Humanity was an offshoot of the Yankees, and as long as we won - or, at least, played - Armageddon would be postponed until tomorrow.
Then, over the years, puberty reality intervened. We saw baseball halted for labor strive, riots and even a pandemic. We watched our gods become flawed men and the Yankees become just another franchise. For nearly 15 years, they have come up short. Whatever magic once saved them, it's gone.
Then something happens like last night.
Okay, don't worry: I'm not going to wax drunkenly about the 2023 Yankees, who have a long way to go before making a flyspeck in Tampa's rearview mirror. But last night restored some of the lost luster of this troubled early season. It was the most joyous victory of the year. (Previously, that was last week's 9-8 win over the Rays, when we were down 6-0 with their ace, Shane McLanahan, on the mound.) Last night goes into the memory file because...
1. We twice came back from deficits that in recent years seemed insurmountable.
2. Aaron Judge's 9th inning, game-tying HR off Baltimore's closer. Increasingly, the world is realizing that Judge's 2022 was no fluke, and he is baseball's greatest slugger, and fuck off, Ohtani fans.
3. A walk-off hit by struggling Anthony Volpe, shortly after a great play at SS. Maybe - just maybe - this is The One.
4. We got to enjoy Anthony Santander - a Yankee killer - fouling one off his nuts. Hah. Today, they'll be the size of grapefruits.
5. Speaking of nuts, the squirrel...
More than a mere clip for Sportscenter, this once again reminds us of the vagaries of baseball humanity. Whatever hell is terrifying us lately - hurricanes, mass shootings, migrating hordes, Nazis, crackdowns on freedom - it doesn't matter to the real residents of 1 East 161st St. And it didn't mean squat to that squirrel.
Last night, there were peanuts to be gathered, foods to be scrounged. To the wildlife, it's just home. But look at the faces on those fans. They just realized how lucky we all are to be visitors to the greatest show on earth - life, itself.
Last night was a glorious one. Hey, juju gods, have another drink.
In looking at that photo clearly there is nothing more amazing on the face of G-d's great Earth, as that prince of foods... no sorry I got a little lost there...
ReplyDeleteClearly there is nothing so amazing on the face of G-d's great Earth, as a squirrel. Much like the Loch Ness Monster or Big Foot, these rarely seen creatures are mostly the stuff of legend. I'm thinking the picture was photo shopped.
As far as the game goes... You're right. Judge is starting to be one of those Yankees that can be mentioned years from now, when I'm sitting in a nursing home (Hart - See my e-mail to you from yesterday) and describing Don Mattingly's Consecutive Game Home Run Streak. An event that I followed closely in USA Today's box scores.
"What's that sonny? What's USA Today? It was a newspaper. What's paper? Well there used to be this plant called trees and..."
But I digress again. Watching Judge is really becoming something very special. And the kid comes through. Hence the higher AYG-HAB. He's going to get there.
Last,
I read today that Jackie has resumed baseball activities and should rejoin the team shortly. Boone said he will be back in the stating lineup. So here's an early AYG-HAB on that... ZERO. Zer-fucking-Oh.
Just when the team is starting to gel.
We really need to get him some power tools from that Chinese on line place (Temu?) that sells Jig-Saws for 12 dollars.
Yes, last night was a Yankee Classic...
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI was really happy with last night, until I came here and read the word "Jackie" in Doug K's post.
Now, I'm right back to being a crotchety old geezer. Thanks loads.
I picked a shitty game to miss. Dammit.
ReplyDeleteDoug,
ReplyDeleteI have an old chainsaw with no safety bar that I can donate to the cause.
I suggest that we either put a upside down rake in his yard or perhaps a flaming bag of dog poo.
ReplyDeleteHe will either give himself a concussion or tear an ACL stomping out the poo fire.
He can count his money during rehab.
Doug, you obviously believe that you will live long beyond your expiration date. !!!
I just want to make to each new day.
(I'm on borrowed time. I was given Last Rites once already, plus have beaten Stage 3 colon cancer.
You would think that I would be a nicer person, but you know, old dog, new tricks is an actual thing.)
