For years, the Yankee bench has been a silent problem. Nobody wished to speak its name. The YES men and the Gammonites kept strangely quiet. But whenever a Yankee plopped his tender tush into place, you saw the grimace and knew something was horribly wrong.
Splinters are part of baseball. If a butt wanders, it might as well be riding a porcupine. But new bench coach Brad Ausmus - announced yesterday - should bring stability, warmth, texture and a smooth-gliding comfort to the Yankee workbench.
Welcome, Brad, and happy Thanksgiving to all us turkeys, everywhere.
PS: Check out Alibi Ike's All-Thanksgiving Team, posted below, and add a few.
Aka Boone’s mid season replacement
ReplyDeleteWhich explains the new Yankees welcome, "Put your Assmus down on the bench."
ReplyDeleteOne thing I’m really thankful for?
ReplyDeleteThis blog!
Happy Thanksgiving to you all!
🦃🦃🦃🍁🍁🍁✨✨✨
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ReplyDeleteHappy Thanksgiving to everyone! You know, reading and writing stuff on this blog is one of the highlights of my day which sounds a lot sadder than it actually is.
ReplyDeleteThank you all and thank you El Duque (and the other founding fathers) for providing this place and fostering this community of true Yankee fans.
A Baseball Themed Thanksgiving Joke:
Ron Cey is driving to visit his relatives for a Thanksgiving dinner. Unfortunately, his car breaks down en route. He gets it towed and the mechanic tells him that he'll check it out but he needs around twenty minutes.
Ron decides kill the time by taking a walk and discovers that there is a mall with a Navy recruiting station and a 7-11 across the street and, even though it is cold out, being the end of November, he decides to go there and get some ice cream.
After all, his nickname is The Penguin and penguins love ice cream.
He quickly scarfs down a couple of Eskimo Pies, while still saving room for the pumpkin pies awaiting him at Thanksgiving dinner. It's kind of messy because Eskimo Pies don't have ice cream sticks.
Returning to the garage the mechanic sees him and says, "It looks like you blew a seal"
and Ron Cey replies, "No, it's just a little ice cream"
Long way to go for that, Doug. Loooooooonnnnnnng way.
ReplyDeleteBut happy Thanksgiving anyway!!
Hoss -
ReplyDeleteYes. Truly a long way. Had to add the Thanksgiving stuff because I said it was a Thanksgiving joke. It's really just a penguin joke but the punchline about blew a seal didn't make any sense for Ron Cey so I had to add the Navy (Seal) recruiting center. Looong way.
Then again, I don't have to be anywhere until later this afternoon and there's no football game on until 1PM so I had the time. :)
Happy Thanksgiving to all you huckleberries!
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteHappy Thanksgiving to all of you and thanks for letting me into your club. This is one of the places I look forward to coming to every morning.
I hope everyone here can take some time today to be thankful for what there is to be thankful for (besides waking up on the green side of the grass of course).
DOUG!!!!
ReplyDeleteGreat joke!
Happy Thanksgiving to all of my pinstripe brothers. What would my day be like without you all? As sad as Brian Cashman's dating life.
Well, maybe not THAT bad...
Do love that punch line, Doug.
ReplyDeleteThe Best, the Happiest of Thanksgiving to all of you!
ReplyDeleteHope everyone had a good Thanksgiving. Not even five o'clock and I'm ready for bed. But I have to stay awake for the pecan pie. That should give me a little jolt.
ReplyDeleteCashman should be thankful he has a job. Hal should be thankful for winning the birth sweepstakes. We should be thankful that we don't have to watch this crap team play all winter.
Looking forward to some PBA action and Mikaela Shiffrin skiing. Wonder when curling is on?
If Ron Cey and Willie Mays got married and adopted a child, would he or she be known as the Cey Hey Kid?
ReplyDeleteOkay, that was the cognac typing.
ReplyDeleteCarl - Your keyboard may be wet now so be careful
ReplyDeleteOh Cey, can you see?
ReplyDeleteOH OH Cey can you peee?
ReplyDeleteIn the Trough at the Ballpark?
(oh never mind - I don't wish for us to be viewed as un-American)
Happy Thanksgiving!!!