Monday, March 25, 2024

Here we go again: It's time to predict how many games the 2024 Yankees will win

Time marches on, passes, flies when you're having fun can go to Hell. 

Wasn't it yesterday that we - the bootless and unhorsed complainers of the Yankiverse - toasted the end of 2023, a torture trail of gonadal tweaks, GIDPs and Exit Velos? 

The Death Barge won a pitiful 82 games. Aaron Judge hit a mere 37 HRs, and Anthony Volpe batted a despicable .209. The results - even for YES, the most powerful propaganda machine in American sports - were unspinnable. It was a shit year.

Eighty-two wins. Eighty losses. Yikes. 

Obviously, the GM and manager were quickly fired the team audited itself and made no front office changes. Sparing no expense, the team signed Cy Young winner Blake Snell, Luke Weaver.

Last March, we invited IT IS HIGH readers to predict the number of Yankee victories that would happen in 2023. For a site perceived to be venomous and bitter toward the Yankee Condition, these projections came in ridiculously high. We perceive ourselves as harsh critics of the team. In fact, we are a bunch of giggling Holly Golightlys.  

In October's final tally, The WinWarblist proved to be the IT IS HIGH Nostradamus by predicting 85 victories. Alphonso - the relentless voice of doom - finished second. He was the only reader to project a sub-.500 season, 77 wins.

For the record, I was fat, drunk and stupidly upbeat, predicting 100 wins. And HoraceClarke66, currently the toast of the NYC literary scene, scored a rose-colored 93. 

Well, it's time again to put our Pollyannish ignorance on display. 

It's time to make our predictions for 2024.

Here's how we'll do this. Get your projections to me by Thursday, at 3:10 p.m. Eastern, when the Yankees begin their season in Houston. (They will lose, of course, unless astral projections from Garret Cole create a rip in the Matrix.) Over the next few days, post them into the Comments sections.

We need your predictions for:

The number of Yankee wins in 2024.

Tie-breaker No. 1: The number of wins to be recorded by Carlos Rodon in 2024.

Tie-breaker No. 3: The number of HRs to be hit by Juan Soto in 2024.

I'm slaving over my numbers and will post them Wednesday, after the team announces its final wave of secret injuries. 

Get out your abacuses, everybody. Get thee to an AI chatbox. Time is of the essence a fuckin' asshole. But who knows? Come October 5, maybe you will be the new IT IS HIGH Nostradamus. 

By the way, here's how we all did last year... Read it and bleep.

THE IT IS HIGH Predictions for 2023

Name                   Wins                Judge HRs        Volpe BA

The Idiots
Stang                     102                        74                          .241
JM                           101                         55                          .262
Platoni                  101                         52                          .287
ME, EL DUQUE  100                        63                          .238

Eaters of the Crap 
Ken of Brooklyn  98                       49                         .248
Mattingly’s Mustache  97           60                          .273
Dave Murray        97                        54                          .262
Ranger_lp            96                        47                           .273
Hammer of God   96                       37                          .260
PgPick                      96                       52                         .257
Doug K                     96                       47                          .301
Jaraxle (form Dantes)  96            52                          .282
Gary Frenay          96                       55                          .277

Hopeless Romantics
Zachary A               95                       43                          .253
Carl J. Weitz           94                       45                          .271
Kevin                        94                       52                          .274
Vampifella             94                        18                          .225
HoraceClarke66  93                        42                          .244
Hinkey Haines     93                        44                          .272
BernBabyBern     92                         36                          .276
AboveAverage      92                        48                          .281
David Bellela        92                         x                            x
MildredLopez       91                        44                           .251
Lieber                       91                        50                           .282
Rufus T. Firefly    90                       44                           .256
RtotheE                   90                       50                           .250

Dopeless Romantics 
Borntorun99        89                       36                           .248
Urban Farmer      89                        28                            .231
DickAllen               89                        54                            .241
Scottish Yankee fan   88               44                           .245
Archangel             88                         49                           .280
13bit                        86                          51                            .271
CelerinoSanchez  86                       39                           .269
WinWarblist        85                          52                           .242

The Angry One 
Alphonso              77                          47                            .289

45 comments:

  1. 84 wins, 6 wins for Rondon and 44 HRs for Soto

    ReplyDelete
  2. 87 Wins Yanks 8 Wins Rodon 37 HRs Soto

    ReplyDelete
  3. The number of Yankee wins in 2024.

