Old Fred Nietzsche, between migraines, once said, "If you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you." That about sums it up. Since Dec. 2, we have stared into a bottomless black hole - the hearts of the billionaires who own baseball. Now, I'm not ready to don their swag, to carry their water, to pretend it didn't happen.
Somehow, baseball's fan base must let them feel our fury.
Opening day is is April 7. We need a presidential address from the flatbed of a truck.
But where were we?
Last I remember, the Death Barge - that's what we call it - was gaslighting us into thinking it might sign Freddie Freeman. The Yankees were prepared to "go all in." That usually means placing second; the franchise is happy to chase wild cards.
The Mets were methodically taking over NYC, and Hal Steinbrenner was doing yoga, or learning canasta, or buying another superyacht - whatever the fuck he does when not improving his baseball club.
So... where were we?
Well, with 27 days until launch, the Yankees have:
a. No firstbaseman beyond Luke Voit, a DH.
b. No shortstop beyond Gio Urshella, a 3B.
c. No centerfielder beyond Aaron Hicks, until he gets hurt.
d. No catcher beyond Gary Sanchez. 'Nuff said.
e. No rotation after Gerrit Cole and Jordan Montgomery.
f. A closer facing the twilight season.
g. A creaky bullpen.
h. An owner who voted against his franchise's self-interest during the lockout.
i. Brian Cashman, entering his 25th year as GM.
j. A fawning broadcast outlet that critiques players without ever holding management accountable.
k. No rookie, not one, ready to make an immediate impact.
l. Joey Gallo.
And here we go...
(Gulp)
ReplyDeleteBrian and Hal will blow this. Just like they've blown the last 12 years.
ReplyDeleteYes, they blow. Unless Hal opens that change purse where the moths fly out, we're in for a long season.
Which nobody is going to pay attention to, anyway. Except to listen to the Master and Suzyn. Every season might be their last.
How quickly a healthy Lucky Luis Severino is forgotten!
ReplyDeleteHal, Brian and Boone - Lords of Nothing, losers, shlemiels, mediocrities...
ReplyDeleteI thought of Setback Sevy, but I fear it would cause a Setback.
ReplyDeleteYes, there are multiple problems. Who do we have to thank? Cheapskate Hal and Genius Cashman.
ReplyDeleteI feel much the same way, Duque.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, they are WOEFULLY unprepared. If they give that Story guy—a .241 hitter outside of the Rocky Mountains—a one-year deal, I will blow a gasket.
At first, even Rizzo would be an improvement over Voit. But watch him sign with the Sox instead.
And yes, Setback Sevy, last seen setting the world on its ear FOUR YEARS ago, is our best hope for a closer.
I hope we have nothing but trouble.
ReplyDeleteWe have Giancarlo. For twenty more years.
Is the shift still legal this year?
After Judge Gallo is our second best positional player. We need three more top-tiered players, another starter, and a couple more relievers. I was looking at the betting line that the NY Post published today. Have my mental facilities declined that sharply? Or are those betting lines made up for the homers?
ReplyDeletePS, this team is a mess.
Looks like a .500 team at best.
ReplyDeleteIf the farm system doesn't produce.....
ReplyDeleteStranger than fiction: the billionaires & millionaires actually worked it out. I'm glad I was wrong about the whole season going down the drain, but now comes the kick in the gut: the Yankees roster looks like something the cat dragged in.
ReplyDelete