Thursday, November 8, 2018

If it's true that Bryce Harper can play first base, the Yankees must jump into the bidding

Over the centuries, we've seen enough of "super-agent" Scott Boras' to know that his greatest skill is polishing turds until they look like freshly mined nuggets of gold. But sometimes - such as in his warnings this week that the greatest threat to baseball are greedy owners who purposely tank their teams - the turds carry weight. And today, the Yankees should carefully consider another Boras claim that is making the rounds: 

That Bryce Harper can and will play first base.

Like the hosts of Fox & Friends, Boras was addressing the world but targeting only one man, a millionaire at birth whose ascension to power defies the norms of both morality and Darwinism. Of course, he was speaking directly to Hand-Me-Down Hal Steinbrenner, who is clutching the purse strings on not only the 2019 Yankees... but the long-term future of the franchise.

All that is happening - the lifetime "Mr. Congeniality" contracts to Brett Gardner and CC Sabathia - revolves around Hal's willingness to spend money this winter. The Yankees stand as the only team capable of beating Boston in the 2019 AL East, but not if the Redsocks continue to spend nearly $40 million more on annual payroll. Hal can talk about frugality until the turd looks like chunks blown from King Midas, but it will still stink. Without a sizable spending surge this winter, the Yankees next summer will be contending for the Wild Card, while Boston chases its place in history. 

The Redsocks have built a team and system capable of winning two or three straight championships, creating a dynasty that will never be topped in our lifetimes. I want you all to think about that. If Boston goes on a three- or four-year roll, we will go to our graves as also-ran chumps, punching bags and punch lines to Boston's magnificence... 

Which brings me to Bryce Harper.

If it's true that he can play first base - (and here, I defer to the scouts, who know more than I) - then Boras' turds words must be met with keen interest. Supposedly, Harper always wanted to play for the Yankees. Maybe this is just Boras stirring the pot, trying to rouse another bidder. But at 1B, Harper represents a perfect fit for the Yankees. He is a lefty masher, a hard-edged player, who would immediately give us a Big Three in the lineup - (actually, a big four, if you consider Miguel Andujar). If we think about it, he's a better long range fit than Manny Machado.

Even if we even choose to ignore Machado's dirty play and lack of hustle - (of which he, amazingly, seems proud to acknowledge; how stupid is that?), there is a serious question about how he would fit into the long term Yankee plans. Yes, he'll fill the immediate void left by Didi Gregorius' injury. But when Didi returns, what then? Does Manny move to third, knocking Andujar to the outfield or - gulp - first base? And who is our big lefty threat? Gardy? Ellsbury? Luke Voit? Seriously, folks, on a long-term basis, Manny makes no sense.

But if Harper can play first, the Yankees can find a stopgap SS-2B until Didi returns - there are several candidates - and slot Harper into a position where he is likely to eventually end up, anyway. If Harper devotes himself to the position, he could play there into his late thirties and cut wear-and-tear on his body. 

The key here is that Food Stamps Hal needs to open his precious fanny pack. The Yankees seem to be pooh-pooing Boras' claim, conveniently suggesting there is nothing there. This is no time to be cheap. 2019 will be the final year of a decade in which the Yankees never even played in a world series, the first time that's happened since they were called the Yankees. If Hal wants to save nickels, he should annex the team's bottle deposits concession. 

If Bryce Harper wants to be a New York Yankee, and he's willing to make a full-spirited change to first base, we better take it seriously. And Hal needs to SPEND SOME FUCKING MONEY. 

14 comments:

  1. How can they turn their backs on a left handed hitter of his magnitude? They don't need Gary Sanchez II Machado with a right handed bat. If they don't roll over that fake limit of $206 this year than last year was a total waste of time!! Last year Hand Me Down wanted to lower the payroll so they could be aggressive this year. Reasonable approach. Well we didn't know his leave "no stone unturned" strategy was to gift $15 million to two broken down veterans? If he was so pissed at losing to the Red Sox he should have said something like we will come out with all guns firing this year. He should be saying we are going to blow past $206 and maybe $228. No, he says I will consider every proposal that crosses my desk! Arrrgh. He and Coops are made for each other.