BTW, are we concerned about the Rays still? The Blue Jays demolished the Rays 20-1 last night...
ReplyDeleteToo bad the Jays missed that extra point. Otherwise, nice job.
ReplyDeleteJackie really needs to be gone. On the bench is second choice. Starting lineup? No forking way.
Judge and the Kid were fun to see last night. In fact, "fun" is a word that goes with the team of late, which will come crashing to a halt with Assholeson back in the lineup. What we need is booing. Lots and lots of booing when he comes back. I think it does have an effect on the front office.
It's good to know that the Yankees aren't the only team that makes incredibly stoopid mistakes and blows games. The Orioles pulled one straight out of The Cuban Missile Crisis. 0-2 pitch to Judge, 1 out and nobody on base, and the bozo throws a hanging splitter right in the middle of the zone. With a 101 mph fastball, you'd think he'd throw high and out of the zone or bounce a splitter. As a great Yankee once said "You can't make that kind of mistake. This is the major leagues, kid." Now, let's see if their closer learns from that mistake, or if like the Yankees, he keeps making the same stoopid mistakes.
ReplyDeleteTampa Bay, blowing one up sky high, so high that it might have made escape velocity. They lost so bad that I'm not calling them the Tampons. That would be a low blow. Their only problem is that they're not playing the Yankees.
ReplyDeleteKing is our closer. Or should be.
ReplyDeletehttps://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/mlb/the-yankees-have-a-true-star-in-the-bullpen/ar-AA1bCRsk?rc=1&ocid=winp1taskbar&cvid=fa3d15c3f2ef45189d59b76cba6fa75a&ei=8
They were saying Volpe has a really good head on his shoulders, very mature, won't get too high or low, won't show up with a AR-15 if he goes 0 for 40. And that was one of the main reasons why he was promoted.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if hitting .200 can be called "struggling" on this Yankee team. Almost everyone hits under .200 here. The usual thing is for a Yankee batter to hit .180 with power. Ain't that the way their coaches want it? He's actually doing better than they expected.
There's nothing wrong what he's doing so far. I'd still take Volpe over Gleyber Torres.
Duque, another great post. I can’t say enough how much I enjoy the writing on this blog, even the small amount of posts I don’t agree with.
ReplyDeleteMan, that was an extra large meatball thrown to Judge in the ninth. But give him credit, he hit it outta there.
Big props for King’s outstanding relief work, and of course AV’s catch and clutch situational game winner.
Ah, but then there’s booner…I think he will insert Donaldson at 3B when he returns, not sure for how long. Remember in the Spring both he and the evil gnome in the F/O said Hicks would be the LFer, yet Cabrera was out there on opening. Boone just lies, gaslights, obfuscates, and when all else fails, he mumbles. When asked about DJLM near disastrous bunt attempt he mumbled something about having to see the tape and implied that DJLM did it all on his ow. Total Bullshit! In that situation, the manager calls for the bunts. I love small ball more than most, but DJLM is not the guy you want bunting there. That the team was able to hang tough and overcome this says a lot.
We should see some of the walking wounded back in June (Kahnle should be first). Is it crazy for me to think we should take a peek at Rortvedt? Is he really worse than what we’ve got? As for Florial, I guess enjoy the continental breakfast at the Super 8 Scranton and hope you get thrown into a deal at the T/D.
A great win!
ReplyDeleteProps to JM for the Assholeson name. I usually refer to him as a douche, which is quite fitting but a little simplistic.
ReplyDeleteLike our team of choice, you guys are en fuego today.
ReplyDeleteOh, and for things to booby-trap Donaldson with? How about floor pie? Worked on Homer Simpson.
Incidentally, a big, quick, gray THING suddenly in front of them? I'm sure those Yankee bravos thought it was a rat.
ReplyDeleteThat was a tremendous win last night, I'm almoooOOOost at the the point that I expect come from behind victories from this group,,,,,, And yes yes yes, you are ALL in midseason form for humor, slights and insights, LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd fuck off, Ohtani fans.
ReplyDeleteAmen.