Wow. I'm knock-kneed. My hands are shaking. Who'd a thought it: Three (3!) straight! That's the Bomber dynasty talking - Ruth, Gehrig, Joe D, Mickey, Reggie, Jeter and Calhoun - America's team, which exhibits total dominance when entering the squared circle against Oakland, the Masters of Moneyball. Three (3!). What a boner! Three! (3!)
Not only that, but by sweeping the A's, we'll be doing their owner - Harpo Fisher, who grew up to inherit The Gap - a billionaire-to-billionaire solid. We'll hasten his secret plan to tank the franchise and destroy the fan base, so he can move to Vegas - the city of boobs and barkers - and score a shiny new stadium from the taxpaying sons and daughters of the ex-showgirl gene pool. Win today, and we'll have done our part to bring MLB to the desert.
One problem, though, and it's why we have yet to win three (3!) straight in 2023. Though I don't mean to pick on any singular Yankee, the 3-4-5 end of our pitching rotation seems to be - well - limiting our winning streaks.
Domingo German and Clarke Schmidt have struggled to find consistency, unlike Jhonny Brito, who has been consistently bad. We can talk about that gaping hole in LF, where the rankings change each night - (Right now, I rank our top 10 leftfielders as 1. Jake Bauers, 2. Willie Calhoun, 3. Aaron Hicks, 4. Oswaldo Cabrera, 5. Isiah Kiner-Falefa, 6. Estevan Florial, 7. Jasson Dominguez, 8. Giancarlo Stanton - injured, 9. Brett Gardner, and 10. Your Name Here.)
So, today it's Brito. Not to pick on a rookie - he could be a useful bullpen lug nut - but this is why three (3!) remains The Impossible Dream. Hold onto your hat, everybody. To get to three (3!), we'll need to score a lot more than three.
With this rotation, it's amazing we can win two in a row. Three? I dunno. We'll have to put up double digits again to win with Brito on the mound.
ReplyDeleteAnd good for Jake. He got a chance, and he's making good on it. At least for now.
Oh, forgot.
ReplyDeleteBoone is an idiot.
I have to marvel at the advances in medical science.
ReplyDelete30 years ago a guy felt a twinge in his hip running the bases they would have told him to rub dirt on it and ice it after the game, cuz, you know, their paycheck depended on playing every day.
Now, with modern medicine, we know all about injuries to hip muscles we didn't even know existed in the 90s.
I suggest that the Yankees medical staff scout my 7 yr.-old. grandson's LL games. Somehow after ingesting corndogs, fries, gummy bears and copious amount of Gatorade, they have managed to avoid all leg, hip, trunk and head injuries this season. [FYI, the season starts in March down here.].
One of the kids took a one-hopper off the noggin and did not cry until between innings when his mom asked him how he was. The laces left a nice mark.
Hicks, Stanton,Donaldson, Sevy and Rodon could learn something from these kids
In other news, Bumbling, Bubbling, Seed-Spitting Loony-Boone will begin wearing specially designed slip-on baseball shoes during today’s game against Oakland. Apparently these will allow our slipper-skipper to redirect the brain power otherwise used for the tying of laces to other more pressing baseball management decisions.
ReplyDeleteArchie,
ReplyDeleteBallplayers used to be like old Chevys or Fords. You could whack a few things around and they'd run for another 20,000 miles.
You have to understand that today's ballplayers are finely tuned machines, complete with rear cameras, moon roofs, and navigation systems. One small glitch is enough to bring down the whole thing.
Doug, you reminded me of the powerful and nearly indestructible slant six engine (with optional push-button transmission) once available in cars such as the Plymouth Valiant.
ReplyDeleteNowadays most machines (and ball players) are objects of planned obsolescence, both by evolution and design.
I blame Hal and Cash.
Yes Doug,
ReplyDeleteAnd the repair bill, including diagnostics, is alway like the cost of the entire engine back when we measured horsepower.
Schmidt finally got a win, unbelievable! The offense finally woke up and scored some runs. Even got something called a "sac fly", an extremely rare specimen prized by entomologists who study the Yankees.
ReplyDeleteWith a better offense, this club wouldn't be in last place. The pitching hasn't been that bad. Last place is solely on the batters.
I had a (very used) Plymouth Valiant once! It was the only car I ever owned. Not pretty, but indestructible!
ReplyDeleteAnd the trouble is, Archie, that your grandkids don't spend their every spare moment in the weight room.
ReplyDeleteThe Yankees should be able to sweep a minor league team. How about the four game series with the Rays? How many games will the Yankees win?
ReplyDeleteMaster Bader looks like he can hit AAA pitching just fine.
ReplyDelete