    They need Corbin, Happ, Harper and Robertson. That's only $74 million for a $4 Billion with a B corporation. Please help me stay a Yankee fan!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hear, hear!

    it is sickening to see the bosocks beat the Yankees at their own game. Hal should just sell the Yankees and buy the KC Royals. Bank the cash and then play Scrooge McDuck while thrilling local fans with one WS win every 30 years.

    ReplyDelete
  3. you know, I'd take a one year rental on the Klubot as long as we don't do something stupid, like trade Miggy Mantle.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kluber has one year and two options. Basically if picked up, he’s getting $50 million over 3 years. I’d do that in a heartbeat

      Delete
  4. Ice Cream Sandwich is having shoulder surgery. Not his throwing arm. Just something that's been bugging him for two years, off and on.

    And so it goes.

    ReplyDelete
  5. CC says this is his last year.

    If we sign Machado, and I would hate to, Didi gets traded once he's healthy. Problem solved.

    Harper at first, if he's at all good at it defensively, would be excellent.

    I'd still like to move Hicks and get Red into the everyday lineup. I realize this is a pipedream.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Is there anyone who can get the message of this posting to Hal Steinbrenner? Can it be printed out and slipped to him while he's on his yacht by one of serfs or lieges? Seriously, it makes too much sense for the Yankees not to use their financial might to get Harper to play first base. Can we rent a plane with a banner, and fly it over the Tampa headquarters of Prince Hal, with the message: "Hal! Sign Harper! Beat the Red Sox or "Hal! Be a Hero! Sign Harper!"

    As a measure of my commitment to this approach, I will throw in $50.00. F**k cancer, homelessness, hunger and other worthy causes. This gets priority with me.

    ReplyDelete
  7. "UNKNOWN"

    YOUR OPENING POST SHOULD BE GOLD PLATED, AND PLACED GENTLY IN THE IIHIIFIIC ARCHIVES.

    "IF THEY DON'T ROLL OVER THAT FAKE LIMIT OF $206 MILLION, THAN LAST YEAR WAS A TOTAL WASTE OF TIME!"

    EXACTLY....

    ACTUALLY, WE HAVE BEEN CHINTZING AND CHISELING SINCE THE BRIAN ROBERTS, AND STEPHEN DREW DAYS....AND THAT'S QUITE A LONG TIME.

    WHAT A FU@KING DISGRACE.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I vote we do a Movement right out of LBJ’s playbook. How about Yankees fans far and wide send $20 each addressed to Hal at YS3, care of B Harper?


    If a million people do it, it’s 20 million. If two million do it, it’s 40 million. We as the fans would basically pay for the first year of Harper to spare the fanny pack of Schillings and Pence from going empty.


    This just makes too much sense.

    ReplyDelete
  9. YES! Get Harper, get Machado, get more pitchers!

    Bata indeed! We desperately need players.

    Sure, both those guys come with risks. So does everything else in sports, and life.

    You know what is NOT a risk? You know what is a sure-shot, lead-pipe cinch?

    Gardy, CC, and Hansel & Gretel are NOT going to take the Yankees anywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  10. KLUBER (VIA TRADE)

    SEVERINO

    TANAKA

    HAPP

    CORBIN

    CC

    IN THE WINGS:
    LASAGNA
    MONTGOMERY

    I AM ASSUMING JUSTUS, CLINT, AND MORE ARE GOING FOR KLUBER. (GOD FORBID ANDUJAR).

    THAT IS A PRETTY SERIOUS ROTATION.

    DON'T FORGET HARPER TOO!

    CAN'T WIN WITH HARDLY ANY LEFTIES IN THE LINEUP!...

    SIGN ANDREW MILLER TOO.

    LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, YOUR DIVISION WINNING 2019 NEW YORK YANKEES.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Mark my words, next year Greg Bird will have a year every bit as productive as Harper's.

    Pitching is what's needed. A No. 1 and a No. 2. And more relief pitchers, the best relief pitchers. And a manager who can get to October with a pitching staff whose arms are still attached to their shoulders.

    Another wild-swinging homer addict does not solve the problem.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I hate Cashman. I'm driving over to his place to take a crap on his porch. Who's with me?

    ReplyDelete

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    ReplyDelete

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