    Lets see...

    Cole = 0 plus Soto and Gil, minus 1/2 Judge, (carry the Stanton off the field by May) times the number of games blown by Boone divided by the number of positions we did not address...

    92

    Tie-breaker No. 1: The number of wins to be recorded by Carlos Rodon in 2024.

    A better one might be the number of times Rodon acts like a whiney little bitch. But OK... I'll go out on a limb here and say that he breaks a limb after 9 wins.

    Tie-breaker No. 3: The number of HRs to be hit by Juan Soto in 2024.

    Sotto sono buoni! Walk year. Plays well under the lights... 48.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well, we went "all in" this year, which means of course we didn't. After another half-assed off-season performance by Hal and the Kinkies, we're doomed to more mediocrity.

    Even in the face of that, it's still basically impossible to predict the future, and we all know you can't predict baseball.

    So, wins: 93 and a playoff spot. Eleven wins better than last year? Well, if the stars and the stars on the IL align...

    Rodent, though: yuck. 7 wins, and that's being generous. He'll likely end up on the IL again for an extended period, hiding from the spotlight that shows what an arrogant, macho fraud he is.

    But Soto is playing for the money, so he'll blinker himself against the bumbling organization and hit for personal numbers. Meaning 47 HRs, if not more.

    And for the hell of it, Volpe will hit a lot better than last year. Maybe even .250! (Gasp)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I refuse to remove my rose-colored glasses. Hence:

    92 wins thanks to the last minute addition of Trevor Bauer

    16 wins for Rodon

    38 HR for Soto (this vote has been influenced by others who think he will kick ass because of his expiring contract)

    ReplyDelete
  6. The new and improved, offensive New York Yankees, with a black hole of a pitching staff, will win

    80 Games

    Carlos the second coming of the Fat Toad will win 9 games

    And Juan, who will want a big contract from the Dodgers (who will borrow the money from Yamamoto to finance it) will hit 54 short porch solo screamers

    ReplyDelete
  7. 90 WINS
    CarLoss Wins 12
    Soto Hits 45

    ReplyDelete
  8. Wins: 103 (Up from last year)
    Rodon wins: 28 (Matching what will be our championship count)
    Soto Go-go's: 73 (One behind Judge)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Stang - Your numbers just made me giggle snort my oatmeal . . .

    ReplyDelete
  10. Is Stang a burner account for Ca$hman?

    ReplyDelete
  11. My predictions are the product of advanced metrics.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I've smoked some of those advanced metrics, Stang. They're damn good.

    Oh, and...because somebody should say it, RIP Peter Angelos. The man tried. And you have to appreciate that in an owner.

    Later today, Oh! Oh! Oh! Ohtani is speaking to the press about the whole gambling kerfuffle. He'll lie. And he won't actually speak to the press, except for the Japanese press present. He'll speak to the backup interpreter, hopefully not a close friend who'll place bets for him with illegal bookies in CA (where sports gambling is not yet legal). I also hope he takes care of his old friend who took the fall for him.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I’m gonna be slightly less optimistic and go for 90 wins, 11 for Rondon and 42 home runs for Soto

    ReplyDelete
  14. 93 wins, 9 for rodon, and 37 for Soto.

    So to get there in late-September
    Soto will have to take us there, but that's not just
    so, toe of Judge will be what gets us thru late-October.

    ReplyDelete

  15. Wins 83

    Rondon 6

    Soto 27

    We are doomed I tell ye dooooomed

    ReplyDelete
  16. Let’s Go Trippin’, :

    Wins: 85
    Rodon: 9 Wins
    Soto: 35 hrs

    Team gets final W/C, loses in first round.

    Biggest Disappointment: Cole (honorable mention: Judge)
    Biggest Surprise: Gleyber Torres (honorable mention: Oscar Gonzalez)

    Boone receives 2 year contract extension after the season.

