heart emoji. The organization from Boonehead up? - soft-serve grinning shit emoji.

    How's everyone's day so far?


    ReplyDelete

  3. There is a silver lining. Have you ever been to Houston? It's not Hell on Earth -- but you've got a swell view of the Devil's hidey-hole from there.

    I spent 2-3 weeks in Houston on business in the past. It was the worst 6 months of my life.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. A few things...

    1) Down Goes Jackie!!!!!

    I'm pretty sure Josh Donaldson has this playing 24/7 in his home theater.

    https://twitter.com/JomboyMedia/status/1687991852249522177


    20 Joe FoB - Easily my least favorite city in the USA. Not even close and I was in Baltimore in the 70's.

    Does Houston still have the, "Real Men Don't Rape" billboards? How big a problem was that?

    I mean in NY we had "Don't eat the lead paint chips" and "Don't cross the street in the middle... (in the middle, in the middle, in the middle of the block.)

    And may I add... use your eyes to look up, use your ears to hear (honk honk) walk up to the corner where the coast is clear. And wait. And wait. Until you see the light turn green. (repeat)

    But "Real Men Don't Rape!" Damn.

    3) AA - from the previous thread... "Now I'm waiting for you to share a foto of a fossilized airwick solid from a recent trip to Kentucky."

    No I don't have a picture of a fossilized Airwick Solid but my late father in law was a chemist and did work on the Shell-No-Pest-Strip. Does that count?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Duque: "I hate to be one of those idiots who always says today's game is the most important of the season...."

    Well, but it's true in our case. Every game that comes up becomes "the most important of the season" when you're chasing the frontrunner. When the magic number for elimination is down to one, then you're down to hoping that you win all remaining games and the team you're chases loses all. The only times this isn't true is if you're in the driver's seat or if you've already been eliminated.

    This is where all of those earlier games blown away by bubble bursting Boonie come into play. Remember the Tampa game where we were up 6-0 and ended up losing? Remember the Cubbies game that we seemed to be in command of with Domingo German only throwing 70 pitches and BaBoone yanking him for the bullpen? There were probably double digit games that were pissed away. Yep, we wouldn't be in these dire straits had we won some of those games that BaBoone pissed away.

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.