I hereby REFUSE to accept the bogus, dishonest, counterfeit and deceitful "2023 World Series" results, which would - RIDICULOUSLY - have you believe the lowly Texas Rangers beat the pathetic Arizona Diamondbacks in a recent set of orchestrated, scripted TV "sports" shows. NO WAY!
The Rangers... champions? What fools do they think us be? And who is their so-called MVP? Deranged Corey Seager? Travis Jankowski? Tony Fauci? George Soros? Hillary? DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY WITH THIS!
First off, before we do anything, questions must be answered.
1. Why didn't Fox use its A-team: Sean Hannity, Gilbert Gottfried! and - in my humble opinion - the great Lou Dobbs? If Laura or The Five were on hand, as judicial observers, these "games" might have worn a tiny cloak of credibility. Instead, we didn't even get "Meatball Joe" Buck and Troy Aikman, or the sideline ladies!
2. Why did this "series" have no cities? Think about it. NO CITIES? It pitted two states against each other. No city should have to play an entire state, unless it's Rhode Island, WHICH DOESN'T HAVE A TEAM! Really fishy. And not fair. Do they think we have no eyes?
3. How did Texas somehow acquire Jordan Montgomery, Nathan Eovaldi and Aroldis Chapman - for next to nothing? According to MLB, the trio netted the Yankees only Harrison Bader-Ginsberg. Are we supposed to think the Yankees had all three, and all they got in exchange was one injury-prone CF who - and people are saying this - wears LIFTS in his boots? THAT MAKES NO SENSE, UNLESS THEY WERE STOLLEN! Where are the servers? Subpoena the servers! And while we're on it, what the hell ARE servers?
4. Can anyone really claim that Texas - with a middle order of Evan Carter, Mitch Garver, Josh Jung and Nathaniel Lowe - is baseball's best? Sorry, folks, but those no-names can't hold a lick to the likes of Stanton!, Rizzo!, Torres! and LeMahieu! People are saying it's a hoax.
5. The entire event was a just attempt to weaponize the World Series against the Yankees. Okay, that's not a question, but dammit, I'm asking it anyway! Because it's true!
6. They're pulling a fast one. They claim free agency begins today, with the Yankee Freedom Caucus of Isiah Kiner-Falefa, Keyman Middleton, Zach McAllister, Frankie Montas, Wandy Peralta, Luis Severino and Luke Weaver. I'm not falling for it. They're all Yankees, and they don't get to grow their freedom beards. Not yet, anyway.
We must not validate the 2023 world series results - not until February, at least, when fans can storm the fields and get answers. Be there. Will be wild!
Exactly. Everyone is saying it.
ReplyDeleteHey, I thoroughly enjoyed the beatdown by the Lone-Star Lawmen of the Arizona Serpentines. Them venomous heads were severed with bowie knives and buried somewhere in the desert where no one will ever find 'em.
ReplyDeleteAfter pretending to be championship caliber for a while, the snakes disintegrated, reverted into the 84 win team they were. The defensive mistakes made me explode with laughter. After calling the game in favor of the snakes for pretty much the entire series, it's interesting that, in the 9th inning, the ump started calling everything close a strike. He must've had enough of this farce.
Were you singing "New York, New York" with two outs? Hell, I was. I was so inspired, motivated, supercharged after the Texas win that I even put in a great workout.
Congrats to Nate Eovaldi, Jordan Montgomery, Andrew Heaney, and Aroldis "Gunslinger" Chapman. You guys earned it!
What's it take to get a pitching coach like Mike Maddux?
ReplyDeleteThose ex-Yankee pitchers never would've reached that level under Matt Blake. HAL probably put a cap on the coaching budget, and Blake was all Dumbass Cashman could afford.
So it turns out that getting half the Yankees former pitching staff + a really good pitching coach + great defense + great offense + good manager = World Series Championship.
ReplyDeleteMarcus Semian was a free agent, no? He was a really good player in Toronto. And signing Seager put them over the top. Throw in a couple of newbies (Evan Carter, Jonah Heim), add to the roster of perennial losers, all of a sudden, you've got a "championship caliber" team. They did all this with Jacob DeGrom still on the shelf.
After seeing all this, Cashman will keep Matt Blake around for next year. And we already know Buffoone Ba-Boone is coming back. What can you do except laugh?
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ReplyDeleteDuque -
ReplyDeletePeople are saying that the Yankees overinflated their payroll numbers to a reported 280 million dollars when clearly, based on actual performance, the team on the field was only worth a third of that!
They then charged for tickets, food, and parking based on the 280M number.
One can only conclude that they committed fraud.
I have no memory of any of this - in fact I must urgently ask; “WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE AND HOW DID YOU GET INTO MY BATHROOM?”
ReplyDeleteAs far as the series goes...
ReplyDeleteGlad Arizona lost, well their owner anyway.
Could not bring myself to root for Texas, and the triumph of former Yankees and "should have been" Yankees was sour grapes at best given my general unhappiness with Texas in general and their sports teams in specific.
Glad to return to regular programming. Hating the Cowboys. Hating the Asstros. Refusing to eat Tex Mex. Refusing to watch old You Tube videos of Tex Antoine. Flushing KoTEX tampons down toilets. Only eating brisket that has been toughened and deflavorized in the tradition of Central European Jews.
There's more... a lot more. I just can't think of them, like the name of some fort I'm supposed to remember.
I think they named a rent-a-car company after it. Who names a company after a mega loss anyway? Why not Saigon Rent-A-Car?
Texas!
As Groucho Marx once said in one of the first times he broke the 4th wall... "Nacogdoches is full of roaches."
Was the WS televised this year?
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ReplyDeleteYou have it backwards Doug. It was the Alamo Mission San Antonio de Valero sponsored by Alamo Rent a Car. They shortened it to the Alamo.
Totally unwatchable. Five Christmas commercials during a Summer sport in October. Split screens with commercials, as they try to intersperse the game within the commercials. Not to mention many commercials between innings. John Smoltz and his diahrrea of the mouth. Joe Schmoe eats tuna fish before each game. They must score a run here. Let me tell you things that you already know. Bla bla bla bla bla!
ReplyDeleteYeah, Hammer, if I never hear the word, "Answerbacks" again, it will be too soon.
ReplyDeleteAnd hey, what a surprise: it looks like this will be the lowest rated World Series EVER. What a surprise! You take two so-so teams virtually at random, call them pennant winners...and no one watches. Huh.
I fear that professional baseball is done for our lifetimes. It will be nice to watch Judge, though.
That was not the World Series. That was the Arizona Fall League.
ReplyDeleteSorry if you don't agree with this...FOX couldn't wait to pull the plug on the World Series...so they ended in 5 games...ratings disaster...those advertisers must be pissed...
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure Gottfried's dead?
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