Somehow, Gerrit Cole—a man I've long derided as "Flouncy," I will admit—pitched a two-hit, complete game shutout against a likely playoff team, the fearsome Toronto Blue Jays.
How is that possible???
As it happens, Cole threw just 105 pitches...and struck out just five BJs.
Again, I ask...how is that possible?
Could it possibly be that Cole pitched to contact, getting Toronto's bloated, buffoonish blowhards to hit the ball to Yankee fielders???
Lest you be worried that the globe has gone off its axis, most of the rest of the Yankees played the same way they have all year.
Their lineup—which included three "hitters" batting under .200, four under .210, and five under .215—produced the standard 13 strikeouts.
The one exception?
That Judge fella—the one man who said to the Yankees' crack(ed) crew of trainers and coaches, "Uh, no thanks, I'll do it my way"—and has put together some incredible feats of hitting ever since.
But again...
How is that possible???
Everyone knows that you have to pay rapt attention to the Yankees' coaches telling you to swing for the fences on every pitch, until you hear that certain something pop in your elbow.
(Incidentally, while I know it's a small sample size on one side, here is the comparison of Giancarlo and Florial, The One Man Who Struck Out Too Much Even for the Yankees:
Florial: 15 games, .250/.351/.354/.705, 15 Ks, or 1/game.
Stanton: 100 games, 100 games, .191/.275/.420/.695, 121 Ks, or 1.21/game.
Plus, Florial can still run and play the field.)
No, there is absolutely no way that last night's game was possible. It didn't happen. Strike it from your mind—it's a chimera, a hallucination caused by swamp gas, or the Northern Lights.
It's simply not possible.
Hoss...you can't predict baseball...
ReplyDeletePitching as we once knew it.
ReplyDeleteRight! And done...as what? A stunt to clinch the Cy Young?
ReplyDeleteWhy is this impossible if we've just seen it done?
I think he had nothing to prove, Horace. No pressure.
ReplyDeleteThe guy screws himself up in an effort to be perfect all the time and you can see in his body language that he's so hard on himself. With this miserable pitching staff and impotent lineup, he almost needs to be perfect every time out.
At some point in his career, he's going to have to pitch to contact as his velocity decreases with age. It might actually help him become a better pitcher. He came real close to a Maddux and I'm hoping for more such games from him in the future.
And thanks for the comparison. I hope Florial's here to stay. I'd like to see what he can do with a full season up here. Knowing The Intern though, he'll probably trade him for a washed up, expensive has-been.
Old blowhard ketchup purveyor skirt Schill announced that Tim Wakefield has (apparently stage IV) brain cancer. To which the carmines PR machine replied, STFU asshole! Wakefield didn't want the news out.
ReplyDeleteSince it is out, I have to mention that a former coworker lived in his neighborhood and said he was genuinely a good guy. Used to chat him up whilst pumping his own gas at the corner kwik-e mart. Would have rookies live in his house (rent-free) if they had nowhere to stay. Just a good guy that didn't deserve to have to wear the carmine hose.
One of the very, very few carmines that I don't despise. Too bad it couldn't have happened to a magic-shake drinking asshole instead of him.
Remember - that could have been Cole’s last start as a Yankee
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteYes, I was worried about that as well, and as I understand it Cole has an opt out at the end of this season does he not?
I am pretty sure he could get more money if he used it and notwithstanding that could you blame him if he wanted to move in order to win a World Series as I don't think he has much chance at the Yankees unless there are major changes throughout the organisation
Shame to hear about Wakefield. I remember when he broke in with the Pirates. At least he got a couple rings with the Carmine Hose.
ReplyDeleteCole would be very foolish to not take the opt out.
ReplyDeleteStarting for the first place Texas Rangers is Jordan Montgomery, who has struck out 161 in 186 innings .
ReplyDeleteKid’s got a pretty good curve. Think we could have used him this year?
Fuck you Cashman, you illiterate gofer boy
ReplyDeleteFuck Schilling, nothing stops a man like that from making the news. Terrible news about Wakefield.
ReplyDeleteCole’s opt out is AFTER the 2024 season.
ReplyDeleteSo, about last night.
ReplyDeleteTexas leading 2-1 in the home ninth. Who comes on and loads the bases with no outs? Which eventually leads to Seattle walking off with the win?
Thank you Aroldis. It was excruciating watching you torture someone else.