Friday, April 5, 2024

A star-crossed question from the Zone of Yankee Totality: Will Giancarlo become this year's Hicksie?

First, the obvious: It's too early to write Giancarlo Stanton's Yankee obit. Way too early. Let's save the funeral for, at least - say - April 20th. 

Badaboom. That's a joke. Seriously, everybody, Giancarlo will get about 140 plate appearances before the Yankees even think of punting on him. That outcome would likely include a fake stint on the Injury List. (MLB is supposed to be cracking down on bogus booboos, but who would doubt a Stanton injury? The guy strains something when he hiccups.) Either way, he's probably safe in the lineup through June. 

But 2024 could be remembered for the collision of two incredible celestial events. I'm not referring to the Great American Eclipse, which suddenly looks like a washout, but for two mammoth, star-crossed moments in future Yankee history.

1. The New Age of Yankee Giants - (that is, the ascension of Jasson Dominguez and/or Spencer Jones.)

2. The end of the Giancarlo Era.

Check their Paths of Totality. Dominguez might return from elbow surgery around June. He'd need a month in Scranton to shake off rust. By then, Jones would presumably have stomped Moosic to mush, forcing the Yankees to promote him. Either player's emergence could signal someone's Yankee doom.

Which brings me to Aaron Hicks. Last May 26, the Yankees jettisoned Hicksie after his entire game had seemed to disintegrate. He was rousing nightly boos along with the No. 1 pariah, Jackie Donaldson, hitting .188 and - especially distressing - covering LF like a leftover Covid cardboard cutout. No power, no average, no glove... no more Hicksie. The Yankees released him, he signed with Baltimore and immediately caught fire. Hicks eventually batted .275 with 7 HRs and helped guide the O's to a postseason where everyone shat the bed. (Note: He's now an Angel, hitting .167 with a HR; the Yankees will pay his salary through 2026.) 

We don't need another Hicks situation - especially one named Giancarlo, whose  contract runs into 2027, his 38th birthday. 

There is a point in many Yankee chronologies - a sad and horrible moment - when you start actually rooting against a guy, figuring he's beyond a comeback. It's not our finest moment, but it happens, especially with aging sluggers. They lose their edge, can't hit the fastball, and it's over - poof. They go from John Blanchard to John Mayberry. Happens to them all. The only question is how prolonged that final drought will be.

For Stanton, it could take a while. Our best scenario is for him to somehow stop lunging for breaking balls in the dirt, and to work himself back into prominence. Right now, he's the guy who hits a 500-foot HR every three weeks, and strikes out 50 times between them. He's already descending in the order. Unless he starts hitting, we'll soon see Soto and Judge as the everyday DH, with Trent Grisham in CF, and Gio waiting for ninth inning PH duties when Oswaldo or Trevino come up. 

Somehow - and I have no solution to this - the Yankees must keep Stanton from becoming this year's Hicks - that is, signing with a team that hates us and reviving his career, while we pay his ridiculous salary. 

Is there a way to do this? Or is it written in the stars? 

20 comments:



  1. Unless the big stiff is secretly an all-star catcher or he's working on a cutter that disappears to lefthanders no, there's no way out. Body's rusted through, frame's shot, leaks a quart of oil every week. Time to junk the old clunker.

    Stanton, Holmes, Cortes the (momentum) killer. Three holes in the dike.


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  2. His power bat and “star” quality will keep him playing. Eventually Boone will have to drop him in the lineup, probably to 6th.
    We all know the IL stint will be here soon enough. His release is coming, but not this year. Stanton is our own personal Kobayashi Maru.

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  3. Lasagna off the menu again. Now there's a surprise!


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  4. Stanton hit a HR, and my first thought was, "We've got this game in the bag and nobody was on base. How Stantonian." Another meaningless homer, just like the ones he hit in Miami for a losing team.

    He seems like a very nice guy and I don't doubt how hard he works to get back into (meaningless) form, but jeez Louise. He's already got more money than God and he's going to keep getting more and more for years, yet. Does he really need to embarrass himself like this?

