Seven games into 2022, no lead is safe. None. Ever. Our superstar closer - in his contract year, no less - just showcased his uncanny ability to blow any game, at any moment, regardless of score, in less time than it takes Putin to bomb a day care center.
Last night, in case you missed the news, a team of scientists now claims life began on Earth 300 million years earlier than previous estimates, toppling consensus views of the past, Aroldis Chapman - the human water cannon of cascading perspiration - entered the game with no outs, the bases empty and a three-run lead. Ten minutes later, he left with no outs, the bases full, and multiple heart attacks among the few fans who remained. (A sorry sight, by the way: Have you noticed the sea of empty seats behind home plate? The Yankees should follow the Oscars and pay for photogenic seat holders to take up space. All that blue emptiness suggests that NYC could actually be a Mets town.)
As we did last night, entering the ninth.
But but BUT... we did get the DP, and Toronto got the plate of bad clams. Our bullpen has been a godsend. Six relative nobodies have yet to give up a run - (yeah, I know, small sample size) - against nasty lineups in tight games. The 28-man roster is our Queen Mother. When she ends May 1, we will probably lose JP Sears and/or Ron Marinaccio, even if their ERAs remain at zero.
But who closes when the closer can't close?
Can we ever count on El Chapo, especially in opposing parks?
Last night, the Yankees received a sharp electrical jolt, and all of baseball surely noticed: Their closer is compromised. Make him throw strikes. And no Yankee lead is safe.
Just one more season at most. He’s not here next season
ReplyDeleteYankees scored 4.39 runs per game in 2021.
ReplyDeleteThey're scoring 3.43 runs per game in 2022.
Maybe the Orioles pitching will make us look better.
May I say it was a Royal outing for Sir Michael? 3 outs on 5 pitches.
ReplyDeleteAs for Crapman, I hate long goodbyes; let’s deal him now. The more he implodes, the less return in trade we’ll receive.
Plain and simple, Chapman is a stiff.
ReplyDeleteThere has been a sea of blue seats almost since they created the moat.
ReplyDeleteRich patrons and corporate seats where the people stay indoors and eat lobster, then trail down for an inning or two.
After the 5th inning, any unused seats should be given to other fans in the Stadium.
At least then it will look filled.
ReplyDeleteAroldis Chapman struggling? Say it ain't so! Last year a miraculous triple play saved his bacon in a game against The White Sox in May. At least the miracle happened while he was on the mound. This year Chapman is in the dugout watching a rookie save his sweaty backside. How many more times are we going to have to endure this kind of nonsense?
Loved "human water cannon of cascading perspiration."
ReplyDeleteBut one small caveat, Duque: that was hardly a "line drive" DP; more a Mariano-style, humpbacked liner-pop up...which, incidentally, DJ made a helluva play on, judging the ball well, grabbing it, and making sure he had control before zipping a throw to first—where Rizzo had alertly returned.
Excellent play all around. A good, gritty win in which the Yanks were aggressive and did small, good things, such as bunt, and pulled our failing closer BEFORE he gave it all up.
Best game of the year so far, in many ways.
Just stoking the fires of discontent: from WFAN.com - “The Yankees are once again the most valuable MLB franchise, according to Sportico, which values the team at $7.01 billion. Putting the Yankees’ value into more perspective, that $7.01 billion makes them the most valuable sports franchise in the world, according to Sportico’s valuation, which includes a 2021 revenue of $531 million (well on its way to recovering from the COVID-19 pandemic, as revenue was at $702 million in 2019), and over $1 billion in real estate and related businesses.”
ReplyDeleteThis does not include revenue from legalized gambling, which seems to be a closely held secret among MLB teams.
BUT...yes, the fan torture MUST stop. It was pure greed by the Yanks to schedule this getaway day game at night, instead of in the afternoon, and pure greed for not compensating the fans who did stick around in some way.
ReplyDeleteJudge is the odd man out tonight…
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI had congestive heart failure 10 years ago. Was hospitalized, given Lasix for 3 days.
