Wednesday, March 27, 2024

A distressed and disillusioned Yankiverse greets 2024 with reduced expectations


Well, folks, here they are: Your sad and hurtful Yankee predictions for 2024. Collecting them, I wept several times. 

(Note: You still have until noon Thursday E.D.T. to add or update predictions.)

The winner receives an all-expenses-paid weekend in Sarasota, a Super Mobility Power Scooter, a Safe Step Walk-in Shower our eternal respect.

Here are your predictions. (Mine comes tomorrow.) Read them and (bleep.)

IT IS HIGH             Yank            Wins by               HRs by
Commenter       team wins   Carlos Rodon    Juan Soto

"I'll Have What They're Drinking" Group
Stang                         103                      28                    73
RtotheE                      97                      10                    36
PgPick                        95                       12                    42
Gary Frenay             94                      10                     33
JM                                 93                        7                     47
Platoni                        93                      11                      39
Mattingly's
Mustache                   93                       9                     37
Doug K                        92                        9                     48
Parson Tom              92                      16                     38

The "Make it a Double" Group

Kevin                           91                       14                     43
Above Average        90                       12                     45
Jaraxle                        90                       11                      42
Vampifella                90                        6                     40
Hinkey Haines        89                       11                      31
Ken of Brooklyn     88                         8                     37
Joe of AZ                    88                         8                     44
Carl J. Weitz             88                         9                     41
Daveyhead               88                       10                      51
Ranger _lp               87                         8                     37
Above Average's 
Cat                                87                       10                     41
Lieber                         86                         9                     15
El Duque                    86                       10                     35
Mildred Lopez         86                       10                    29
Doctor T                     86                        8                     42
Pocono Steve           85                         7                     40
Publius                       85                         9                     33
BTR999                     85                         9                    35

The "I'm Feeling a Bit Queasy" Group
Acrilly                         84                         6                    44
Scottish
Yankee Fan
               83                         6                     27
Celerino Sanchez   83                         8                     34
Alphonso                   82                         4                     27
Rufus T Firefly        82                         3                     35

The "Somebody Get a Mop" Group
Bern Baby Bern       81                        14                    38
Dick Allen                 80                          9                    54
Hammer of God     80                          8                    36
Copelius                     79                          7                    52
13 Bit                            72                          7                    37
BASEBALL REFERENCE                71 wins 
HoraceClarke66     69                           5                   33

Remember: No additions or amendments after noon Thursday, E.D.T.

And come October, you will be held accountable for all Yankee sins.

14 comments:

  1. I'd like to lower my total wins down to 72 - more like 1967, a year you can find photographic proof that I was at the stadium with one of those idiotic plastic horns, some kids sunglasses, and an idiotic smile on my face, along with my buddies' faces, because we just knew that we were sitting in the seat of empire and that our own dynasty, which we didn't know was already over, would prevail, just like a good run-on sentence that you only realize that lasts too long WEEEEELLLLL after it's too late.

    I'm on record, although not as bleak as Hoss - for 72 wins

    Thanks for the opportunity to be of service. I'm going to go polish up my crystal ball. And my crystal balls, for that matter...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah fuck it I'm goin with 88 wins/ 8 Rodon wins/ 44 hr for Soto

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'll stick. What do those guys at Baseball Reference know, anyway?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Screw baseball reference. Listen to Hoss. Listen to the howls of pain rolling down River Avenue on a dark evening. Listen to the ghosts of Yogi, Scooter, the Babe and Mickey. They carry on the wind and quietly keen, "We're fuuuuuuucked...."

    ReplyDelete
  5. 79 was when I had an unexpected bout of optimism, like a sudden explosion of gas after the cabbage soup. 72 is my gut on pizza - slow and steady as she goes.

    ReplyDelete
  6. 88 wins 9 Rodon wins 41 Soto HR
    Perhaps getting Cole and The Martian back in the second half will be like trading for 2 stars and propel the Yankees toward a wild card run.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh, and may Cashman contract the Bubonic Plague from ingesting one of the stadium's notorious rodent-infested hot dogs. I wonder what those suckers are really made from. No beef, I'd wager. As they say in Texas about a fraud, "All rat and no cattle".

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm adding the changes as we go.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Seriously, Baseball Reference? A 71 win season would mean a total collapse fueled by unending injuries and ignoring the fact that practically every other team is just as mediocre as the Yankees.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Nah. Other teams have things like pitchers and players under 30.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I actually know what Mustang has been drinking, and I still wouldn't go with his numbers.

    Optimism ( even tongue in cheek...I want attention optimism ) just doesn't work for with this country.

    Not now.

    Not anymore.

    I'll have another shot of Jim Beam, please.

    ReplyDelete
  12. 91 wins/14 Rodon wins/43 Soto HR

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.