    Besides, now that the PEDs aren't part of his workout regime, he's never coming back. He should know this from the injury-riddled, washed-up juicers who came before.

    What's the point?

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  5. Workout regimen. With an n. Kee-ripes.

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  6. It's never too early to write an obit. We are all finite, of that I am certain. Giancarlo is in decline. That's obvious. This will be his last year in The Show. Or next year will be. There is no shame in that. Age comes for us all. We lose our bat speed. We lose our plate discipline and coverage. It is inevitable. Do not disparage Giancarlo for that.

    I'm sure he must have other reasons to be mocked and disparaged.

    He will retire to the Jacoby Ellsbury Memorial Hot Tub in Florida and be festooned with aquatic fitness and swimwear models. Would that we all have such a pleasant foamy retirement.


    Fuck Cashbrain.

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  7. I said it before, I honestly think they’ll use Dominguez’s recovery as an excuse to slot him in as dh “until his elbow can handle throwing from the outfield” which will gradually phase Stanton into a bench role

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  8. Loaisiga to the 60 day IL.

    could be the last time we see him.

    Earthquake!

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  9. We just felt the earthquake here. Centered In Jersey. Why did it not take the Stadium down? Oh Juju gods, why have thou forsaken us?

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  10. 4.7 ?

    (that's sorta like trying to drink a steaming hot cup of Joe whilst blasting into Grand Central Station on a rush hour uptown bound 4 train)

    Early reports show little damage

    Eclipse coming

    Tensions OVER THERE a rising

    Cantrun and other mlb players on Ozempic

    Canadians at the stadium

    This must be the actual beginning of the End

    Get Hoss to a billionaire's bunker right away. He needs to survive the coming Purge so he can teach the survivors of the new world the mistakes that the old world made. Only in this way can the Cashmans and the Hals be avoided - giving way to a better future where peace and harmony and more level swings and good old fashioned country hardball pitching can thrive!

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  11. If Stanton has a future with Yanks, it's as a DH against lefties and pinch hitter. 250-ish ABs a year. That's if he is capable of producing something in that role. Worth the money? No. But they're on the hook for it anyway. Start platooning him now. See if it works.

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  12. Was that an earthquake or was it Bartolo Colon tripping and falling down the stairs?

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  13. It was Colon's colon after corned beef and cabbage...

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  14. They show the commercial enuf times...Stanton can benefit using WIN Reality VR Baseball...

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  15. It was Bartolo Colon and Sid Fernandez doing the Highland Fling!

    (With apologies to Scottish Yankee Fan.)




    Fuck Hal.

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  16. Let us examine this quandary using logic. All of you's say Stanton should be benched or put out to pasture, either now or after another appropriate period of gestation. And that would be the logical thing to do, if the franchise was actually trying to win a championship.

    But that's exactly it. This management stopped trying to win quite a while back. Ergo they will not bench Stanton. They will not bring up Dominguez or Jones because they are not "finished". They will never put Stanton out to pasture. He will play out the entire length of his dismal contract here. Doesn't matter if he hits .035 for the year. He will be in the lineup. They might drop him down to #7, but he'll be in there 'til his contract runneth out.

    After that, I would not be the least bit surprised if Cashman re-signed him to another four year contract. Finances are the name of the game here, not winning. It's got nothing to do with winning. Everything to do with money. If they won't re-sign Stanton, you can be 100% certain that they will scour the major league rosters for the next huge contract stiff that they can bring in here, someone to guarantee fiscal stability in their books and mediocrity on the field.

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  17. You may be thinkin', well if that be the case, then why did they ever get rid of Donaldson and Hicks? Answer: their salaries were small enough or their contracts short enough that they were considered expendable by HAL's accountants.

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  18. HAL plays a complicated game. Cashman is the genius of 4 dimensional chess. The problem for us fans is that none of the four dimensions include winning.

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  19. It is in the stars. He has been flailing ( and failing ) at outside, in the dirt, breaking balls for four years. It is not correctable.

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