    ReplyDelete
  17. LeMahieu to start the season on the IL

    “I’m shocked!” Said by: No one.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hey Hey Hey,,,, 88 for the Yanks, 8 wins for Rodon and 37 boom booms for Soto
    Let the PAIN BEGIN!

    ReplyDelete
  19. I reserve the right to edit these forecasts, if another Yankee goes to the surgical ward, prior to Thursday:

    Wins 82
    Rodon Wins 4
    Soto HRs 27

    ReplyDelete
  20. Wins=95
    Rodon=12
    Soto=42

    My annual rose colored glasses are in full Spring mode. Someday, they will seek and see the truth……

    On an unrelated note, Hey Duque, can we get a re- do in July????

    ReplyDelete
  21. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  22. For all the lamentations and vitriol that regularly appear on this blog, these predictions are surprisingly optimistic.

    There are fewer idiots, but the majority fall into the Hopeless Romantic category.

    Whoda thunk it?

    ReplyDelete
  23. 82 -- 3 -- 35

    Fool me 15 times and I get pissed at you!

    The 82 is generous only because there are so many patsies in the majors now. Soto walk year, so he'll (hopefully) ignore all launch angle/exit velo advice from the Yankee idiots.

    Stang either ignored the brown acid announcement and went for it, or Celerino is right. Either way, I'm concerned.

    (edited for coherence, not predictions)

    ReplyDelete
  24. I'm going to regret this by June, but here it goes:

    Yankee wins - 93
    Rodon "wins" - 11
    Soto Bangers - 39

    ReplyDelete

  25. Welp, I'll wade in

    Yankees - 86 wins
    Rhoda - 10
    Soto - 29 (he doesn't hit a ton of homeruns)

    ReplyDelete
  26. I managed to get one out of the three right! Volpe really needed more seasoning and his average reflected that. I did say Judge would go down with injury and that happened at 16 HR. I thought I would win that with my guess of 18 HRs! Dang! The Yanks were a better team than what their win total was and should have won more.

    This year I'm going 90 wins. They are basically the same team as before, but plus Soto and minus half a season of Cole. They'll win games via HR instead of via Cole.

    Carlos Rodon? Ugh. 6 wins and I feel that's probably too optimistic. He's really not THAT good of a pitcher. May need to convert him to a closer ALA Eck sooner rather than later.

    Juan Soto? 40. He could put up huge record Judge-like HR numbers but I have a feeling it's more likely that his strikeouts will climb to Judge-like numbers instead.

    90 wins - 6 Rodon Wins - 40 Soto HRs

    ReplyDelete
  27. 79 - Wins
    7 - Rod On Fire Wins
    37 -Soto Homeris Sui Generis

    ReplyDelete
  28. My Cat (AKA - Above-Average-Kitty) wishes to chime in with His/Their prediction/s:

    87 Team wins*

    10 Rodamn! wins*

    41 Soto SWANGS*


    * 33 - 05 - 19 if the world ends prior to the end of July

    ReplyDelete
  29. A lot of optimists here. Who'd a thunk it?

    Wins: 86 (with a lot of high scoring games the Yankees will lose)
    Rodon wins: 8 (I'm going on a limb here, maybe 4 wins and a stretcher mid-season)
    Soto HR's: 42 (and a one way ticket to LA)

    Other predictions:
    Percentage of roster sent to IL: 35%
    Number of times Boone will make excuses for management: 162
    Lonn Trost will say something derogatory about working class people.
    Randy Levine will say something nasty about Soto's performance come contract time.
    Yankees will lose in the wild card one-off and Cashman will claim victory
    Hal will keep on counting his money and buy another European soccer team with the winnings.
    Monty will hold the Yankees to 2 runs or less every time he pitches against them. Cashman will say nothing. Boone will make excuses.

    ReplyDelete
  30. To paraphrase a certain rock band of my youth, I don't get fooled again.

    I wanted to go with 77 wins last season, but was dissuaded by the apparent weakness of the league. Now, I see that doesn't matter. To borrow an adage from politics, you can't beat somebody with nobody. And I foolishly thought all major-league teams would have fences that didn't give way. So...

