In recent years, one of my fave new words is "Frankenstein" - the verb - which means to assemble something with spare parts and a jolt of electricity, knowing that, in the end, will rise up and strangle you.
Which brings me to the '24 Yankees, with a pitching staff to be Frankensteined over the next eight weeks with scrap heap signings, salary dumps, an overpriced free agent and copious amounts of YES team hype.
This comes as the franchise seeks to recover from its stunning recent slap-down by Yoshi Yamamoto, plus the revelation that the Yankees' era as MLB's biggest fish has ended. The franchise will remain among the spending leaders, but it won't be top dog, not even in NYC. That ship has sailed, folks. The Yankees will be No. 2 in Gotham, with or without a workable Frankenstein.
With Yamamoto gone, Hal Steinbrenner has few options beyond overpaying for the free agents still out there. The Yankees could float a trade by bundling Oswald Perazza, a catcher and/or one of their few remaining prospects. This might bring a No. 4 starter, a bloated salary, a declining veteran or somebody recovering from a major tweak. Any trade is a roll of the dice. And the more that the Yankees deal young prospects, the more likely it becomes that they make a generational mistake and trade a future star.
Honestly, the prize tag for Yamamoto was flat-out amazing. We can say the Dodgers have ridiculously overpaid, those Hollywood happy fools. But now comes the part where everybody else follows suit. There's a new normal, and it means no cheap pitchers.
So, what should we expect? Here's a basic outline of what might happen.
Over the next eight weeks, the Yankees will...
1. Sign a veteran starter. It could be Frankie Montas, or somebody like him - recovering from surgery, trying to prove himself with a one-year deal. We'd like it to be Blake Snell or Jordan Montgomery, but the costs will make Hal flinch. (Also, we can all imagine Boston bidding up Montgomery, pleasing their fans by jabbing us in the eye.)
2. Sign an international free agent. No names here. They're too hard to spell anyway. He'll come from Japan, Korea or Cuba, and probably work in our bullpen. But I think Hal will bite on this. There are more future Yamamotos in the pipeline, and the Yankees don't want to be the lone big market team without an Asian star.
3. Sign one more hitter, an infielder. Matt Chapman, maybe? He's 30, a solid glove and conjures imagines of previous slugging 3B. (Graig Nettles, Scott Brosius.) Unfortunately, he hits RH. The Yankees have DJ LeMahieu, whose greatest value comes as an all-purpose infielder. If they trade Peraza, they could need a 3B. Wait... is Josh Donaldson available?
The Yankees were willing to spend $300 million on Yamamoto. They better be willing to spend as much on his Frankensteinian replacements.
Donaldson DID say he might play one more year so we could pick him up and have Blake ‘Shake and Bake’ him into a reliever.
ReplyDeleteTHIS IS GUNNA BE AN EXCITING THURSDAY AND FRIDAY!
Just you wait and see what ManCash does with Hal’s Pez dispenser of hope and dreams.
They aren't spending $300M on anything. It will dumpster diving as usual.
ReplyDeleteYep, Cashole led by Cheapskate Hal won't do squat other than trading away pitching on a one year rental, who will realize he's on the Titanic and sign with the most expensive lifeboat next off season
DeleteIt would be fair to say that the "ridiculous overspending" by the Dodgers has its origins here in the Bronx. George got that ball rolling, so we have no right to complain about high price tags. It's his son that deserves blame today for not following in his father's footsteps. This Yankee administration has plenty of money, they just have no idea how to spend it.
ReplyDeleteBut even more importantly, it's now clear to free agents everywhere that the Yankees are no longer a winning franchise. Yamamoto had this to say in his intro presser yesterday:
"Winning now and winning into the future was probably the most important thing in making this decision."
Translation: the Yankees are not winning now and into the future. They've had so many opportunities to sign the best free agents over the last ten years or so and basically stuck their heads in the sand and let teams like LA and Texas eat their lunch.
Hal Steinbrenner, the patron saint of mediocrity.
Trevor Bauer....
ReplyDeleteI don't think he's over the hill or 'done' enough for Cashole to bite
DeleteNone of this matters to Steingrubber. We know this because he doesn’t do anything about it.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, Cashman is already scrabbling away at the scrap heap like a starving racoon.
They don't have 300 million to spend elsewhere because they were never going to spend 300 million on Yamamoto. They knew that offer wouldn't cut it, and that the West Coast teams had a clear advantage. So make an offer, knowing it will never be accepted, and use it as "proof" that Hal is willing to spend.
ReplyDeleteHe's not.
That 300 million was vapor. And all the shirt rending, ash wearing, and breast beating after this year's crap season, including the bullshit "audit" that was a joke to begin with, was all a show--a p.r. stunt to quiet the critics and angry fans. The trade for Soto was Cashman shaking the bush, draining more young pitching for a one-year rental that won't change anything.
The Yankees should change their name to the Zombies (though nobody in the organization can sing like Colin Blunstone). The walking dead. A hollow shell with no plan for the future or the present.
And us fans? We're the guy in Night of the Living Dead who makes the right moves and somehow survives the zombie attack, only to be killed by an overzealous sheriff. Tragic. He--and we--deserved a lot better.
I don't know about the Yankees Frankensteining.
ReplyDeleteGiven Hal's track record it will be more like Draculaing, because whoever they get is going to suck.
I wish you could give like to comments here cuz this was a good one and hit the nail on the head
DeletePretty funny, Doug and JM. And I gotta agree with everyone here. The Yanks never had any notion of spending $300 million. They just consider themselves lucky that it wasn't YY's lifelong dream to play in the pinstripes. I do wonder how that second meeting YY requested went:
ReplyDelete"My new Yankees friends, I have decided to forego the larger offers from the Dodgers and the Mets, and accept your $300 million."
"Uh, Yoshi, about that offer..."
Yes, it's all a shell game. And the amazing thing is that the Yanks are trying to pull this over on New Yorkers. It reminds me of those guys who used to play three-card monte on street corners around Times Square. At least they were smart enough to go to Tourist Central. HAL actually thinks he can get away with playing us forever.
Horace - something tells me that somewhere in the ether is a bickering Smothers Brothers routine regarding the current state of these New York Yankees . . .
ReplyDeleteWhat a surprise, in the end - and all offers being relatively equal - Yamamoto chose the team with the best front office.
ReplyDeleteThe Yankees never had a chance.
I hope that's true, AA!
ReplyDelete