I went into that stay @ 212 pounds (I'm vertically challenge, btw). When I left, I was 193. Literally, peed out 19 pounds of water (which is what was clogging my lungs).
I'm wondering......does Chappie shed that much water in a single appearance like the one yesterday???
Sorry to hear that, Joe, but glad you survived.
ReplyDeleteAnd actually, Torrents sheds many times that amount of water. In ancient times, he was the watershed for the Nile Valley, and enabled the beginnings of Mediterranean civilization.
Happy holidays, all!
Simple sign of the season coming up…sweep Baltimore or be doomed to 80 wins.
ReplyDeleteSo is Donaldson going to start to hit at some point before his eventual season-ending injury, or what?
ReplyDelete@ Archangel....In 2009, the first year of the new YS, and right after the economic crash, most of the corporate boxes (over a thousand per seat) behind home plate were empty so the Yankees gave away thousands of tickets away per game, many to military personnel. I remember Howard Stern got seats right in the front row where the center field camera is always fixed on. So he had Baba Booey, "Gary the Retard", Beetlejuice and a few other whack pack people sit in those seats. During the game, they were all over the place flailing away, twitching, screaming, bobbing up and down to the point where Fox tried to cover them up with the box score/pitch info. But to no avail. It was actually very funny.
ReplyDelete@ Pocono Steve....I'd settle for Donaldson just making bat contact with the baseball. He's struck out at least 40% of his at-bats. He fits right in to the lineup.
MY GAWD, GALLO @^&*@(@!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI prefer the wine.
Damn is Hicks fucking pathetic!
ReplyDeleteMY GAWD, HICKS @^&*@(@!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete(speechless)
The Distressed Whale siren may be one of the funniest phrases I’ve ever seen on this interweb blog. I literally just shot Coca Cola out of my nose from laughing / choking so hard.
ReplyDeleteJesus, Duque. Absolute perfect ruin sir.
YS
* absolute perfection sir was that last line… still in hysterics hahaha
DeleteBoone finally taking out his Magic Wandy from the game.
ReplyDeleteI think this game might suck.
ReplyDeleteFUCKERS.
ReplyDeleteYankees suck Godzilla balls.
ReplyDeleteDamn am I watching the mariners or the Yankees 1 run lawd....
ReplyDeletefuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckersfuckers
ReplyDeleteAin't No Good Friday No Mo'
ReplyDeleteChapStick Time!
ReplyDeleteChappy got an ooot
ReplyDeleteme feels like I'm watching Lynch's dune!
ReplyDeletefuck
ReplyDeleteMotherfuckers
ReplyDeletewalking the line . . . . my recommendation is to leave him in Baltimore motel 6
ReplyDeleteWatching the boxscore scroll makes me so glad I got rid of the mlb streaming package.
ReplyDeleteOther than the horrid game, happy holidays to all that celebrate. For those that don't, cheers anyway.
Now off to some good Friday kvelte fish. Or maybe I'll just skip ahead to the good stuff.
Butchers Bill; 13 k’s 20 LOB. Only 1XBH in 11 innings.
ReplyDeleteLosing to the worst team in the league.
Embarrassing.
Pathetic.
Now the Birds are 2-5 after the debacle. Put the Yankee in a Stadium where they do not hit Homers and they are dead.
ReplyDeleteGlad I missed the game.
ReplyDelete20 LOB is shameful, but somehow, not unexpected.
Sure glad we got rid of those terrible hitting coaches and brought in these "state of the art" new guys.
It's been a long year already.
well at least we are No.1 at something-- The riches MLB franchise.
I think that I will celebrate with a $16.00 Stadium brew.
No need to worry, the next superstar is on the horizon.
ReplyDeleteVolpe is .381 in AA !!!!!!
Whoops, that's his OPS.
he's batting .125.
But in that fine 21st Century Yankee tradition, he has struck out 10 times in 24 AB.
Just working on his launch angle.
- - - at least KaBoone got tossed out of the, uh, post game jamboree in order to keep his catcher from getting tossed out - - - it could always be worse. We could all wake up with triple hernias from overnight rage snoring
ReplyDelete