Crapping the bad: Yanks pick Buffalo and the Blue Jays for sloppiest game of 2020

Rather than relive the complete agony of last night's 14-1 Yankee debacle - a loss with genuine playoff implications - Sherman, set the Wayback for the bottom of the fourth/top of the fifth - arguably the worst inning of this miserable season.

In the fourth, we're down just 3-1, Masahiro Tanaka gives up a solo HR to Danny Jansen, a weak-hitting catcher whom the Yankees cannot solve. Next, Craig Biggio's kid hits a grounder that Cruel Hands Luke Voit bats into right center. Single. Ruled too hot to handle, a friendly call by the official scorer. 

Then Luke botches a pick-off attempt. The ball clanks off his glove and rolls 20 feet. He fetches it, and his throw to second beats the runner. It bounces off Gleyber Torres's glove. Three fuck-ups on one runner. But wait, there's more. 

Bo Bichette walks. The next guy hits a DP grounder to Gleyber, who waits on the hop, and the relay to first is late. A force out, another reprieve granted by the Yankee defense. Randall Grychuck singles, making it 5-1, and a tight game just flew out the window.

In the top of the fifth, the Yankees outdo themselves. Clint Frazier walks, and DJ LeMahiue singles. Two on, no outs. Aaron Judge draws a walk on a questionable 3-2 call. On YES's virtual strike zone, it looked like strike three, but we'll take it - especially since Judge has done almost nothing since returning.

Bases loaded, no outs, heart of the order coming up. Most pivotal moment in the game thus far. Giancarlo Stanton fans on four pitches. Voit pops out. Gleyber flies to right. (In the early innings, we scored on a similar situation because of a passed ball; we almost got a wild pitch here, but Jansen blocked it.) 

Okay, so it's a stinker, right? Every team has them. While I missed the radio broadcast driven by Jeep, I am sure that John Sterling made two critical points: 

1) That it's only ONE game in the loss column, ONE game.

2) Unlike other sports, tomorrow's game will have different pitchers, and thus be an entirely different battle. 

This is supposed to lift our spirits.  

Well, here are some reality checks.

1. The Yankee IF has two major defensive liabilities: Gleyber at SS and Voit at 1B. If the season were longer - that is, if the season were normal - we would have to in July find a SS, switch Gleyber back to 2B, move LeMahiue to 1B and make Luke the DH. (This would force Stanton to play LF or - better - the Yankees to eat his contract in a trade. Remember how the world accused Derek Jeter of helping his old team with the Stanton salary dump? They don't say it anymore, do they?)

2. Gary Sanchez is NOT on the verge of, any minute now, breaking out. When it comes to Sanchez, the Yankees sound like a doomsday cult, constantly looking for signs that the end is near. If Sanchez draws a walk, the YES team says this could be JUST THE WALK that he needed to get back on track! Long ago, Sanchez morphed into a John Mayberry-as-a-Yankee territory: The point where the aging slugger's HR is a bad thing, because it assures him another 100 at bats before the Yankees make a move. Sanchez needs a new team, a new town, a new position maybe. This isn't working. Kyle Higashioka should be our starting catcher. It's that simple.

3. Tanaka might rise to the occasion in Game Two of the playoffs, but who knows which version will show up? We have Gerrit Cole and a handful of dice. And the "bridge" to our late inning bullpen - itself, sketchy - is a mine field. Luis Cessa, Tyler Lyons - dear God. Last night, David Cone opined that the Yankees might end up pitching Eric Kratz in a post-season blowout. (By the way, Kratz pitched last night, of course.) Can you imagine that? The YES men are actually suggesting that a position player will pitch next week, when the Yankees are so far behind that they want to - gulp - save Jonathan Holder? Wow.

Last night, I had an epiphany. It dawned on me that all I really want is for this season to end. You want to talk about signs? That's a bad one.