Bud Selig Voices Concern As Beer Sales in Emerging Markets Go Flat

After addressing the need to move the Red sox out of New England, and into Mississippi, special President-elect appointee Alphonso met for his first security briefing with MLB Commissioner, and Milwaukee resident, Bud Selig.

Mr. Selig began the briefing with a new twist on an old joke: " A Russian, a Brazilian, and a South African walk into a bar and none of them orders a beer...."

Bud could tell I didn't get his drift, so he went on to explain that, in this global economic crisis, beer is now considered a luxury item in emerging countries. In Bogata, Columbia, for example ( from which Bud had recently returned ), patrons are ordering "guardiente " instead of beer. It is cheaper and they get drunk faster."

After expressing my praise for the Columbian imbibers, I pointed out that beer has become a luxury item in Yankee stadium, as well.

Bud then terminated the interview and showed me to the door. Apparently, his respect for my new office in the Government didn't extend to my commentary on the massive economic ripoff to the taxpayers of the new Yankee Palace.

So I went to a local Chinese bar and oredered a flagon of sorghum wine for fifty cents.

Alphonso Policy Statement 2 : we need to support the beer industry. Without affordable beer, there is no baseball.