Does this man suffer from Attention Deficit Disorder?

 

Hey, don't get me wrong. ADHD is a serious thing, particularly among young people. But your average, 56-year-old executive has generally learned to deal with it.

Not our Brian.

Here, in the midst of the mind-bending, soul-crunching, Yoshinobu Yamamoto sweepstakes, the outcome of which may determine the Yankees' fate for generations ("generations," in this context, being defined as the next 5-10 seasons), our man in the Bronx went to the trouble of trading permanently marginal outfielder Billy McKinney (I almost wrote, "Rich McKinney") to Pittsburgh for $450,000 in international signing money. With which he then turned around, and in true, Whirling Dervish Cashman fashion...signed DR catching prospect and professional string bean, catcher Justin Capellan.

Hey, I dunno. Maybe Capellan will turn out to be the next Bill Dickey. More likely, he'll be the next Dermis Garcia. 

But Brian Cashman doesn't know, either. That's the thing about 17-year-olds.

The question is, why is The Brain, or anyone in the Yankees' front office, bothering with this sort of poultry dropping when we're in a life-and-death struggle to sign Yoshinobu Yamamoto? 

I understand that he can't spend 24/7 on inking The Admiral. At some point, the hay is in the barn, all stones have been overturned, and there's nothing more you can do. Though knowing the track record of Brian and HAL, I very much doubt this is the case.

But even if they have done all that is conceivably possible...why are they doing THIS?

Why not sign Josh Hader, the closer they will need anyway, and whose acquisition would say to YY, 'Hey, here's at least five more wins for you"? 

Why aren't they ensconced deep in the bowels of the Yankee Stadium Bat Cave (You know, I know, and the American people know it exists!), working out the fine points of the irresistible offer they are going to hit Monty with if Yamawamadingdong (sorry, already trademarked that nickname!) demurs?

Why aren't they scheming to bring the other great Japanese prospect recently unearthed by the crack team here at IIHIIFII...c, Roki Sasaki, the Monster of the Reiwa Era, to the Bronx WHETHER OR NOT THEY SIGN YAMAMOTO???

Inquiring minds want to know!

Instead...we get a 17-year-old catching prospect. It's almost as if the Cashbot feels, well, we just got rid of a catcher, time to get another one!

Currently, the Yankees still have Austin Wells, who should be their starting catcher next season; José Trevino, who should be his back-up; Ben Biceptvedt, the Monster of the Weight Room, and Ben Rice, the promising minor leaguer in place behind Wells and Trevino.

No need to spend even the smallest iota of brain capacity on wrangling Justin Capellan just now. That's work to fling to the new intern (Oh, right, I forgot: Cashman doesn't hire interns after, you know, considering how he got his job.).

Or is it that Cashie just can't help himself? Has this been his real problem all along? A congenital inability to concentrate on the matter at hand?