Saturday, January 11, 2020

Maybe, just maybe, the Yankees should keep J.A. Happ

Two years ago, in the shart of late July, the Yankees traded Luis Rijo (now 20) and Tyler Austin to the Twins for Mr. Lance Lynn, the kind of venerable rag arm that IIHIIFIIc readers love to berate. And Lance didn't disappoint us: He delivered 54 innings with a lousy 4.14 ERA. The following winter, we curtsied as he walked out the door. 

Lynn signed with lowly Texas and, at 32, posted his best year since 2012. For a crapola team, he won 16, and pitched 208 innings with a 3.67 ERA. In 2019's cruelest moments, the Yankees were said to be on the verge of trading for him again. (By the way, Lynn's numbers would have made him, by far, our "ace;" James Paxton threw only 150 IP with an ERA of 3.82.) 

I mention Lynn because, for a month now, the Yankees have apparently been dangling J.A. Happ - and his $17 mill salary - to anybody willing to pallet him. The argument: We have Gerrit Cole, Luis Severino, Paxton, Masahiro Tanaka, the combo of Jordan Montgomery/Domingo German and the entire 77,605 pop. of Scranton, Pa., each of whom can be conscripted, according to the secret Yankee operating agreement with that great city. (Note: The people of Wilkes Barre are not included; Moosic remains in question.) 

As strong as this 2020 rotation could be, unpleasant question marks remain. Tanaka is returning from arthroscopic surgery on his elbow. The docs removed bone spurs - you know, the things that kept Dick Cheney from being able to enlist five straight times. Montgomery missed virtually all of 2019 from TJ surgery, and German will miss half of 2020 because he apparently didn't didn't miss when swinging on his lady. 

For weeks now, the line has been that Brian "Cooperstown" Cashman will package Happ with Clint Frazier - the Yankee prospect with no Yankee prospects - for somebody, anybody, who will finalize the Death Star roster. Apparently, Coop hasn't found a mark team willing to pay. Maybe he never will. 

Happ recently turned 37. Let's face it: He's not worth $17 mil. But he's been to the fair. He plodded around for most of the 2010s before figuring out how to pitch in 2017. If we bundle him with Frazier, or a younger prospect, will we receive solid value? What are the chances that, come July, rumors will be flying that Cashman is working on a trade for him, having blown through Scranton's first 707,604? 

Of course, this conjecture doesn't matter a whit. What matters is the number that Hal Steinbrenner scribbled onto a cocktail napkin, signifying the family's comfortable payroll, which - following yesterday's arbitration settlements - now hovers somewhere north of $260 million. In any salary dump, we should steel ourselves for the worst. Happ for next to nothing.

But Prince Hal seems to be going all out in 2020. Watch that word: "Seems." I believe myself to be an optimist: I think Hal realizes that the Yankees' choke hold on NYC is tenuous, and that another decade without a ring could undermine the team's greatest asset: its historical legacy. The Boston Celtics were great once. So were the Cleveland Browns, Montreal Canadians, Syracuse University football, UCLA basketball and Hobart Lacrosse. In many ways, the Yankees need a world championship more desperately than any other team in baseball. The Mets came very close to winning the tabloid back pages of 2019. This might be a good time to bite the bullet, pay the luxury taxes, and show a little faith in J.A. Happ. Just sayin.' 

(Note: I just returned from a National Lampoon family vacation in Iceland, which is why I'm catching up here. Not a lot of Yankee news in Iceland, but take my word: It is an incredible place to visit. I saw geysers, soaked in outdoor hot springs, visited a museum dedicated to the phallus - I literally saw Moby's dick - ate disgusting bits of fermented shark, and drank at a bar devoted to the Big Lebowski. Trust me: The dudes of Reykjavic abide. If you ever get the chance, forget the midnight sun and go there in mid-winter. Just dress warmly and always leave yourself open to the chance that travel will be impossible.) 

9 comments:

  1. Keep Happ, trade Scranton.

    That just might work.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, JM. I have felt that way for a while.

    ReplyDelete
  3. YES! I have been arguing this for weeks now, but it's great to have our Peerless Leader—now ready, rested, and frozen—confirm my hunch.

    To reiterate: Happ has generally pitched very well for the last five years now.

    Apparently, once he started ignoring BoJo Rothschild and reverting to what came naturally last year, he killed: 1-0 September with a 1.65 ERA in 5 appearances and 4 starts, 28 Ks against only 9 walks. Only 18 hits in over 27 innings. He had been surrendering 5-6 homers a month; it September, he only gave up 2.

    Now that BoJo has returned to England to implement Brexit, there's no reason to think Happ can't be the guy who looked so good for us down the stretch in 2018.

    I mean, all we are talking about is someone most likely in the No. 5 slot here. Seems to me he could be the best No. 5 starter in the league.

    And we want to float somebody a top prospect, as well, just to take him off our hands???

    I can only quote Gen. McAuliffe (Anthony, not Dick) at Bastogne: "Nuts!"

    ReplyDelete
  4. Moosic remains in question.

    Truer words, truer words.



    Fuck you to hell Hal, you goat-blowing asshole.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Per your suggestion about going to Reykjavik in mid-winter. I spent 4 days in mid-December. The breeze is stiff and the rain is heavy, on the other hand the days are short so you don't feel bad about drinking during daylight hours.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I hear that there are no mosquitos in Iceland. That is reason enough to go.

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  7. Zow, Duque, National Lampoon!! One of my greatest reading pleasures of the 70's was reading NatLamp. I own the first hundred issues - - one of the best of my many collections cluttering my house.

    That reminds me, I once read in a bio of Hart Seely that some of his contributions to that venerable mag were worth tracking down and re-reading. Can you, perchance, clue me into which issues contain Our Leader's words of wisdom?? Gracias. LB (No J)

    P.S. Iceland sounds fabulous to this summer-despiser, for whom the Yanks serve as a potent distraction from the pain of heat & humidity...AND mosquitoes.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I was in a bunch of Lampoons. Long, long ago. I'll try to fish them out of the boxes someday and maybe post one.

    ReplyDelete

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