    2024: The year the wheels come off.

    Yankees—69-93.
    Rodon—5 wins.
    Soto—33 homers (Yes, it's a walk year, and once Judge and Stanton go down again, they'll just keep walking him.)

    Further predictions:

    Judge—32 home runs, in 102 games.
    Stanton—Thanks to his new conditioning regimen, his average does NOT drop by another 20 points, but rallies to .195 or so.
    Volpe—.201, with less power, as the strikeouts and the frustration mount.
    Rizzo—At least 30 games missed with tight lats, or light bats, or whatever.

    Sevvy in Queens wins more games than any Yankees starter.
    No Yankee in the "super-charged" bullpen will compile more than 12 saves.
    Andujar gets more hits that both of the Oswaldii combined.

    Time to party like it's 1965, people.






    ReplyDelete
  31. From Bryan Hoch:

    The Yankees' roster appears set for now, barring a trade involving Jahmai Jones or Ben Rortvedt. Both are out of Minor League options.

    P (13): Beeter, Burdi, Cortes, Ferguson, Gil, Gonzalez, Hamilton, Holmes, Loaisiga, Rodon, Schmidt, Stroman, Weaver

    C (3): Trevino, Wells, Rortvedt

    IF (4): Cabrera, Rizzo, Torres, Volpe

    OF (5): Grisham, J. Jones, Judge, Soto, Verdugo

    DH (1): Stanton

    ReplyDelete
  32. Gentlemen and Ladies:

    There has been a lot of questionable talk here today about there being a lot of questionable talk here today regarding all the optimism being expressed within the numbers of the predictions made by everyone invested here within the world of IIHITFITC.

    Allow me to respectfully point out to each and everyone tuning in - that regardless of how terrible Cashmund and the weird little Steinbrenner Twink have been in their god awful day to day, hands-on oversight of the operations of these, OUR NEW YORK YANKEES - that WE - US- YOU and ME are the biggest fans of this team and (choking back a few tears) are forever hoping that we do better and exceed our expectations to win it all and make our aging and fading selfs once again find some joy in all that we've invested over the years in our team1

    WE WANT TO FEEL THE UNBRIDLED JOY OF WINNING IT ALL ONE MORE TIME WITHIN OUR LIFETIMES!

    So even if we chose over 70 wins with this 2024 team, it is because we care so very much.

    Embrace the optimism - Hug the Joy - Kiss the lips of the possible World Series Champions!

    Only by all joining together do we stand a chance of experiencing Victory!

    It is a better choice than collapsing in a dusty mound of decomposing death and despair.

    Thank you!*


    (Not reviewed or corrected by a proper proof read so please feel free to point out any issues with the cobbling of this message if you choose to)

    ReplyDelete
  33. 81wins, and they pop champagne at the end of the season that they kept the “no losing seasons!” Streak going.

    14 wins for Rodon. But Cole doesn’t come back, Nestor struggles and the rest of the staff is a mess.

    38 home runs for Soto. Only 77 RBIs, though, because nobody gets on base.

    ReplyDelete
  34. 89 wins for the team, 11 wins for the Rodon, and 31 HRs for the Soto.

    I'm taking the over on how many times Cashman, Boone, and Steinbrenner are cursed on this blog during the season. I don't care what the number is - I'm taking the over.

    ReplyDelete
  35. 80 win season for the Yanks

    8 measly wins for Rodon

    36 HR for Soto

    Almost missed this lottery. Good thing I checked in today! Hey, ya gotta be in it to win it!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Oh yes, more predictions: Judge only 28 HR, because he has an injury-riddled year. And Volpe hits .255 with less uppercut. Cole misses the entire season with the barking elbow, then does surgery in the winter and will also miss the entire 2025 season.

    ReplyDelete
  37. 88 wins, 188 groin pulls, ACL tears, Tommy John surgeries, sore toes, and hurt feelings. Rodon ten wins, Soto 51 taters

    ReplyDelete
  38. Yankees win 97. Rodon wins 10. Soto hits 36 hrs. I know, I know... very optimistic.

    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.